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 Feb 2014 alasia
soul in torment
*** like suicide's
always better
when the lights
go out.
 Feb 2014 alasia
hkr
how accurate
 Feb 2014 alasia
hkr
i saw a quote the other day
about emptiness
and how no amount of love
on this planet
can fill it
when it's sincere
and i couldn't help but think
of myself
as a black hole
gaping and bare
stealing kisses in the dark
and words out of the mouths
of babes
just for the thrill
just for the reassurance
that i am desirable
but nothing more

because he took
the rest of my capabilities
with him.
this is a ****** poem but this quote hit me hard: "'you know what the problem is?' he asked, 'it's not that i'm not enough, it's that you're empty. you're just so ******* empty and greedy that every single person on this ******* planet could love you and it wouldn't be enough for you.'"
 Feb 2014 alasia
soul in torment
The
young lover's
committed suicide
by
inhaling
carbon dioxide
gas.
Join me in death
and
with kisses
steal my breath
 Feb 2014 alasia
purple orchid
Today
You asked me if I ever
Regretted
Any of the lame,
Crazy stuff that we did

I looked at me
I looked at you
Peering behind
Your concrete walls
And told you

That I
Am not one for regrets,
Don't dwell
On the shattered remains of

What could have been
What should have been
What would have been

That I
Meant every word I said
Meant every word silence uttered
Loved you before my words
Ever ignited a spark in
Your ice cold heart

That you,
Were worth it,
Worth it all

That we,
Were draped with gasoline
We burned like veldfires
Turning everything we
Touched to ash
That they had to call
The fire department

That
The kiss that haunts me
Day and night
The urge to embrace you
Every minute of the hour
The crave for your fiery skin
That burns my fingertips
Each time I caress you
That the hole you left
The scars that are written
On my heart
And each tear I shed
Doesn't compound to regret

You were worth it,
Worth it all
And I lied
I never should have said 'Hello'
Never should have
Let my eyes turn back
Never should have
Let you come back
I should have rejected you
Should have never loved you
I hate you
You pitted me against myself
Watched me destroy myself
You turned me into
Everything I didn't want
To be
An insecure little girl
A whiny female
An emotional wreck
I was fine with being
All of that on my own
Letting go is never easy
it's always going to be hard
that's just how it is
but if you can, I'll write you a card
giving up on dreams
is heartbreaking
believe me it's even harder
when your mind is shaking
but if you can
I'll write you a song
I'm sure it will help you
to move on
but right now you'll be sad
and you just want to be left alone
so I hope you don't mind
because all I wrote, was this poem...
 Feb 2014 alasia
rained-on parade
I lose you
like I lose my mind-

effortlessly.
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