I am not me anymore
Lost myself through a black door
My soul and body now separate
Put them together, I am desperate

We two are poles apart
Day by day the life depart
I cry, day and night
To make everything right

Only the desolate heart, beating hard
Inner child has long being scarred
A dying repertoire of beautiful thoughts
Words are fighting to end the wars

The only thing that I see in me
A falling soldier in a ****** sea
The last breaths that I am taking now
The wounds I got, I wonder how

Where is the hope, where is the sign
Black smoke over the fallen reign
If it gets too painful to swallow
I pray, I die now in this rotten hallow

I am ready to see the other side
Not scared of what may preside
The hell I have seen in my blood
Drowned in my own tear’s flood

The scars will always reminds me
Many deaths through it would be
Hell and heaven both are here
I am the one who has to bear…

The silent whisperings of the wind
The Enigmatic dances of the trees
They are welcoming my presence
After a long time I am home…

Woodpeckers are laughing with me
Warblers are making a fuss
A white moth came to greet me
After a long time I am home…

This place is God’s own
In the silence I can feel the soul
The music in the air is prayer
For making me alive and be here

On to the bed of fallen leafs
I want to rest my aching beliefs
Harsh journey I have been through
A beautiful world its suppose to

The Lianas are the playing ground
Where the childhood dreams rebound
The faint memories comes alive
After a long time I am home…

I know I am not alone
She is there if I ever get blown
Into the comforting lap of her
After a long time I am home…

I have been waiting long
To hear the unknown song
The words were gone adrift
The veil has now been lift
Moment I heard your voice
My heart had no more choice
Tears that fell from my eyes
Soon they made me realize
I have found the shelter
Your love is in the center
I have found my home
Inside your heart’s dome
This is just the beginning
To set the world spinning
The songs you sang for me
Words that made me see
Strings been playing hard
Heart that once was scarred
The music has been heard
Your rhythm has concurred
Long pain that’s inside me
Your love is the only key
Through my eyes window
You see the past shadow
The touch of your hand
Will make me withstand
The past, the present, the future
Your love is all that matters….

What is it that I crave for?
What is it that I want?
I have lost myself in time
I am guilty of the crime

I am standing middle of nowhere
I don’t know which way to go?
The standing ground gives a tremor
The thought makes me quiver

I have lost all the interests
The things I used to hold dear
Now those are my distant past
Nothing makes anything clear

What I want now?
This question keeps me awake
How will I shape my future?
The answer is yet to remake

I reach out for help
I reach out for support
The only thing I see
More questions I can bear

I am standing in a place
Where there is nothing
Even the darkness elude me
The light has gone beyond the reach

I know I can be many things
I have lost the will to see
Everything seems so unreal
Don’t know where it will lead

The things I once held so dear
Now they are against me
I am lost and so unclear
I even can’t see me

I cry for the enlighting visions
Those once were my souls
It seems I don’t have my eyes
The blindness have made me sore

Where I will find the answers?
When I will know what to do?
My inactions became my action
My action got lost in roar

The burning fire inside my veins
Washed away with time
The dream, the passion, the pain
Got replaced by desire to fail

Books say past is past
Live in the present
But how should I act in now?
To make sure I see tomorrow

What is it that I am going through?
What is it that I want anew?
My course of life has changed
Everything I have built, now chained

I want to be free
Free of all the decree
I want to know how I became
How I became like thee?

What is it that I am looking for?
The faraway land is waiting for?
I should let go of the fear
Thrive again to achieve the spear

Enough of living in the denial
I have to act and stop being senile
Accept that I have failed
I the one to be blamed

Time is now to rise once again
Like the phoenix and empire in ruin
The lost can always be found
The doomed can always be crowned…

There was a time I believed

The moments I have truly lived

Everything has now fallen apart

Only left is a stone heart



Sometimes when the past recalls

A white soul lurking in the walls

Renaissance of night has start

Only left is a stone heart



The tears were the strength

Shortening the melancholy length

Through the vein the ashes dart

Only left is a stone heart



The shadow, the rain, the thunder

Once made me to gaze in wonder

The storm has long being depart

Only left is a stone heart



The brightening pages were empty

To fill it with dreams aplenty

They are all gone off the chart

Only left is a stone heart…