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Adya Jha Oct 2017
It's hard to fall in love again
Because after all that I've been through
I very strongly believe that the only ones who can ever truly love you back
Are your parents and your dog
It's hard to fall in love again
Because I was born and brought up in a culture which said that all that matters is the outside
And the inside can just go *******
It's hard to fall in love again
Because it is shown that being fair is the only way you can be lovely
That all matrimonials ever wanted was a slim and b'ful lady
If this was an MCQ, I'll be the none of these
It's hard to fall in love again
Because I'm scared all men just want the body with curves and face like an angel
That the only things that should be big are your **** and your ***
Because who gives a **** about a big heart
It's hard to fall in love again
Because the words that he said in the past still haunt me, telling me that I'm not good enough
Pretty enough, **** enough, anything enough to be loved
It's hard to fall in love again
Because eventhough I read quotes on how beauty comes from within, it's proved wrong with every single encounter
Which leads to be believe that all that movies and books ever taught us about romance is absolute *******
That the only reason Jack ever loved Rose was because, well, she was ******* hot
It's hard to fall in love again
Because people don't see that you're born with the skin but it takes effort to build the soul
Because the skin will form wrinkles and sag with time
But the soul and the mind won't
It's hard to fall in love again
Because I don't want to add more to my list of insecurities and brokenness which scar me forever
Because I don't want to dive down and down and down into my worn out self esteem
It's so ******* hard to fall in love again
So I laugh it off and joke around
But everytime I see you
I really, really want to fall in love again
But I'm scared that you'll do the same and break whatever is left of me
That you'll turn me inside out and rub my imperfections till they burn
That you'll laugh with your friends and say
Where did that ***** even gather the guts from to come up to me and say, "Hey man, I like you"
Like that's the worst thing anyone could ever say to you?
They say
Love is a drug
But I think I'm in rehab
They say
Don't be cynical about love because in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
It is as perennial as the grass
But I think I'm better off in a barren land
A place that can accept me for who I am
So the next time you ask,
"Are you dating someone?"
And I reply with a snort and say, "Huh, look at me. No one would want to be with me."
And you say, "No, looks don't matter and the personality-"
I'll punch you in the ******* face
Because to hell with all your crap
You won't want to be me even for a single day
You won't want to be the ugly girl standing in the corner of the hallway
Adya Jha Oct 2017
If you're waiting for a Prince Charming
I'm sorry to break your fantasies
But he will never come
If you're waiting for someone
Handsome, funny, wealthy
Understanding and caring
All at the same time
Then you won't find one

But maybe you'll find a
Funny nutjob without a job
Or a wealthy guy shielded with walls
You'll find a
Handsome hero with a broken heart
Or maybe an understanding nerd
With no looks at all
Love won't measure and calculate
Because 'lovability' is like pineapple on pizza
It's not a thing
You'll fall for the worst of them
And the best of them
But none will be perfect

Who the **** created perfect?
It would be equal to infinity times better
It's like saying
Two parallel lines will meet
Or a zero will multiply itself over and over till it reaches a quantity
But actually, in what we feel and see
It won't, it's all abstract

Perfect doesn't exist
Prince Charming doesn't exist
But you can find someone
In whose pockets you can tuck your imperfections
And he can tuck it in yours
And you can be mismatching puzzle pieces
Trying to lock into each other
But not locking in completely
Trying to be of the same frequency
But varying in every other degree
You can be who you are, bare skin and bones
With each other but you'll never be
A fairytale or a happily ever after
Adya Jha Oct 2017
His voice is like cotton candy
Like icebergs melting into waterfalls
Like the warmth that can ignite the sky
The soft sound of dandelions in flight

The metaphors and similies fall short
He can tell me that all I know is wrong
And I would still believe him
Adya Jha Oct 2017
How would the world be
If you were mine

We would glide through the dance floor
Holding on to each other
On songs sweet and slow
We would run down the beach barefoot
Holding hands and making promises
Enjoy being young and in love
At night, I would bid your insecurities to sleep
Accept you for whoever you are
And as the sun breaks the darkness
Rising from the horizon
You'd sing me Ed Sheeran songs
We would hike up the mountains
Make love in the wildest of places
We would go for bike rides at midnight
Play old songs and sing like the world's gonna end
You would get me chocolates
Whenever its that time in the month
Hold back my hair
When I'm puking 'cause I'm drunk
We will go to the games together
And scream like our life depends on it
We will make a family together
Not of children, but of animals
Dogs, talking macaws, turtles, gerbils
We'll get matching tattoos
Not the cheesy ones but things like,
"I love nachos" cause we ******* do
We wouldn't be perfect because nothing is
But we'll trod through every storm
We wouldn't say all the right things in all the right places
But we'll stay together in love
Maybe things wither like flowers
But we'll enjoy the spring
Maybe we're not for forever
But we'll cherish the present

But you look the other way
Whenever I try to catch your eye
I have all these fantasies in place
But you never seem to try

How would the world be
If you were mine
Oh man,
How would the world be
If you were mine
Adya Jha Sep 2017
Behind closed doors and forgotten walls
Adorned with a garland around the frame
Is a black and white photograph of my grandmother
Worshipped each morning by my parents
You won't notice her if you pass by
But if you do, stop by and look
Her piercing gaze will remind you of all your sins
And make you wonder if photos actually have meaning
Her eyes will stare deep into mine
And tell me to talk, to make up for the conversations we lost
She will make you wonder what kind of a person she was
Did she want me to be who I am today?
Did she get stored in this photograph to remind me of her everyday?
Of a life lived long and the lessons learnt
Of the values and love that she holds
I talk to her sometimes
I'm partly amused at the stupidity
But partly intimidated by how her hidden presence
Tells me that I'll be fine no matter the circumstance
As long as she is there
Trapped in this photograph
Adya Jha Sep 2017
The old man comes to the park every day
He walks with his left hand outstretched
******* poking out, waving in air
As if that's the imaginary walking stick
With which he controls and coordinates
He turns and his other hand slides up
His slender arms like a bird's wings
That flies him to places we cannot see
And many may call him mentally *******
But I say, he lives in dreams
Adya Jha Aug 2017
I speak from the landfills, dumpsters and gutters
I speak from the corners you ignore
Because you don't want to acknowledge your contributions
You know you add to it more
Everytime your car passes
Your inner voice rants and screams
But you look the other way
And scrunch your nose up silently
No one wants to make a move
While we live in our fantasies
Away from the rag-pickers and sewage cleaners
Who segregate our waste for a mere salary
Who clean our **** while we throw some more at them
Who are not treated as human
We just want to get rid of things so we throw
Throw on the road, in the rivers and lakes
In the forests, in other peoples' place
We urinate and spit red paan on walls
We do our business on railway platforms
We live in a such a mess
We are such a mess
Our ideology is as filthy as these places
So I'm sorry, for such a disturbing poem
But it's time you better be disturbed
"Long years ago we made a tryst with destiny..."
70 years ago, these were Nehru's words
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