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I dropped her off on the other side of the city
Lights blur past my window
And I lose focus
A different kind of space travel

I don’t know why I drove here instead
The house on Ellen

I had always imagined it as a sad thing
Keeping the shape of comfort
Waiting lonely for me to come back to it

The shattered window
And the holed walls
The singed edge crop-circle in the living room carpet

I broke in
The place smelled new
Like fresh paint
And good credit

I am not a vandal
But these places don’t feel like home
Unless something has been broken

Tonight
It was just a lock

My tires hugged the road like it didn’t want me to be there
Like hydroplaning without the rain
And every red light turned green
Just after I hit the breaks
Like a bully placing a hand on my chest and then saying
“Nah, I’m just ******* with you. Keep on going.”

There’s this place I sleep most nights
Only
I am still in the parking lot writing this
And I don’t want to go upstairs yet

By my parking place
Frogs ribbit
They sound content
Though they live along the water drainage line that seems like a stream
Only there are more flies and crickets to eat here

Home is a funny place
So I have decided this

Not that I believe in God but
I’ve decided
His hands are as big as the world
So big it is easy to feel like no one is holding you
Even when you're being hurled a million miles an hour

And maybe that is why I feel I have no home
I mean
Hold me like you are small too
I've been drinking
Shadows settle
along paved roads
and fences where the
sunset chased
reflections in rear view mirror
glances
between photographs
and moments

where
       the
          night
             begged
                itself
                  to
                    stay...
in some collective box that held
daylight down by your
childhood home
free
holding limbs and fractures
and each remark swallowed
in churning sound
lungs of light and darkness
chewing itself away
in the hours
gone
on the long drive
home.
You put the syllables
in your pocket,
exposed to the sky
choked in blood and salt
and I knew you had me
wrapped in blankets of
paint
even though

you ran out a long time ago.
Even though, you have done
this a million times.
Even then,
you manage to
keep the flame
blue.

[ Thank You ]

I can't put  my finger on the trigger
of what drives my soul
to shoot fire upon
the cracks of your back
where lies have been told,
and puppies lay when
there is no one else to
curl up to.

This is a war
with paintbrushes and ink
swelled up against your wrist
like the tide crash of a
thousand acidic water droplets.
consonants strangle vowels
falling from the accident
that left your mouth
beat up with words and whispers
and things no one
ever wants to listen to.

I hear them.

These are just labels
that don't need definition
just all the same subject
that gets caught between
the questions you ask and the
answers I can't seem to find.

But,
I know we plan on being peaceful
and the hours between us
isn't absence.
I'm fully awake,
at the sound of your voice
and days from now
we will listen to what
we say in places of importance
and light will shine
down the river of your arms again
and tomorrow, will  be  better
than the ones before yesterday.

The fire will paint itself,
the bandages will
be the canvas.
My happiness is only in distractions.
It's when I'm alone
that I realize the full extent of what that means.
Another's smile makes my own spring in unexpectedness,
pleasantly surprised that it wasn't practiced.

I should be on Broadway,
with how consistently I play this role.
Of someone who gets by, whose only worry
is when to sleep and wake to work.

But this isn't me at all.
I close my nights with eyes that see a life unfold
a span of sorrow in disappointing my world.
Family that will cry at what I've failed to do
in the name of doing what I'm afraid I'll fail to live.

I'm so scared to leave this world
with nothing more than the dates I stayed.
The thought of having nothing to offer
mocks me into deserting instead of believing.
I wish for the strength to go beyond my own doubts,
the force to believe with every bit of flesh
that I can give my soul to the world.
I walk the world with thoughts of you
In every place I go
Your voice is on the winter wind
Your footprints in the snow
And every tool I try to use to scrape you from my mind
Cuts your name onto my tongue
And beats me till I'm blind
I layed my head upon your knees and breathed the air you breathed
I cut myself when you were cut to know just how you bleed
Now as I walk this empty earth with nothing but a face
To breathe me and to bleed me
Until I leave this place
The signal fire is
coming home.
Desperately clinging to smoke
from the shores gun,
we came from
heart in wire.


Two souls at a negotiating table,
one wounded,
the other taking them in.
Eyes-One String,
a pregnant belly full of
words. Your reclining head,
covered in violets.
Maybe its better,
if you don't say
this isn't everything you are.

The empty bar is quiet in New York..
20 secs till the last call as I run
to the next page, in the next chapter.
Fraile hands hold voices in quakes and
strange music. This room, a shade of wine,
suspended names in vocal chords.
Glasses filled all afternoon, now sip
as I draw the curtain.



comfortable silence blooms alongside a paved road,
somewhere only we know...
in stones it is scattered, spilled against
stolen skin, tattered never torn.
A skeleton key, the master of morse code.
Tattooed against my neck.
sweat.blood.tears
holding tight scars
beneath the surface.


intertwined fingertips pulsate
against the rim of paper,
like the marching bands of manhattan.
distance has torn this earth once,
vindication. Drive, Darling, Drive.
setting the fire, to the third bar.
lifting the sheets that cradle your ****** hands
an emergency room filled with nurses
the crossfire, in my bones, bleeding that
dark roman wine across tables of
a teenage dream.

A heroine saved a life, A hero is absolute.
searching for warmth beneath your pen, your scalpel.
found there is your lifeline, dense breath and trembling.
Stay, you found me.
Knitting away at your skin,
brushing against violet bruises,
imprints of days gone by.
A tower, someone like you, a soldier in silence.
memories reflected in abandoned tattooed houses.
curved around palms, grasping the last bit of
crimson tide.

The reason why: lights burn to crack the shutters
in an attempt to fix you, candles and fireflies
inside these lines, just say yes as the city winds
back down into the wild, and we into the fire.

bricks against our backs,
the electric feel of home, at your side now,
an outline of womb fired venom
fallen empires consuming
day old hate.
every drop of words, swallowed.
vicious stains left by hands, yours.

we go tonight,
this
poison and wine.
A wooden chair
held last night,
friday,
after the fall.
Like glycerine
dripping into rain
fast cars
As I continue to sew all of what your wrist let fly
away in this moment.
Georgia, Texas Rain.
Brush it off.
There are better days, ahead.
The remnants of life are on the blade.
For god sake, dear.
I wonder what a voice
would taste like
flowered in blood...

These are the hours
that ****** best
in sleep.

On the backdrop
of your clothed embrace,
I have sewn
the trees around me.
Pens fall from lips
quietly inside
a rush
of
dusty mouths laid
across the oceans piano.

The blood stricken
fruit of my heart
drips wine into
a salt rimmed glass.

Truth stained in his
wide, fragile, grin.
 Jan 2013 Aarin Mullins
Icarus M
The wind sighed
Forget.
Wet whistled lips
as teeth scrape along
to force a suppressed whisper
fabricated into a command
pleading with an element strong.
As the wind's breath
                                       takes and rips
two syllables before her
with no lines left to play the part.
                                   Empty.                                                    she stands there
threads of herself whirling
like hair in her face.
As the draft increases
and catches her on broad wings,
through the clouds
                                              to reach the sun
and fall to earth                                                            ­                                 Because she flew too close.
Close enough to feel the heat
Close enough to watch her tips singe
catch flame as her body neared the fringe      .      and let go       .      so close enough to feel the bliss
                                        Blistering.
       ­                                                           She screamed.
Searing.                                   Straining.  ­                                Suffocating.
                                                    ­                    In pain.
As her wings melted
dashing her towards the ground                                                           ­                             to impact
                                                                ­         hard dirt.
                                                          ­                                                                 ­                 The earth mumbled
                                                         ­                                                                 ­                                      *Regret.
"If Icarus was a girl, depression would be her prison."
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The feeling of your slightly unsteady heartbeat against my chest
makes me feel as though you're actually mine.
Like every single part of you belongs to me.
The soft touch of your vibrantly glowing skin
brushing against mine makes butterflies flutter in my stomach,
like a whole new world of excitement,  
it makes me feel like I can't breathe and my whole universe is spinning.
When our lips stroke, tiny sparks shoot up my body and blow my mind,
causing me to close my tired eyes and cherish every moment.
When we kiss I feel the corners of your  mouth curl up into a beautiful smile,
as beautiful as a ray of sunlight on sun kissed skin that shimmers.
Every time you look at me my heart pounds out of my chest,
destined to be close to you.
Every time you look at me with those astounding,
incredible eyes I feel like I'm a part of you,
like you're a part of me.
Your seductive scent lingers on your clothing as our bodies press when we hug,
releasing a whole new drug that I crave...
You.

Our hands clasped,
Our eyes locked,
*I think that you'll find...
forever we are entwined.
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