Every second I wished you dead,
after you touched me,
each stroke
reducing me
. . . human. . .
. . . animal. .  .
. . . worthless . . .

you died,
at the funeral,
  I did not cry,
but I did not want you to rot,
I did not want you to burn,
I did not want to shout from the pew,
I was worthless,
at that time I was five,
but now I am fine,
I guess this feeling
is forgiveness not for you
but for me.


↫↫↫↫↫ ＦㄖяⓖⓘＶє𝐧ᵉŜＳ ↬↬↬↬↬

Elegant,
     polished,
              refined,
                  a mother used to say
                                   "be like marble"

but like marble I am porous,
  so easily cracked,
      broken,
        chipped
            scratched.
              each injury a reminder of  my weakness.


Like Marble,
  age becomes endemic of problem unspoken,
      I am replaced,
           for I am weak,
              broken and cracked.

"Mother I am like marble"

-мαявℓє

Fiery mysterious exchanges of passion and pings,
an undiluted heart,
ever wondering, wanting, yearning, for more.
Unrelenting words that arrive in seconds. . .

Ordinary texts to incite conversation,
with invitations to serve as reassurance,
a heart that dwindles but still cares,
words that arrive in minutes. . .

Mundane routine,
eyes that barley peek,
ears that barley perk,
words that barley flow in hours.

Uninteresting,
forgotten memories,
ever so distant, ever so close, but ever unwanted.
and words that lay unread. . .


-ᵤₙᵣₑₐd

Green,
  mesmerizing deep green,
    waves of endless emotion,
      freckles,
         sweet marks of perfection.
"hi"
   one word
     tainted
          yellow
             impure
                love
                  at 5.

-ιɱρυɾҽ

Fairytale's do not exist,
  you will not awake from a grown mans kiss,
     he will swipe right, kiss you at night, and be gone the next day.

Fairy godmother will not free you,
   you will be bound the corporate overload that pays you,
     they will use you and abuse you, until you are discarded.

No one will climb your hair,
  you will fade into obscurity,
     a figment of a "friendship" that once existed


and even then
   in the face of reality
      I still believe people are good at heart.

-Gₒₒd ₐₜ ₕₑₐᵣₜ

Jealous filled eyes,
     walls that spoke,
         they took my career,
              made me rethink my life,
                      "was it worth it"
                        "am I worth it"
unanswered questions,
  piece by piece,
    the wolves of my own unrelating depredation
      left pieces of a foolish kind soul,
but a shattered heart
    can be taped
       over and over again
            so I say  " I am me"
                with pride.

d̶̮͎̐̔̏ë̸̢̢̤͎́ṕ̵̢͚̘̟̝̣͓̰̤̺͂̎͊͝ṛ̴̨̃̆̾ȩ̷͈̳̐̚d̷͉͍̯̃͋̔ͅa̶͛̌́̿̃͊̍­̢̻̥̻͎̲́̈́́ṭ̵̡̰̻͎̤̦̫̯̀̐̽̽͜į̸̱͉̖̱̯̹̹̱̓̒̂̐̔̂̿̎͋̚o̸̡͎̙̖̯̣̯̺̬͗̍͊̄̎̇n̶­̩̝̼͛̌

Sweet love,
old aesthete flame
  under a frozen autumn breeze
     I learned how to trust

  Warm inure flickering flame,
      I grow terrified,
         I opened up,
            and now there is an "us"

Sweet flame,
squeeze me tight,
   hold me tonight,
      bind me to your warmth.

Frozen Autumn breeze,
    listless flame extinguished,
          my heart is buried in dust,
             two heartbeats diverge into one.

Terrified once more,
    alone,
      & bound to you. . .

-𝐵𝑜𝓊𝓃𝒹