Her Masterpiece Is Her Story

Her paintbrush is a razor,
Her canvas, her wrists,
"I deserve the pain."
She shrugs and insists.

One day the brush will push down,
And it will cut so deep,
That this girl will fall
into an eternal sleep.

She doesn't remember how she started
What brought her interest to this,
How do you discover,
that cutting is your form of bliss?

No one would have guessed that she does it.
No one would have considered this one.
This girl is forever fighting a battle,
that she thinks the demons have won.

Her artwork is all over her,
Her beauty is on her thighs,
and if you look in her old trash,
you'll find her letters of goodbye.

Her masterpiece is quite disturbing,
Her masterpiece is a little gory,
Her artwork is her escape.
Let me tell you her story.

She compares herself to every person,
She is compared to each girl.
She thinks she's hideous,
And there's this boy that is her world.

She was bullied and picked on,
She was teased from head to toe,
Hard to believe that her best friend,
was her one and only foe.

Then later she disliked every little thing,
Her body, face and even her mind,
Soon she saw she was a failure,
and it was just in due time...

That this girl couldn't take it anymore
She'd decided she was done living this,
So one day she went home
and decided to end it.

Everyday for multiple days,
This girl would try to drown,
Hard to believe this girl at school,
never ever wore a frown.

Sometimes she'd just fall asleep crying,
Praying that she'd be enough,
Because she didn't want to leave her family.
She knew about their sweet love.

This girl found hope in small things eventually,
She soon would see this beautiful light,
and find a REAL best friend,
that helped her put up a fight.

Her masterpiece soon was leaving,
Her artwork was almost faded,
and it gave her a sick feeling,
the feeling of being jaded.

She found a boy that actually loved her,
And showed her love exists,
And this boy too had a masterpiece,
placed close to his wrists.

He related to her and she related to him.
She kissed his artwork and said he's not alone,
When she cut herself it hurt him,
Her masterpiece now wasn't just her own.

Her masterpiece effected others,
Her artwork wasn't just for herself,
She now had people,
who saw her cries for help.

And then her family found out,
So then they saw the art too,
to them they were just scars,
To her they were the truth.

She's trying to be okay now,
She thinks she might survive,
Even though they didn't think
to take away the knives.

I get this funny feeling way down deep inside.
My hands begin to shake whenever she walks by.
My heart begins to pound.
My head begins to whir.
Each and every time I even get near her.
I keep asking myself why I can't even say one word.
My mouth begins to open but my words come out all slurred.
It's really no big secret that I have the biggest crush.
everybody knows somehow that I might be in love.

Lost in the forest of memories,
The map of depression is the only guide i see.
****** razors, burning glass,
Death and darkness is all i ask.
Summarizing this story this paper will shred,
Asking for this to be over, asking for death.
Close my eyes and there you will be,
Open my eyes and all i see is me.
Where did you go when i needed you most,
the love you claimed to felt was just a hoax.
I know i will find my love, this is for sure,
Lost without a map, in search for her.

I look at myself in the mirror,
Disgusted by what I see.
Every time that you get nearer,
Is an unsolved mystery

You left me in the rain,
All alone and scared.
I dealt with all the pain,
From the love that we once shared.

My days and nights are mixed,
I can't stand another day.
It's something you can't fix,
With something that you say.

This ticking time bomb can't wait,
It will explode any minute.
If it is what it is then it's fate,
And neither of us will win it.

You hear of true love
In movies and books
But not based on
Popularity or looks.

I've searched every corner
Deep in my mind.
But this one little thing
I just could not find.

For it was not in my head
But deep in my heart.
Looking for this
Completely tore me apart.

Then one day I found it
This thing we call love.
It's something wonderful
Sent from above.

We stared at each other
As our faces turned red
Yet nothing was spoken
Nothing was said.

No words were needed
Because our hearts said it all.
We'd be together forever
For in love we did fall.

I slit my wrist to erase the pain,
you look at me, and think I'm insane,
my eyes turn red, bleeding my tears,
and still you try to protect me from my worst fears.
Look at my scars then you will see,
why I can't seem to go around and fake happy,
yet you tell me you love me, that you'll forget,
for I'll soon be gone, and I'll be your greatest regret.
So let me die, broken and scarred,
I can't deal with life, it's getting far to hard,
everything's gone wrong, it's not worth trying,
so leave me alone because I feel like I'm dying,
I don't want you to worry,
because my life is ending in a hurry,
I'll be fine, and happy you see,
for death is what I wished for and soon it will be.

You held my hand,
Looked into my eyes,
Said those three words,
It was our moment, Our time.
Time can heal,
But time, too, can wound.
Slowly you pulled away, There was nothing I could do.
Your touch never fades,
Your voice, it stayed,
But my heart, you took away,
Leaving me to wonder,
Will you ever come back?
My heart still aches, my tears still drop,
Pieces of my life are missing,
I still feel empty, I tried to stop,
Refusing the want or need
To hold on to the time long ago.
Sorry after sorry, you said to me,
Just one look at you, I said, "It's okay, really."
You asked me what could be done to make things better.
I said nothing, but my thoughts begged to differ,
I had to fight the urge to say, "Maybe you could come back."
You smiled the smile I love most,
The smile I would do anything for, no matter the cost,
But I knew things are never going back again,
I lost my love, I lost my best friend.
Possibilities are still open, chances are still there,
And I'll find someone who can fix the inside of me,
Or maybe our paths will cross again,
And this time, with hope, you'll stay.