For once

To be chosen
To be the first thought someone's has
And there last
To be picked for every event
Every gathering
Every laugh
And every cry

For once
The words "forever and always"
To mean what they are defined
And not just "for now"

For once
To be held until my tears stop
And to be still told
How beautiful my face is
Despite the tears and snot

For once
I want a friend
Who will always check on me
Make me laugh till I cry
Join me on crazy afternoons
And make sure I know how much good is in the world

For once
I just want to be chosen
To be loved unconditionally
And have a safe place to go when I fall

For once
I want something to last


Is that too much to ask?

Please don't wish me good night
Please don't wake up and message
Please don't send me funny pictures in the middle of the day
Please, don't

No need for blurred lines
No need for pain
I've already done enough
To blame for this game

Please don't smile when you think of me
Please don't hope for more
Please don't whisper my name
When your at the store

Please
Just don't
It's best this way
Distance to restablish lines
We carelessly over looked

Don't cry for me
Or smile at my thought
Please for me
Just leave it alone

It's best this way
Despite what some might say
It's best this way
Despite the pain it causes

Little black blade
So sweet
So sharp
Would anyone care
If you bled red for a night

Swift you would cut
Painless the cut
Red river flowing
A wind stopping

Little black blade
Lodged in a heart
Of hope and dreams
When life only delivered pain and misery

Little black blade
End it tonight please