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The phone is silent
The email does not ping
Nothing breaks the void

Her voice powerful
Her mind a raging fire
But her mouth stays closed

As time slips by
Tick tock
Oh look, another minute has passed
Your words are sweet
Your intentions kind
You strive to make me laugh

But the smile hides the tears
The laugh hides the sobs
Of my heart shattering against the wall

A love I know
A love that is real
A love that can never be
Simple action
And I'm out for weeks

My body complaining
With every movement I make

Throw me in a brace
Give me meds to take

Each on only showing
What damage I have done

Maybe one day
My body won't pop

Maybe one day
My body won't seize

Maybe one day
My body won't hurt anymore
Stroke here
Dip there
Wash over

Each placement having purpose
Each color having meaning
The design carefully crafted

To paint
To draw
To imagine

Is being able to see
More then what just
The world's sees
On the surface level
Maybe today will be good
Maybe today something will change
Maybe
Just maybe
I thought it would be fun
I thought it would be relaxing
I thought

I never thought you would walk
I never imagine I would turn a corner
And you would be gone

Tears dried into fear
Anxiety birthed a drive
To find you

You save me
And I lost you
How could I live with that

Thankfully you went home
Thankfully your not hurt
Thankfully

But how do you live
With almost losing
The thing that is you reason to live?
Cutter
Depressed
Suicidal
Self harmer

Titles
Names I have been fighting

So does it mater
With all the work I put in
Not to grab a blade
Not to just give up

When all you look at
Are the scars fading
Of a moment of weakness I had?
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