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  Mar 11 Laurel Selby
Marc Morais
If I sit too long, time gathers in my chest,
as my mind sees the finish line waiting for me—
It makes it hard to breathe
not from the aches of the world,
but from the slow diminishment of time—
my own.

I find myself caught,
between the urge to fight
and the desire to let go,
between wanting to stay
and fearing I’ve overstayed
my welcome.

I wish I could run backward in time—
through rain-soaked streets
where I should have spoken,
to rooms filled with words
I swallowed down.

To rewrite a road already traveled—
I’d keep close only a few,
kind souls etched in love and loss,
and have us meet on softer roads
and brighter dawns,
let love linger longer—
so much longer—
before it learns to fade away.

But the clock never bends,
so I dwell in tiny moments,
trading the vastness of tomorrow
for the precious depth of just one day—

There is comfort in knowing
not all battles are won
with clenched fists
or held breaths.

I have no wars left to fight—
only the love for others left in me,
fading to purple, barely breathing—
but finally unmoored.
Laurel Selby Mar 7
I breathe in sharp breaths
Chest rising then falls
Heart beating as fast
As this cyclonic squall
It's the waiting you see
That makes my mind race
It's the ever unknowing
South East Queenslanders
face
Mother nature holds vengeance
Maybe for all the wrongs we have done
She will hold us to account
Till her damage is done
Once we feel long waited calm
Mother nature's at peace
For our moment in time
Her destruction shall cease.
As we start to assess
and the clean ups begun
Alfred's fear becomes memories
With the warmth of the sun.
In just a few short hours from now we will be hit by Cyclone Alfred, our home falls within the predicted landfall zone, wind gusts of 150 kms (93.2mps) and possibly more than 400mm rain, some areas close to 700mm. It's the waiting that kills me, and the unknowing.
See you all in a few days, cheers Laurel
Laurel Selby Jan 28
I wish you could see my thoughts.
To be inside my head,
When the world gets way too much
And I don't get out of bed.

I wish you could feel my pain
To know what it's like to be me
When life seems like death
And it's all I feel and see.

I wish you could cry my tears
To try to stop this endless flow
When my heart seems like it's breaking
And my life feels so **** low.

I wish you could forget for me
All the trauma I've endured
When the night goes on forever
And my mind is so obscured.

I wish you could be just like me
As I stare into my mirror
The hardest thing I have to do
Is to learn how to forgive her.
It's funny how my outside can laugh and smile while my inside is screaming and dying.
Laurel Selby Jan 9
When I wake, I feel weighted
Weighted down,
Waiting for life.
When I wake I feel lost
Losing time losing memories.
When I wake I want sleep,
Sleeping dreams make it right.
Laurel Selby Jan 4
A fragile mind knows born to lose
A fragile mind has internal pain
A fragile mind is forever anxious
A fragile mind has demons no one can tame
A fragile mind sees  what most miss
A fragile mind hears the whisper of love
A fragile mind can dance to silence
A fragile mind knows of beauty within
A fragile mind lives strengths unmeasured
A fragile mind shall stand to exist.
Laurel Selby Jan 1
The void of emptiness
The black of night
The sound of silence
My soul takes flight

The questions asked
The fights re-lived
The fact I'm broken
My soul takes flight

The love that's lost
The time unshared
The signs of stress
My soul takes flight

The tiresome thoughts
The preempt plans
The truth of loneliness
My soul takes flight

Foretold is a saying that holds the control
They say when in trauma your soul just knows
To stop all the thoughts running round in your head,
To protect oneself mentally so you don't wind up dead.
Your soul chooses for you fight or flight as they say,
So I sit and I wait for the choice of the day.
For so many years the choice was to fight,
Leaving me tired and empty all day and all night.
My soul wears the scars so deep yet so clear,
Fight or flight brings me loneliness,
My one deepest fear.

Laurel Selby
01/01/2025
I lost my dad to cancer 23 days ago, I miss him so much, my head is heavy, my heart hurts.
Laurel Selby Dec 2024
Spotify
Discman
Walkman and Boombox
Four things in common
Is the music they play
Songs that you love
Loop over and over again
Songs to uplift, songs to mend hearts
Songs you can headbang to or move all body parts.
Music you play all to yourself,
No need to be embarrassed when it's only oneself.
To dream, sing and dance no rules to abide
Feeling that beat down deep inside
Ohh how the world so easily disappears
As soon as I place these phones in my ears...

6/7/24
Music is Life, without it I would be a long time....
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