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I had wishes of me and you in the future.
I had many beautiful dreams and actions that now falter.
I'm not sure what to feel right now as I am with most things.
If anything it hurts to feel right now. So all I can do is ignore the pain.
You were everything I wished for and more.
You were life itself before opening that ******* closet door.
I had high hopes before drowning on these high seas.
Now I only see the negative things wrong with me.
And I know it's not about being better.
I just know its about your ***.
I get that maybe I'm being selfish.
I just wanted to give you everything I don't have yet.
You filled me with motivation and my heart rises to your sunset.
But now you leave my earth.
And I'll cry as this everlasting moon sets.
Good bye my sweet alibi I'll live with you forever.
I'll always remmeber the time.
When I thought I could have you forever.
I guess for now I'll just love the sky.
Hoping it rains acid.
I'd rather disintegrate slowly, than be hurt and remember false passion.
Sometimes the going gets tough.
Acceptance.
An empty highway filled with joy.
The pieces of the sky that hold it together, so when the clouds don't form it won't fall on everyone's heads.
Echoes.
Shouting from the top of the mountains,  OBSCENITIES that involve no second thought, because there's that much hope put before your vocal chords scream that tune of free expression covered by the waterfall.
Warm hands.
Soft, quiet hands, that speak thier own language. Innocently and unknowingly.
Wilfully selfless yet triant.
Deceased.
Frail to the touch,  every bone in your body whispers.
Every moment SHOUTS,
Love without a conscious.
So it becomes natural and just.
Glow, radiate, expire, aspire, hope, joy, feel.
Feel. There's nothing more important.
Be true to yourself.
Hold that dear like if not for as much you'd freeze in the snow at the daybreak of summer.
To catch yourself before the world sees you cold.
Be free.
Express it please.
Love.
Help me smile again
The inks running thin while the sun sets and pins jab at my head.
A needle was never found in the hay stack so it just sank in my memory bank.
The lakes, the streams, the rivers of endless memories of you and me.
The chemicals released when you kissed me.
It was more than nothing like lava flowing, scortching everything in it's path.
Like my whole body was turning to ash and I was just waiting, melting slowly.
Help me smile again.
On the otherside of the rainbow,  nobody knows the sights as sore as your eyes the night we fought for the first time.
And the butterflies flew, even with clipped wings.
It was a never ending storm,  signaling for the light tower in the thickest of fog, the ray of hope never peaked its eyes or ever hollard for a sign of life.
We sunk that night.
And i think im still drowning.
Calling for land, searching for signs of life, hoping to grow wings like the birds alluding nearby land, before this wooden life raft gives out from underneath me.
Like a flower who wilted away.
Now again do I exsist for the purpose of exsistence sake.
I used to have a dream about being incomplete.
Then I met you.
And I  haven't had that dream since.
When the timings all wrong I'll know it's write.
Like the vows in your name.
Please be mine.

I Just wanna love you.
With endless meadows of color.
While the hills are green.
And I'm staring up at my brown eyed lover.

Let's be happy let's be together.
I just want to give everything.
To have her forever.

And it hurts so hard sometimes
Knowing I can't hold you,
Knowing it's not what you want.
But I just wanna love you.

Please tell me the harm in that.
Because this hurts so real.
I'm touching the sun
I'm touching but I can't feel.
And my fingertips are scorched but this loves surreal.

I just wanna love her.
I just wanna love her.
Why the **** am I alive.
What the **** is my purpose.
*** is my existence.
*** is my worth.
Can I just give my ******* life away to someone else?
I don't ******* want it.
I don't ******* need it.
I hate it.
Someone else out there can use this ******* life I'm wasting.
Can I just give it to them?
I'm so ******* tired.
I can't find a purpose. And when I do YOU ******* take it from me.
I ******* hate you and I hate myself and I hate this world.
Please ******* take me away and switch my souls.
Return me back to soil.
I'd have more value as that. Please I'm can't ******* do this anymore.
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