I don't know how to deal with this feeling of
Staring at ceiling .
Trying to piece together how I feel.
I don't hate you,
I just hate that I keep hoping you'll come back,
And we'll be together again.
I don't hate you,
I hate   my fargile heart,
That somehow keeps waiting for you.
I don't hate you,
I hate myself for believing,
That we could be great together.
I don't hate you,
I hate the moment where I said yes to you
And ruined the beautiful friendship we had.
I don't hate you,
I just hate that I still want us to be something.
I don't hate you,
But I guess I'm starting to.

He had wonderful eyes.
Not the type which makes you feel lost,
But the ones which makes you feel those butterflies.
The ones which look cold,
But are warm and dreamy.
They were quiet,
But beneath those eyes,
Were thousands of emotions,
Some fears,some tears.
Something that was meant to be mine.
I found something to hold on,
In those empty eyes of yours.
He had wonderful eyes.
The eyes that made me realise,
That what I see in them is just an illusion.

As I look at you,
I loose all my words
You are like a dream,
I die everyday in desire of living it.
I see you with her,the girl of your dreams,
I wish you could be with me with all of my fantasies.
You are the ocean,
So cruel so cold,
I drown everyday,
And you just don't care.
I hate to see you with her,
The girl of your dream,
But the idea of you in my head,
Never let's me sleep.
So I'll write this poem for you,
So you read and know.
But I know,
You'll never know,
Because till internity
You'll never be mine.

Pain is all I have.
There's no one to listen,
No one to care,
No one to see,
The pain I have within me.
Thousands sleepless nights,
There's nothing left that is right,
No hope,
No way left to cope.
I'm here all alone,
I know I've messed up,
But I'll make it right,
Allright .

I'm better off all by myself,
You took my pride away,
Leaving me with anxiety,
But I'll find another way,
You trying taking my life,
You target my weakness,
Burning my strength away,
But I'm not quite there yet,
You ain't seen the rest of me,
And I'm not giving in .

I'm loosing my sleep,
I walk in a line between confidence and suicide  .
I lost some people long a way,
Oh what a shame.
Demons torture my mind,
And I'm losing my mind.
I'm riding on broken dreams,
It's getting harder to see,
Slit my wrist ,****** fist  ,
Questioning why I exist.