They say don’t hate a boy too much,
Or one day, the lines might start to blur.
I swore I’d never change my view,
Yet something feels… different than before.

We barely talk, just passing by,
Yet his name lingers in the quiet.
Maybe we changed, or maybe not.

I sit with my thoughts, they whisper, they creep,
Dark little secrets I swore I would keep.

I scare myself with the things I feel,
The weight, the doubt, are any of them real?

I smile, I laugh, I play along,
But inside, it all feels so wrong.

Is it me, or just my mind?
I’m scared to look, scared to find.

I laugh in places I want to cry,
Hold it in, and pass it by.
To them, I’m calm — a steady line,
But deep inside, I’m almost fine.

I smiled for days,
laughed when it hurt,
held back the storm,
pretending it worked.

But silence grew loud,
and the weight too much—
one small word,
one final touch.

Then suddenly—
I couldn’t breathe,
tears spilled out
like I’d been set free.

It wasn’t planned,
it just had to start,
when holding it in
was tearing apart.

The clock hands move, they never rest,
While I stay stuck in yesterday.
I try to give the world my best,
But still, it finds a flaw each day.

There’s someone I call by something else,
not their name,
just a word that only I
seem to understand.

They move like they don’t know
they’ve been noticed.
They speak,
and the air changes.

It’s silly.
The nickname,
the feelings,
the way I look up a little too long.

But some things feel safer
when they stay unsaid.

Did I fall for a rumour
wrapped in soft lies?
Whispers said he liked me—
I believed with closed eyes.

One says it’s false,
just talk in the air,
but why did it feel
like something was there?

A glance,
a pause,
a maybe smile—
I held it close
for quite a while.

Maybe it’s foolish.
Maybe it’s gone.
But part of me hopes
they all got it wrong.

I picked you for trust,
Not just for show.
Thought maybe you’d care,
But now I don’t know.

One session in—
That’s all it took?
To vanish so fast
Without a second look?

You followed your friend,
Not your own spark.
Now I’m here running things
Alone in the dark.

“Busy,” you say—
But I’m not blind.
Feels more like
You’ve made up your mind.

Suggestions? I gave.
Patience? I tried.
Now I’m just drained,
Of hope and of pride.

You joined for what?
A passing thrill?
While I stayed loving
Every spill.

So thanks for the silence,
And wasting my time.
This was supposed to be sweet—
Now it just tastes like lime.

Maybe it was your laugh,
Or your eyes,
Or your smile,
It could've been your hair,
Your personality,
The way you act,
Or even your voice,
But ****,
you made me fall for you pretty **** hard.

If the sky could break,
would it shatter like glass,
or melt like a candle,
too tired to last?

Would the stars come falling,
like secrets we hide,
or would they just flicker,
then quietly die?

I say I’m fine,
It’s just easier that way,
No questions asked,
No truth to betray.

I smile and nod,
While I’m breaking inside,
Too scared to speak,
So I run and hide.

I’m tired of lying,
Tired of pain,
Wishing this silence
Would wash away like rain.

I named the clouds just to feel known,
told secrets to a skipping stone.
The wind replied with riddles sweet—
I laughed, alone, on crowded streets.

Oh, how I wish
to be like everyone else—
to still have their dad around,
to laugh with him,
argue,
make memories.

Mine left too soon.
I was too small
to even hold onto a moment,
let alone a memory..

Sometimes I watch them,
joking with their fathers,
rolling their eyes,
not realising how lucky they are..

And I just wish
I had that too.
But God had other plans,
and gave him peace
somewhere safer.

Still, it hurts—
knowing I’ll never get
the kind of moments
people take for granted.

I don’t even know him well,
But there’s something in the way I fell.
A glance, a laugh, the way he stands,
And now I’m stuck in daydream plans.

He doesn’t know, and that’s okay,
I watch from just a step away.
It’s nothing big, no spark, no rush,
Just a quiet little crush.

I told myself, it’s nothing big,
Just a glance, a smile, no need to dig.
But days went by, and still you stay,
In thoughts I can’t quite push away.

Not love, not deep, just quiet hush,
Still… it lingers, this little crush.

Maybe I’m just overthinking,
But it feels like a race I didn’t start.
Every move I make,
You echo—
Not with me,
But right beside.
You question my ways,
But offer no better ones.

It’s not a big deal,
But it builds.
And sometimes,
The way your eyes follow what mine do...
Makes me pause.

Maybe I’m wrong.
Maybe it’s nothing.
But still,
It weighs on me.

He looks,
Then turns.
Stays close,
Then burns.

No words,
Just signs.
A puzzle
Made of lines.

Let’s not sleep—
let’s overthink!
Let’s rethink
every awkward blink.

Let’s write a novel
in our head,
then cry about
what we should’ve said.

Sleep is boring.
Peace is fake.
Let’s spiral till
the morning breaks.

it’s not like I said it out loud,
not like I claimed it,
or made it a vow—
but still,
somehow,
it stings.

they laugh,
they tease,
and I stay still,
smile small,
heart heavy,
but chill.

because nobody knows,
right?
so I don’t have the right
to feel
this…
anything.

Not that I like you—
I just notice your face,
my heart speeds up
when you enter the place.

Not that I care—
but I hope you look back,
just once, just maybe,
before the world fades to black.

You don’t know,
but I orbit you.
Like a quiet moon
around a star
that never looks up.

Just close enough
to feel your light,
but too far
to ever talk.

My brain’s a vending machine
with the snacks all stuck—
ideas jammed,
buttons broken,
and no one’s got the right coin.

I wear my grin like porcelain—
polished, perfect,
cracked beneath.

They see the shine,
not the spiderwebs
that threaten to split me clean.

I laugh on cue,
walk the line,
but every step feels like a dare—
will I break,
or bend again?

No one notices the hairline fault.
They only see
a masterpiece
that never asked
to be displayed.

But here’s the twist
they’ll never know:
I dropped the real me
years ago.

in mirrors
that don’t smile back,
hide my storms
in shades of black.

No screams, no signs—
just steady breath,
and a thousand cracks
no one has met.

I’ve always wondered—
if I spoke more,
smiled more,
would I still seem scary?

Would my words
come out soft,
or sharp like they imagine?

Even I don’t know
why I wear this face.
Maybe I’ve forgotten
how to take it off.

Or maybe,
I’m just afraid
you won’t like
what’s underneath.

late assignments,
fake smiles,
quiet cries in bathroom tiles.

coffee cold,
tears hot,
people ask,
but then they don’t.

laugh too loud,
then fall apart,
holding duct tape to my heart.

“you okay?”
—“just tired.”
(again.)

I look at the stars and think of you,
How your smile feels like midnight skies.
You’re a wish I never knew
I made beneath those quiet lights.

I told the ceiling my secrets.
It blinked once,
then cracked a little.

Didn’t speak,
but it listened
better than most people do.

Now every time I lie down,
it stares back like
it’s holding
everything
I’m too tired to say again.

I stared at the clock—
and it blinked.
Just once.
As if it knew I knew.

Time slipped sideways,
my breath turned slow,
and shadows whispered
where light should go.

Maybe I’m dreaming.
Maybe I’m not.
But the moment paused—
and the silence forgot.

I walked a path I’ve never known,
Through whispering trees and cobblestone.
A house appeared—then slipped from sight,
Its windows blinking out the night.

The door creaked open, no one near,
Yet every room was filled with fear.
A mirror smiled without my face—
Then vanished, leaving not a trace.

I waved at my reflection,
it didn’t wave back.

Just blinked once,
then smirked.

I stepped closer.
It didn’t move.
I asked it,
“Which one of us is real?”

It cracked.
And whispered,
“Not you.”

The moon left me a note last night,
Tucked in a cloud, soft and white.
It whispered, “Why rush through the sky?
Even stars take their time to shine.”

I stand beside them, close enough to hear,
But somehow, my voice disappears.
They talk, they laugh, they make their plans,
And I’m just there, empty hands.

It’s not that they hate me, I know that’s not true (at least I think so),
But somehow, I’m never thought of too.
Not the first call, not the second glance,
Just a shadow in the background’s dance..

They don’t push me out, but they don’t pull me in,
Like I exist, but just barely fit in.
I wave, I smile, I try to be seen,
But I’m fading out in the space between.

Would they notice if I walked away?
Would they ask me why I didn’t stay?
Or would my name slip from their minds,
Lost in the shuffle of passing time?

It’s not their fault, they never see,
How it feels to be almost, but never fully me.
And maybe one day, I won’t have to try,
To feel like I belong, instead of just getting by.

I wish I could open up wide,
But most won’t see what’s kept inside.
So I stay quiet, smile instead,
While screaming words inside my head.

Ugh, Why Didn’t I Say Something?

Okay, so like… there was a time,
When you liked me, and I liked you—what a crime.
But I didn’t know, I was so clueless,
And now I’m here, feeling kinda useless.

You’re cute, you’re tall, it’s actually unfair,
And I catch myself trying not to stare.
Do you still feel the same, or is it too late?
Am I stuck overthinking while you’ve moved on straight?

I wish I had said it, just got it all out,
Instead of sitting here filled with doubt.
But maybe—just maybe—you still feel it too,
And you’re wondering the same thing about me and you.

I am holding it together
There is no weight too heavy
I’m used to the silence
Being alone doesn’t hurt
They don’t mean to forget me
I know I matter
I’m not breaking
I’m okay.

It wasn’t fireworks,
or some big spark.
It was the way you spoke,
calm and low,
and suddenly,
I couldn’t imagine
quiet
without you in it.