,...now
whatcouldyoupossiblywant¿
you're rea  _  ch  _  ing  _ ou _ t
when-we-both-know
that door's ~~******* | shut |
all. those. times.
you { ****** {me {in
just to spit> me >out >
oH; you're_wind//ing/ it/ up
again
& i'll dive 》right 》in
cuz\ ****\ if \i
can
@lovemyself
enough
to  ]] resist ]]

it's not (much) like a Virgo
to put.it.all.out.there
but earth needs water....to thrive
/so I live by the ocean/
...and it took a fish to bring the words...
to life.
It's not just about...her
...a wellspring was... sprung
and language spills out.
Something about walking toward sunrise (her smile)
the fog horns (her laugh) and eucalyptus (her story) has ...
got me.
It's not as if I've gone crazy...
but, she is my favorite fish ~ these days ~
...she had something(s) to say
her words and thoughts dropped desperate rain;
...I had no choice but to soak.her.in.
It's not so hard to fathom
I was born with a love for words...,
although, it's true,... I haven't
always had so much to say.
But there is some..thing
about that Pisces
that has me spinning,typing,spinning...away...
Don't take it literarily
...unless,.. the words move you.
Earth has a constant/unconscious
chatter...
even though,{ironically}, most of it is under...
water....
You might think me mad,
but there is a... hunger... I'm feeding,
and,.. I didn't know it was there
...until, (not.a.moment.too.soon.)
I found her.
So,... I live for these hours,...alone
...the words...they have their own....pleading.
I didn't even know it was in me...
but this well seems to run...deeply...
Oh,... how the one's before her would have adored it...
theywerecertainlynotprivy
to words of longing/love/needing.
Those are all. just .for. her.
although I know it seems...heavy.
But this GIRL has me flooded..
this fish...//has me//...swimming
...and I'm reveling in the struggle;
...even if/it's/just/treading/water.

ju* st another *sun day
^^UPSIDE^^ d
                      own
》inside《              》out 《
~~ pull ~ me ~ Ap~ ar ~ T
caN'T put. it. back.
#kiddingmyself
you mi gh t change-your-
mind ))
stack uP those minUtes
{buy back my life}
stu _ ck  __  he _ re
facedownonthefloor
some how/some way
| isn't | getting it;
done.

If only...
you were a.  p
                            o
                            e­
                            m

I could e.  r.  a. s. e.

[                 ]
[                 ]

each line...

...I could

ecapskc a b

every.  ...   l e t t e r

1.
at.
a.
time.

If only...you were

A ~ s°     n°
            O.      G.~~~

I could hit

               S }>k}>i}>p}>

I could p.r.e.s.s.

_mute

...l o v e...

comes¡so¡quickly¡

《yet》

..... FORGET///ing

takes

so  -  d/a/m/n/e/d/

loooooooooooooooonnnnnnnngggggggg

i  _ don't _ know
whatthisis
i'm calling it,
don't ^know ^if ^it's ^all ^too ^much
or if you _ don't _ know
how. to. love.
enough/ is/
enough
how you come
& go
while i just
stay
,...
 #put

you like to say poetry is everywhere...I'd like
to say it dances on your lips...tangled in,...
your hair,...swimming in your eyes,...tattooed
on your skin,..the freckles on your
chest,...your hands that hold whiskey and
books,...coffee cups,...and tiny hands that
bring so much love,...Poetry thrives in your
smile,...your laugh,...your *******,...the wet
reminder of longing and lust...the poetry
is,..you

Remember how it started...
Rasberry mocha
....Postcard from Chicago
Making love on the lifeguard tower
How we we soaked the sheets
.... in your apartment...that
Blistering summer

Pedaling through sunshine
To find the largest brews
...Reading in bed
Making a home...

Our kitten burrito
...Lazy afternoons
Spooning to football
...on the sofa

Your Masters show
Sundays in the print room
...The giant press
It took both of us to turn the wheel

My favorite friend
My favorite laugh
How I fell so much more in love with you
...each time you sang to me...
{****** voice}
......'Mon Cheri' Amore'

Our nephews...so tiny in our hands
... Christmas gingerbread
And quarters on the living room floor
Standing in the rain for hours to help a stranger;...78 bites later

I never felt more beaUtiful than
that day// in that dress// I do and I did
How we fit so perfectly/puzzled
...but we still fell to pieces

i feel
myself;
inthequiet
& i can.
breathe.
          again.

need >>> to let it go
justanothernight
on _ the _ floor
even my dog
doesn't wanna hang;
anY MorE
Spend so much time
       for/get//ting
ifonlyitwere
like = breathing
& i could be done
without- so--  much--- as
[a thought]
Then; here. I. am.
thinkingabouthow
I {shouldn't} be thinking
@you now
& **** it
i have to start all over
》》again,...

how do I
| S | T | O | P |
beinginlovewithyou
there. you. are.
with_  your_ whiskey _ and_ your
hammock\truth.
& you can change-your-look
i see you; the same
know the girl^ in ^love ^with ^words,
romance//minutes lost in a kiss
while i'm just spilling letters
pouring myself; in vain
& IT'S the gravel and the gl***
stU. Ck in between each s/w/al/   low
as i search the rhymes
for ~ some ~》reason
¿when will you ¿ever¿
come a/ gain¿

how many minutes will it take
there is a sound it makes
peeling back my skin
would be easier

it was always the birds
and the freckles
on your chest
that mattered to me

and i only hear
your breathing now
or nothing at all
stranded in cotton sheets

shades/of/gray
&thesoundofyourname;
when breathing = needing
&wishes;
are just. empty. cups.
&forgottensongs;
it's _ mostly <always> _ you _  
&poetry;
all the hues we heard
sk,...ip,...ping,.. ₩ords,...
like sk _ ip _ ping st _ one _ s
&yourheartbeatisall;
that could ever{really}matter
to ○ me

walking along i
look up at the moon
it's only a silver sliver
an end to summer
&so.;        i thought of
you;
the tiny pieces
left ^inside ^of ^me
always
[in all ways]
just _ under _ my _ skin
not really a pain
mostly//likely
an ache
nestledthere
behind
my ribs
along with the 》 long.   ing
burrowed
withinthemarrow
of each
bone

dr _ unk a//gain
ihavenoshame
,...sip you in,...
my love
my friend
Draw. A. Line.
~use ~a ~pen
& here we are
》》back agaIN
i know [the score]
^how  ^you ^^seep.in
you miss me now
right-up-until
you're 《《back with her
ssssslide right in
& i'll stand| by |
#encouraging

i'm {pretty} certain
i'llbestaying
in | love | with you
Oh >> I wouldn't choose it
it just >set>tled >there
behind. each. rib.
under _ my _ tongue _
between-each-breath
the grind
& the gasps
e•ve•r•y ••••sigh
= empty resign
at. just. the. thought.
of your
× name ×

& how you
shrug-me-off
words and thoughts
takeanothershot
,...i think,... i know
you see~m
inclined;
but
\don't

¿did i make it all up¿
what\ i \thought
this. was.
you _ just _ dropped _ off
whileiwassosure
of. this. love.

but wait,...I had s. o. m. e. hope
itfeltsostrange in my body
so displaced on-my-tongue
let's just be honest; I knew that it didn't
be\Long

it's a place I've. come. to. know.
A little {A lot} Too Well
it's sick; i've found there's a comfort
~in the broken~
grown "ac"cust"om"ed" to this hell

oh-sweet-love; i don't have the vanity to
pretend
...that your g. o. n. e.  doesn't a\c\h\e\
... my whiskey bears witness to how
my >hands> qui>ver > and> shake

spendingmy nights
on-the-living-room-floor
dra _ gg _ ing>>>  a cigarette
while 'ole Keaton sings... my... songs...

^H^op^E^ is wish _ ful th°in°king°
better saved for those who-know-it's-worth
cause I've tossedthedice; and/my/love
,... and it {just} hasn't been,... e n o  **ugh.

letting...it...go
But/can/someone
...please...
Tell
me

What do I do with the [    space.    ]
left
...///between//

us

I can't shake ...
the hold/the clasp/the clench...
All/my/air.
...she told me... I/had/a/
....good //name.
...And
I can't-explain-to-anyone
(She's probably the only
heartbeat to.get.it//said it)
...why it even...matters.
But the sentiment has. ..
... s. t.
>U.
>C.
k.
And i'm Swallowing marbles
...At the thought/of/it
[IKnowsheknowsiknow]
In the end...
It's those {little}
...Things
that so easily could go... <un-noticed>
{WE noticed everything
sheandi}
..That was the beginning
Of the beginning
[That barely got a start]
So many ~little~ things...
//armwrestlingpoetswhiskeyart//

In the end it's so... p l a i n...to see

...it's so.often.the {small---est} shards...
that cause.the.most.
...harm.

breathe. you. in.
Sun~day~morn~     ings
tuckedincottonsheets
& i'm stuck in Tuesdays
it's> close
it's> progress >>
get\ting\clos\er
brown-sugar-in-my-coffee
morning ^walks^
#remindme
just _  how _ far
away;
¿how can you sleep¿
k{now}ing
our melt
it leaves°me °hanging°
》you go    》 on
over. there.
[ill be here]
ifeveryoushould
₩ant
me

I guess...you could be...right...
since when does irrational...pay off...?
And... you have your reasons;
there's a list as long as your arm.
I assume you've thought.this.through.
I'm left to accept...
making love to you... would probably have
been my death;
After all,...just the thought stops my chest.
I realize...your fear is valid;
I'm sure your...taste... would leave me...
starving.
Clearly, you know what you know you know what you
know,...you know...
There was no//where this could go.
I presume you're sure you're correct,...
your voice is my honey,.. but I'm sure
you've got words that could...sting.
You're so certain STOP is more suitable
...and ' irrational ' is too risky;
for sensitive little fishes.
I know you have been here...before...
Chasing the unknown;
But that was a different girl -
You should remember that I'm/not/her;or her;...
I'm thinking you'd like to be convinced this is
wise
~letting it go~
...even though I see the sun/rise in your
eyes...
And I could love you...clean.
You're probably right,...if you so insist...
I'm sure we're.better.off.
Not.
Knowing.

let _ me
| camp | here
inyourgaze
sleep> there>
on. your. lips.
[wrap-me-up] in your
words & your
^arms^
here's the 'simple' "
#truth;
i can fi\nal\ly breathe
aga**in

call it
whatyouwill
there's {no} room for
shame
that-slipped-through
a. long. time. ago.
dear.
she's> taken> up; with
pride.
each/ does/ so/ well/
To
stay _ out _ of _ your
sight

just for the record
i always knew how lucky
i was next to you

Ok,....
here _ we _ are;
《back 《again.
{i can't breathe....}
don'tknowwhoiam
¿How could i miss
the° signs°
the cu€;
What you. Meant¿

You held\ my hand\
You let \ me in\
yet, here you are,
~telling ~me
there-is-nothing-there,...

[i'm so] confused
¿have i gone mad¿
Howdidimiss
what-ever-it-is;
your intent¿

You^ took^ my^ heart,
in-your-hand
& just as quick.
You. toSSed. it.
back.

there ^is ^a ^sound
/it makes//
this.  falling~~down~
for you
it's late nights
& neckbites
whiskey
& red lights
it 》 rushes¡ in¡
to | spite | my | head |
co-ntra-dic----ts
the words <you said>
the + count+less+seconds+
since. we. met.
s imply s pent
running laps
toholdmybreath

¿how to¿
make _ peace _ w/ _ time
<that
bitter sense**
of-the-moments-which
grate\my\bones
<some
end~less~ re~ver~ie
#whereyouare
& if there. are. any.
thoughts> of> me
<maybe
[it's just me]
or may _ be it's }} {obsess}ing
& i'm stuck || stalled ||
<here
my^ hand^ in^ the^ air^
be>gg>ing <[> for
¥our
<scru° tin°   y°

i don't. know. the.
word; there's
the s
             in
                   K
& the }}} p   e  e l
all i taste is in
(vain)
she's said
she so  [rare] ly
| standsstill |
& i know
those things i
need.
there is no 》get》ting 》
#there w/her
besttojust
for.      get.

be _ ginnings arethebest
...the spinning swell of joy. in. your. chest.
the hours con((sum))ed
by thoughts,...she/ and /you

pinS. Sss and g _ lass
workingupto a 》》kiss
reading ev\er\y mo ve me n.  t
dizzy in-the-bliss

The plung@ing thro>>ugh
...places so Un//shown
Un _ sure Un _ seen
Un ^^^^imaginable  Un~ known

and you knot your. whole. existence;
in an
        ti
          ci
             pa
                    ........tion of  _  her _  lips
Fingers slow》ly.  edg》ing closer
press. Your. thumbs. Into. her. _  _  _  hips

You'd/say/anything to see¡ that¡ smile¡
...how; her laugh can-make-your-day
And her e y e s will make you w^o^n^d^e^r
If you'll
....everseeanother c o l o r.......a/gain

Honesty; A Funny Thing
everyone says it's what they want
but what they need is a reflection
of their own thoughts

i have been honest
i say what i feel \ feel what i say
keep giving chunks of this heart away
pieces of me strung all over the place

and the poet and the writer
who've camped in my chest
the aristist i married
wrecking ***** & trainwrecks

all one-in-the-same
they each dug inside
...some with spoons//
...some with knives

i just wanted to hold. your. hand.
and sing all the songs
at the top^of^our ^ LuNg _ s
likewedid on a Saturday inthatoldtown#bar

there was a _ space _  in time
minutesandhours
we~so~en~twin~ed
i-finished-your-sentences
while­ you pen//ned/ in/ mine

and the pages of lettersandwords
of love ^and ^loss and ^longing
made our bed & held our hearts
binding-us-together in those thoughts

it was some. kind. of. magic.
only known by those who feelthescore
and hear 》the 》colors and always
always,...in all ways...seek the,.... more

how you touched e\ver\y inch ofmybody
the sweet se^duc^tion of your mind
most in. ti mate experience
beforeweeverevenmet

how I-had-to-have-you
and how you 》gave 》》in
our kissing drew audience
but I neverfeltanyone in the room but you

and I couldn't have your lips enough
how I didn't want. to. stop.
how you>felt^ in^ my >hands
how you ta _ _st _ _ ed inmymouth

& how you went si(gh)lent
how you just c//u//t//me//out
like I was some °°°°cancer;
...as if none-of-it-mattered

where are you now//
i want the girl~that i met
Who told me how I was ****//ing her
...because I knew. what. she. meant.

            all the words we shared

how can you bear to deny it?

How can you bear to deny it, ..

how can you b(e)ar(e) it,...?

there are
so ¡many¡ times
when i \catch myself/
in °°wonder °•○●
¿how is it that
you are so
]] lodged ]in my ]]thoughts]]
ever ~sp~in~ning~ there
not {even really}
in.    my head,...
it's kind of
in. my. bones.
^cell<>ular^
from the | moment |
we met
on >the >edge
the precipice,.....of some _ thing;
}tangled{ in you.
& it's not as if i'm
//complaining.
only that i
don't - know - how
tonotmissyou

It was im//pos//sible from the start
..but my god...
...You were delicious
I have held you in my
mouth...
I have held you on my
...tongue
I have spilled my words and my
...heart
As you rest there against my
teeth//
I tasted your letters and I drank your
Loves
And now I'm just here
........starving.

Words that fell so...easily
...now stalled within my mouth.
Our static/electric/con-nec-tion
...faint and all but ground.ed.out.
Violet/crimson/tangerine
...whitewashed to simple gray.
The tension of.the.wanting
...slackened-slip-knot...
given; way.
My head is above^ground^again
...My feet treaded/your/way
Now that you've chosen...n o t h in g
...only scattered letters
....left...to...claim.
The spell...has been/b/r/o/k/e/n.
...You made your point-of-pain;...
you,...so convinced 'defeat and ruin'
...the only outcomes gained.
Your reasons and your why's
{You so clea(n)r-ly cling to fear}
There's a calm...you've...found
....in-holding-on to old love and/old/tears.
Although I tend/to/let/slip ONLY
..what's been torn from my clenched F ist S.
I realize in my heart-break-moment
There.... is.a.certain//...
...Mercy...
...found.../in/this.

layers-of-you
| layers | of | truth |
is it ¿ still a lie¿
when you just. don't. say.
Who am i to = judge
i ~ had~ your mouth &
"maybe" a few other ones
but; here ^ you ^ are ^
《back 《 again
Stepping out//sliding in
how. easily. you'll. pull. me. in.
such  _.  a sucker {for those eyes.}
& slow gin
the ¡sound¡ you ¡make¡
whenyoufeelthepleasure
of _  the _ pain
how it #lingers [with you]
the/ next /day
you don't _ ever _ have _ to _
saY;

layers-of-you
| layers | of | truth |
is it ¿ still a lie¿
when you just. don't. say.
Who am i to = judge
i ~ had~ your mouth &
"maybe" a few other ones
but; here ^ you ^ are ^
《back 《 again
Stepping out//sliding in
how. easily. you'll. pull. me. in.
such  _.  a sucker {for those eyes.}
& slow gin
the ¡sound¡ you ¡make¡
whenyoufeelthepleasure
of _  the _ pain
how it #lingers [with you]
the/ next /day;
you don't _ ever _ have _ to _
saY

silence
ScrEamS your
c
H
o.   <youcouldhavejustsaid>
i
C
e

YOU;,...didn't have to
LeT the flo
                wers,...die
To
prove/a/point

Be_cause
The only lie^i^told^
was when i said the
Po
    Ems
Weren't a\b\o\u\T
you, Y o u, {o, u, Y}¿

>>>>Mostly
i.just.want.you.
To have(andtohold)
Allofthethings
....EVEN IF
it's
with//so {me} one
//else...

Oh* howIfucking hate <loving> you
{forgetyou}
& how too u try to placate  _ YoU;
wear your passion // darling
own.  your. wants.
you _ are _ so _ much _  prettier
   with.    them.         on.

what.
]] will it ]] ever
take;
scrape /you /from /my /bones
squeeze } you { from my soul
if. only. to.
forget.
hazel
& those hands
for
your ~ laugh ~ to be
less than a  | memory |
& (mercifully)
left -out -of -my
dreams
time cr _ aw _ ls a _ lon __ g
while 《whiskey《 brings 《you
back
those sad songs [i favor]
^have me^
#sittingonthefloor
while words & rhymes
simply shred;
₩hat€ver
is
@left

{tan}g}led} in your sheets
don't-know-what-it-means
i only know
your taste
andIjustwantyouto
>come>>again>>>
you'll _ tell _ me _  i _ should
let. it. go.
be/cause/you/don't
trustyourself at all
in~the~end
i need to know
the》 sound》 in 》your》 throat
when\YouLetMe\in
& you.   let.  go.
[knuckle deep]
¡tongue¡ explores¡
#lostinyourmoments
I want
...more.