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The truly honest are the most brave.
They have us beat, with nothing to show for it.
These pumped up hearts always try and
escape. We always die, die, die.

Those unable to preach the only word they know.
Those unwritten notes live in our hearts;
never on paper: That is the only death
that leaves an unwilling imprint in our souls.

Of course, death does not care for us.
It waits, like a statue waiting for its artist to return.
Patiently, hopeful that this night the moon forgets
to shine as bright as suicide in July.

Death, in all its unknown forms;
is in her voice, in his unanswered request for
another chance. That is the death I know.
It is the one that needs to repent.

Death is the transformation that will not disappoint.
It is clock work, from boy to man.
Girl to woman:
It is puberty at fifteen.
Sometimes,

All the time,
People look into
Others peoples eyes
And spot a soul.
Another home.
The windows into

These homes

Are all the lonely have.

They've become tired of
Their own soul.

They
Are
Tired of their own home.
A woman named Emma
decided this was the day to die.
For you see, She was tired
of her writings,
of this dilemma;
the dilemma of life.

She made herself eggs;
of course with butter and toast.
The coffee had never tasted better,
Even though she still felt remorse.
She put her tongue back in her throat.

After breakfast she showered and put on a dress.
She dared to not wear make up;
this way the day to be not like the rest.
This was the day to wake up.

Emma walked out the door and left it ajared
It was pointless to lock it now.
She threw her keys into the neighbors porch.
"Good riddance," she thought,
Of this and all the clever sorts.

She walked for mile upon mile,
and it never occurred to her;
she would never see those smiles;
and for this she felt vile.
"I'm sorry."

The thing about black dye though,
that is never said aloud.
The who, what, where, and hows
matter little to a broken soul.

Emma continued towards that west coast;
this way the day to Die.
"This is an homage to Virginia Woolf," she thought.
At this point she was unable to cry;
just go on and Die.

Those journals of Kafka
and machismo of Hemingway
do nothing for her now.
Writers are the worse lovers,
they are born with no heart.

They all react much to quickly.
This is all cliche.
I saw an old woman today,
Walking through the rain,
Alone,

And I remembered;

Loneliness is real.
You can't go back.
The time of innocence
And baby blue bottles
Is over, like your favorite movie.
Those scenes are done.
Cut!
They belong to an idea now.
Your idea.
It only manifest just as that;
It can't run, crawl, or ask
For you anymore.

Being aware of everything is
God smiling at us.
We are allowed all the
Knowledge of the world
Now.
You can have it back.

You can't go back.
The days of surprise
Are dead.
**** that cancer!

Running for joy is
Now becomes need.
Crawling now becomes
Begging.
Asking for anything
Transforms into a cry
For help.

You can't go back,
As much as you
Need to.

I'm sorry for that.
All of it.
All of us.
My body;
skinny figure for a
fragile boy.
My soul;
invisible to me,
completely new.
My heart;
it cannot be composed.
Ever.
My tears;
those rivers that
never dry.

"I'll keep you company"

This must be the
fragments of love.

Come closer;
The anger will subside.
Go away;
contradictions never hide.
Will you take...
I'll take you.

These are the
fragments of hope.

My darling;
I never lied to you.
My Lover;
I won't lie to you.
Me and you;
I know no other way.

These are the
remnants of my
loveless youth.
You languish in angst that is full of needy sores.
Those blue viles come straight from heaven to send you to hell.
It's the only respite from everything
I was;
Everything I can't.
This language has the odor of death.
This stamp on my heart is dried,
Broken,
Dead.

A river runs from my heart to yours.
They are now separated by crooked ways;
They go this way and that.
Still though, we occasionally meet at the place where death meets our tattered hearts.

July is the season for lovers unwilling to know everything about the stars.
October hides it's own language too.
Listen for the secrets of August.

Anne Sexton knew what death really is and was and will always be.
It is not an escape.
It is not rest.
It is everything left unfaid.

"I still love you."

That's my truth.
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