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Batchelor Feb 2020
(Let's go)
Up and down the boulevard of broken dreams

(Shy glance)
Across the boulevard of broken dreams

Saw her again
Shy, like my Dana
Sultry lips
With a scent of distinctness
Infatuated with the thighs, tempting
Inviting, so much like an oasis
In the middle of sandy dunes, twin suns

Two steps from hell
Disturbed
Five fingers I raise
Four I keep, one thumb I raise
Dana walks over to me and smiles.
A dissonant step into a landscape in between the events of The One Draped In Orange and Ashtongue, but coming face to face with the Lady In Red ; now the current Red Queen. January 2017, and many more.
Batchelor Feb 2020
You saw to that, I'd never stray.
Now everything's tumbling like cards.

Your kisses, were they for naught?
I mean, how could you?

Didn't we promise to grow old together?
Did the sweat of your brow on mine mean nothing?

On this hot asphalt. I'm left alone.
The dissociative identity kicks in and I'm struggling to remind myself why I'm here.

honey it was over before it began
he's so much better.
blame me if you must but know you started the clock.
whatever you feel now you deserve it.

Ah yes. I see it now.
The smokey-eyed stranger.
A scent of days long past.
Soft sounds of lapping water on my feet.
A cloth yet to be stained.
The book that was never read.

and you have no right, love.
shame in grey, shame in color.
you don't deserve love.
the clarions scream and you love in technicolor.
come back again when you can come up here once and for all.
wake up. wake up.

***** it, forgot my pills again.
The first of 2017's series,
Where we bleed into each other,
And my pain starts to leave me, but not without getting deeper.
Batchelor Feb 2020
Thus loneliness encumbers my shoulders and heart again.
It feels like a singular kiss, amongst a hail storm of hellstricken bullets.
Snowflakes in a garden of rust.
An amoeba separated from its kin, unable to split.
21 decided to be divided to 4.
Perhaps my worth as a wordsmith wasn't as great as I thought.
Thus the feeling draws on itself, in a constant art and motion, an Ouroboros Serpent.
Like how I used to stammer and stutter badly as a child, ironing myself out but falling and scraping yet never bruising my eagerness.
Nostalgia and adventure are just means for one to hide in security.
Perhaps one day, one day I'll fall in love again.
Baggy pants, oversized shirts and a lioness, wispy and delicate. But alight with fire, with life all the same.
And the rain fell on me, eliciting no tears, but ripped my pores apart, and whiffs of an old perfume, of ghosts. Playing to the tune of yesterday, I swept across with her. And I let her go, as the dust settled on my tongue and ash filled it, and was gone.
The lady who ran this place, bowed and closed the mausoleum, and I asked, "How much for your services?" And then she said, "You couldn't afford it."
I walked away into a wasteland blooming again. There's no sweet taste of victory here.
Only death's touch remains, all-cleansing and all-equalising.
I pick her up, and she said, "What took you so long?"
I sigh.
"It's nothing."
The melodious cacophony of both love and hate, crashing smashing and finally tearing themselves apart. Circa 2013.
Batchelor Feb 2020
Your lipstick stain remains on my collar.
Abstract chaos and unquenchable desire stampedes through my veins.
Every breath I take, I suppress this raging impulse to make you swoon, to mark you.
If it was yesterday that made me feel this way, and tomorrow is uncertain, submit as I devour your entirety in my hollowed-out soul.
Perhaps in this cruel mood, this sublime harlot will drown all other thoughts.. save the ******.
The listless fervour, new dew sticky, gumdrops amongst the humdrum.
Inexplicable thoughts short out and fizzle out as the waves from the shores all too familiar
smash again and again.
 Hiccups turned into gasps as measuring standards disappear into a place where electricity takes over.
When the cold days erupt into gardens of dead roses long thought lost amidst secret gardens for a blissful moment where ****, famine, scars and hope all implode for a single moment.
Alas, it is but a single moment, subsiding oxytocin as we turn and face away, and I leave the deed on the dresser.
To walk away and repeat another day, just not with this almost lover.
Shrug it off and return back to your 9 to 5.
The prototypes for Blood And Tears, also known as Basic Instinct, 2017's work.
Batchelor Feb 2020
You are the space in between my thoughts.
You are the grand design in which I am overseer.
Atrast nal tunsha -- may you always find your way in the dark.
You are the electricity that runs in my brain.
Closer and closer your lips pull to mine. And I desecrate your innocence in mine.
You have become the space between sentences. The pause between ragged breaths. The dusk of a million light switches turned off.
The trenches & blood rivers.
The bloodied walls and leather welts.
This is a feeling rarely experienced, rolling sadness on my tongue as expressions reveal pained smiles.
Time itself slows to a crawl, as the sadness screeches to a halt.
My godless self, my red draped black cat, my ashen kiss, the ghost, the illusion, the missed connection, the graveyard soil.
And a secret involvement in your ******. A lifelong commitment to uncertainty. Undertaking love, reciting the future, guarding the past.
"Who are you, that you don't know your own history?" - Lonesome Road
The only thing to be colorless, odorless, not have any physical form yet cuts, wounds and festers as if it was alive.
You exist. In rotting words, putrid flesh and fading art.
You exist. In quivering lips, shivering hands and eternal *******.
You exist. In the covenant of the womb, the atoms racing together to create you & break apart when you end.
I'm coming back home to my lights and shadows.
The beginning of another end, the ending of another beginning. Here the start begins, before The Black King meets The Lady In Black. The story ends, in 2019. But for now, the rollercoaster ride of hell starts.. ever so slowly. Circa 2015, to The Other Half, before she is anointed as The Red Queen.
Batchelor Feb 2020
"We are defined by the choices we make."
How do we truly understand this sentence, then?
Is it the bottom of the beer bottle in which we find it?
Or the passionate afternoon with that red haired stranger?
Maybe perhaps that beautiful pointless death you bloomed within yourself.
In which case you smiled and said, "It's alright."
Maybe the breaking point was when you realised you spent conforming to avoid being branded otherwise.
Self-immolation isn't that much fun.
It began with a heart-burn.
And continued with a tussle for control within.
Til you realised you could no longer pretend you wanted both sides of the cake.
The hunter and prey.
Then you awoke.
And saw that you were no better, no less than the entirety of the roads you took.
Now this is where you made or broke.
A knife to the arm, a rope to the neck, a pill to wash it all away.
A cacophonous tremor rippling across your psyche.
And you realised.
"Do I deserve this future, death, life I've been craving for? Or are we always, sometimes monsters?"
The fires start to singe and twist their way around the other bridges to the other unnamed Brides, circa 2014.
Batchelor Feb 2020
Our dead states and best conditions become null in the face of each other's prettiest nightmares.
Numbed fingers and downcast eyes are all that echo throughout the noise we make.
But we love. And we synthesize noises to feel something.
Screeching and howling all we hide to get past  a dead state to find better conditions.
Patterns ****** on xylophones but we can't look back.
But I know I'm worse off without you.
Frame me for anything. I'll give it all up for you.
Trapped but as free as I could ever feel or remember.
The author's mind is still a wreck, circa 2012.
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