how do i feel? like theres a knife in my chest. like theres a gun to my head and my fingers on the trigger. like my stomach tied itself in knots. like life is kicking me out the door. like death is calling my name. like you didnt even try. How do you feel?
Every move that i make, is another mistke, cause im moving away from you... Im broken im down, where do i go now? you were all that mattered to me. Your driving me crazy, you refuse to save me, and now i dont even know your name.
pain calms my demons blood sooths my soul scars stain my skin blades make me whole music distracts me pills take me away nightmares are real in darkness they stay loving cold nights stars filling the skies trapped in my own hell writing goodbyes gun in my hand pills at the ready blades calm my soul to keep my hand steady fighting my demons trying to stay fighting alone keeping them at bay days weeks month years Living lies hiding tears broken promises fractured souls i just can't do this anymore.
I'm done with life I’m ready for death. I'm ready for the cold when nothing is left. I'm tired of guilt I'm ready for blame. I'm ready for prize at the end of this game. I've seen family fall i lived through it all, but I'm ready to go back and break down this wall. My life is like a war a battle everyday; I get reinforcements but they never seem to stay. I try so hard to win this war but I've never done anything like this before, everything's new nothings the same. I realized this is an endless game. I need more strength to lift myself up and brush off all this ******* dust. You never know what tomorrow brings, no matter what the bird still sings. The birds might chirp the song still plays; but its still a war in the end of these days.
depressions crazy my thoughts are hazy and the pills refuse to work i want my bed ive lost my head this must be a dream i'm freezing cold my actions are bold time and space seem warped **** these drugs i need a hug with love so far and lost all the eyes mouths spreading lies and i'm being torn apart