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SpecialK Jan 2018
She said love yourself but where do I start
I look deep down within my heart

Something is not there in my soul
Something that only I should behold

I look in the mirror all I see is sadness
This can’t continue this is madness

How can I expect love from someone else
First I must love and respect myself

To repair the damage That ive done
To love myself be my number 1

How do I do this I am unsure
Does anybody know the cure
SpecialK Jan 2018
you were supposed to show me the way in life,
to protect me
show me how I am supposed to be loved by a man correctly
to help me with my homework to make sure I reached my full potential.
you and mum then divorced
your actions then on in were only detrimental
to my future, messed with my emotions
When mum got really ill, I reached out to you
but you rejected me ,really disrespected me
Your daughter, flesh and blood once was the apple of your eye
Thought you would take care of me but all you did was make me cry
U turned you back on me
but im supposed to be your family
But wait you  met someone new.. she already  had 2 kids
ready made family for you
You let me go through the government system that they call foster care
You came and visited me through the holidays maybe here and there
You tell me you didnt have the money to take care of me
but wait
you had money to feed your other family
your blood does not run through their veins
You Mr Should be ashamed
****** , mental, physical abuse and foster care
where were u I needed you there
You left me to suffer but want me to call you dad
That is one thing I can say from the age of 8 I never really had.
We have now come to a cross road
I've adressed you about  your actions
was never expecting that explosion , your reactions
Grow up she says.
you dont know how hard it was you said.
Your mum made it difficult you said
Excuse excuse excuse.
The men that want to be a dad fight with every breath they have.
I gave you an opportunity to put things right
I thought we could have a relationship I thought it was in site.
You slammed the door in my face, rejecting me once again.
Now at the age of 30 all I have are memories, anger and pain
SpecialK Jan 2018
Ip dip me or her
How did I not know my worth

You found me at my lowest eb
Spun me lies and made a web

A period full of deceit
Made me cry made me weep

Now I am strong your egos bruised
I’m no longer here for you to use

I hear the sounds come out your lips
And it’s my *** you can kiss

I found my worth repaired my heart
Now it’s time for a brand new start

One without you involved
You narcacist are out in the cold

— The End —