i'm unsure what i miss more

     you
          or the excuse you gave me to be insane

it took me twenty five years
to realize
all i've really wanted to find in life
is a gentle man
who knows just how to behave
      when i rest my rose-hipped lips
upon his peach-fleshed lobes

          and whisper

     "i'm afraid."

i fall in love a dozen times a day

with lips as they dance on a down-turned face
with the wilting words they say
with that same face
     when it takes the shape of a reaction

you'll get distracted
     when our eyes cross like sci-fi light beams
and it will seem as if i'm looking at you the same way that i bat my lashes through the telescope's lens

          it doesn't depend on much

just that we so happen to share the same space
     and an eerily simular pulse

i remember the day i was born
     all bright light and handshakes

it felt the same on the day that i died

.    ironic
really

          the brain stem controls involuntary movement
     and lies just inside
the flesh that i can't help but check
for the glass and pebbles
     you left behind

there's something in the way in which grown men cry
          that begs us to fall to our knees
     and weep
for the heart ache that we've given to our fathers

i stay awake late
contempleting the possibility of decoding the illustrative lyrics
      spoken between my head and my heart

my wheels keep turnin' circles

     still
it's a start