Hello, I'm writing to myself instead of thinking for the first time in awhile, and I don't know why I'm here, but today, now, I feel truly happy. Happier than I've felt for the first time in awhile. Happy enough to want, even after everything, I'm not stuck anymore. It feels good to say that, I'm happy.

i know what it means to be lonely and un-happy, i know, i know. Know. no. Act happy. i wish you’d hit me till i’m complete rock bottom broke. That’s why. Things are so fake and surreal it’s weird, it makes me feel alone, but reminds me I’m not the only one who’s empty suffocating in irony. People are stupid and awkward like thoughts. - i keep deleting myself because i'm stupid, but i want this to stay.

i feel alone in this world and I love you but all you do is remind me