Judged by your shell
Unsure everyday
In our so called great

I never worried
never had to
You had to
You have to
You live this
You have to
My eyes are opening
My ears are listening
My heart is braking
My voice is starting
I want to scream

I'm not venting
I have no right to
Because I'm not you

But I can listen
We all should listen
Because I forget
I guess we all forgot

I could keep writing
does it mean anything?
Can we hear anything?
We will forget everything again tomorrow
We always do

So sad

Packing for the change
See you soon
Last box, last check
See you soon
Last hugs for a while
See you soon
I'm not ready for last
So see you soon
Goodbye is so final
So I will see you soon
I hated that last box

What else do I have but hope
Smiles reflecting back
brings me hope
Eyes I can not see through
But I still hope
Hoping I can understand
Why are we here today?
Praying still doesn't comprehend
this day today
Helpless with everything
control of nothing
I am all in but helpless
But I still hope

If it looks like ****
Don't touch it
If it smells like it
Move from it
If you step in it
Wave your foot around
Rub it in the grass around
Don't take NO ****.

Father not a
Choice was mine I guess mine
I went with the father
Because brother did
Mom in corner
Crying
Hands held pulling her ankles in
I past her by without a look
I was a man now
I picked what my bro did
Didn't even pause by Mom
I was young
But should have stopped
Hugged. Loved

I stood at her door some time after.
Asking to come in forever.
This little frightened kid.
She smiled as she opened the door.
Your welcome here always son
I stepped in with no judgement
Door closed behind
My heart at ease
I love you Mom.
You just changed my life.

Shadows of voices
I can hardly hear
Breeze through my windows
I thought you were here
Wake with heartbeat racing
But your no where near
I turn, close my eyes

Shadows of voices
Whispers to me
Dad I'm ok.
And I will be
Leave your window open
Feel the breeze
Be at ease Dad

As I look at my child
A not so perfect child but better than I was
I will not harm him father
I will not belittle him father
I will love him forever
I will be all I can be for him
I will not fall short father
I will NOT be you father.
I will be his dad always.
You are his Grand nothing

Saying goodbye for now
Should be easier.
He said see you Thanksgiving.
I wore my sunglasses
I told him I love you
So proud of you.
I wore my sunglasses
I love you too Dad
I wore my sunglasses
We hugged a bit tighter
Parted for now
I walked away
Adjusting my blurry sunglasses

Peering perhaps
Looking into nothing
Missing a kiss on the cheek?
Not really
Missing words that will speak?
Not really
Does that mean I'm alone?
Not really
Content with my own self?
Yes really
Meant to be and will be?
That's silly.

Strong
Independent
Smiles
Forgiving
3 kids
She did it
Alone
She does it
Continues
To do it
One flew now two

My sis
Finally told her
I love you
So proud of you
Why did it take so long
My sis
Strong
Independent
Smiles
With arms wide open.
My Sis
I love you
My Sis

How could I ever write to express my best?
Let me take a picture, let me take a picture

Picture this son.

My life without you would be like a turn to nowhere.
No where wouldn't even matter.
I wouldn't care.
I've already been there

You, my world, my all
My rock, my sun
My boy a man so proud I am
I see my boy but a man looks back at me

Still I see my baby, my joy, my son
I will always see those eyes of yesterday
My man, my boy, my son.

So what makes a great poem?
Tears? Joys?
Writing about nothing!
Struggling to make good of the last line?
Seeking empathy?
Tears joy. Reward?
I seek it all
I fall apart and just write
I write some times when I fall apart

We at the rock
Yeah that one
That big rock
Heated by sun
Beside the calming water
Nothing matters

Meet me at the rock.
Where we first met.
Where we first kissed.
Black coffee, white suger and ocean mist
Laying beside each other in the shade
Where we can just be us.
Under a shade with palms of a tree

Meet me at the rock
My mind’s favorite place to wander,
Because you’re always there
Waiting, welcoming.
Dreaming seeing.
Arms wide open
Words need not spoken

When I close my eyes
I can’t wait to dream
Because no matter the weather
Sunshine will be at the rock.

Meet me at our spot
I will listen to the waves waiting
By that spot, by that rock
By that shade, near that rock.
By that spot where we first met

Thank you father for teaching me.
Your subpar parenting and lack of anything taught me to be a much better man.
You see father I am a Dad.
This accomplishment didn't come from books or any sort of guidance from you father.
It came when my son was born.
I knew that day I would do anything for him. I became a Father and a dad at the same time.
Unfortunately you are just my father.
A lower case father.
An ignorant man not dad
Never am I like you ever
For I am a Dad

Blessed with,
My strengths are what you bring out the best in
I smile when we're texting
With you there's no need for resting
I fight and question,

Where  are you, what am I left with
Had the same goals, you were my best fit
But we were driving the same car and got off at different exits

Some whisper so loud we can not hear
Smiles to hide what's inside
No blurry lines it's clear
I'm ok Mom look I'm here
I will ease my pain when you're not near
No need to worry because I believe
The pain will be gone
All through my being and so on
And so on be gone.
I didn't want you to worry Mom
so I Whispered

I am thankful for my boy
Grateful for the years and joy
Holding you. Comforting you
Teaching you to be now man

I am thankful for mom.
Spread her wings and kept me in
Closed her arms around me.
Everything will be ok son.

I am thankful for a friend that listens
No judgement. Just listens as I listen.

I am thankful for someone I don't know
That writes beautifully for me.

I am thankful for a seed that makes a tree
Growing and giving me shade I may need.

Sitting under leaves as I write.

Perhaps I'm not alone.

For you I would try to make endless rain stop
For you I would shelter you from each drop
For you I would make time stand still
For you if I could I would and will
For you I would put myself second
For you there's nothing less than the best
For you I will do my best
For you always I give no less
For you are my light
For you are my life
For you son
For you are my eyes
My hopes. My joys
My boy. Always
For you

Wake up
Get ready
Work
End of day
Go home
Nap
Wake up
TV...........sleep
Eat in between
Dreams same
Till I wake
Get ready
Work again
No time to think
I'm alone

I tell him everyday
I hug him, I love him
I have broken the cycle
He is my all Mom
I know I am to you
So tell me you love me
I would melt in your arms
Mom please
I know you do
I just need to hear it.

Most things I write don't take more than 10
No proof read, no backspace no begin again
No should I post or break out red pen
This is me. This is my 10

I often think what could be
I mean a think is just today for me
But thoughts sometimes blind me
Think covers my eyes I can not see
Flavors on my pallet with sweet and sour
Lessons to be told and learned
Trust to be earned
Drag along passed many things
Too much to pull along
Makes you think what you passed along
Along the way while thinking
Like a blink of a thing passed in the wind
I think too often
I think I will stop.

Mom you made me smile so many times
Mom you gave me hope when i was blind
Mom you conforted that little child
Mom spread her arms
Mom I am the man today
Mom because of you that day
Mom at your door so lost
Son come in

******* on it.
Sticky page
Rub your fingers on it
Separate
Peel to the left
Right has past
Blank page is left
Write it at last

I read some
I'm out of my league here
I vent with words so some can hear
Possible what I write
Is highschool writes
Compared to my reads here
Still I will Penn as clear
As I can
I will read and learn it
I will understand your work
This basic poet

Im still looking for the Zzzzzzz's
Can you believe?
Still looking for that line that breaks reality.
That sleep that brings
Many things. Of many things
It could take me or be with me
A silent passing of what is
or what could be
Close my eyes my body falls
What will a dream mean to me
I fall and pass reality
Fast asleep to fast awake
To slow to think what's in front of me

Hope is like this amazing thing
A silent wind.
Breathes on my face.
Coming from a place unknown
Sit still and listen as it is blown
Like silent as a bird
Flying by
Sit and listen
Close your eyes
Breeze passes with some answers
Sit and listen and hope

Letters in a specific order make words
Words from the letters
Arranged in an order make a sentence
I will arrange my letters
I will arrange my words
I will do so for me
I hope you can see them

I write not better than here
I hear. I see. I will learn.
Format is nothing.
Letters making a word is nothing
Putting those letters into a word
Is everything.
Writing for me is all the things
Release that brings
My everything.

The new baby is just a question in mind
That will be answered at the given time
Will it be a boy or a girl?
Well there's no right or wrong.
Just let it be happy
Healthy and strong
A day, week, a month, another year old
My brother? My sister?
With my half of mold
I know you'll be happy
And I will be too
So when you come don't be scared
I'll protect you

Imagine if yesterday was today.
What you would know.
What things you could change.
What tomorrow could bring.
Tomorrow would be today
If it was yesterday.
Imagine

Loving my boy.
Bullets I would step, be first
Of course.
Lay down for my only. My first
See only your dreams my thirst.
My boy I love you for sure.
Looking through your eyes
No blurr
Dad is here.
Forever more
For sure

Wind whispers through my ears.
Where did it start?
Where did it begin?
Whispers crying, smiling
Sunsets and despair
Can you imagine? Can you hear
Breeze passes with passed winds
Blowing passed
Can you hear?
Heart aches and tears?
Happiness and love?
That breeze brings
Nothing if you do not hear
Can you hear?
Can you stand and enjoy the breeze?
Feel the wind like i hear?
Stand still and listen to the breeze that whispers
in your ear.
The wind on my face brings a past of unclear.
Still i try to hear.
As the wind whispers in my ear

Did you ever feel more for someone then yourself?
Like a something inside but outside your self. Like a power inside when you look outside. Do i make just a sense for myself?
One must feel that other then me.
Like a seed grows a tree.
Like a sun burning through a cloud.
A whisper that is so loud.
A breeze that brings many things.
That breeze on my face brought to me. Flowing smiles from far away.
Crying loss from yesterday.
Blowing breeze i feel on my face.
That breeze passes on to the next.
Do you see it like I do?
Smell that breeze where did it come from??? What passion did it bring?
What memories of all things?
Did you ever feel more for someone then yourself?
Whispers hit my face through the breeze.
I hear them loud and clear.
My breeze will not stay here.
Wind blows to the next and blows to the next ........ forever listening can you hear?

Life's road is long, lefts could be wrong.
Stay straight? no chances.
Chance could be gone.
A rights a right, not always right.
Mistakes are made........u-turns in life.
Regroup and start a road thats straight.
Come turns again?
Make your life great.

Never did I.
Imagain that I
Could love like I
For someone
So young was I
Waiting was I
A cry brought smiles.
Tears to my eyes.
Bottle with you
We both fell asleep
Druel on my shoulder
Memories I keep
Waking up
In that chair
In my arms forever
I still picture us there.