I tried suicide
Mom didn't like it that much
I'm better off dead

I grabbed a string
And tied it around my neck
Made it tighter
And tighter
Until I couldn't breathe
Threw one end over my door
And pulled
I wear a red line on my neck
Almost had blue lips
Almost died
But my mom
Found me
And cut it off
I wish she never did

Last night I was in pain
I cut my crushes' name onto my stomach
I tried hanging myself
on 2/11/25
and my friend reported me
to the administrators
and I tried the lifeline
they couldn't help

suicide kills
literally
but the only thing it will **** tonight
is me
only me
nobody else
no hotline can save me
no crush can force me out of it
if I die trying to live
then why die?
a touch to my skin
a purr from your mouth
my life is used up like a pencil
dull and small
soon it will be used up one last time
and be gone forever

Stab in the side
                    Make me cry
        Stab in the foot
                     Yes, it hurt
     Bruises on my arms
              Don't be alarmed
         Cuts on my wrist
                    Add it to the list
          Burned my chest
               Definitely not the best
                                Lies on the side
                                    Laws to abide
           Tonight I'll die
With a ****** knife at my side

I haven't written in a while
Because I was with the suicide hotline
I lost my device
And my love with it too
So I am glad to be back
Writing my feelings
My thoughts
And words

A gentle touch to my skin
  You've won me, again
    We met on Magma, a digital art website
      But I didn't know you would abuse me
        My body trembled as you started to flirt
           And I wish that I never heard
              You sent pictures and messages
                 That I didn't want
                   And then you found out my name, my address, my home
                       You flew from Virginia, finding me here
                          And you took me, kidnapped me
                              You did things to me that I didn't want
                                 And I wanted to die
                                But you kept going
                               Scarring me for life
                              I ran away trying to live
                             Didn't bother to take my shirt
                            I thought to myself
                           Why is my life like this
                          I reported him, got him banned
                        But he found me again, threatening me
                      That he would **** me if I didn't do what he wanted
                     I said no, and he pinned me down
                    Breathing down my neck
                   With a knife in his hand
                  He said he wouldn't hurt me if I took everything off
                 But I still said no
                He forced my clothes off and did what he wanted
               Leaving my body alone
              He then yelled to me
             And said "Did you think we were done?"
            I said yes, and started to run
           He came for me, catching me
          Then he took the knife
        And stabbed it into my side
       I had to follow him or my heart would've been next
      But this abuse I have experienced
     Was the worst one yet
    He threw me to the curb
   With no clothes
  But still, I ran
Ran home
To the home I knew