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Feb 2021 · 649
Complicated
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
People say I'm complicated,
But If they see close enough,
I'm not that complicated
I just stay away from people,
Because I don't want to hurt myself.
I don't talk much,
Because talking doesn't make the pain go.
Im heartless,they say!
But the mask is too strong for them to see my true self!
Why don't you love anyone?
Because love hurts like hell.
Why don't you make friends?
Because friends can break your heart too.
I'll always say;"I'm Fine"
Even in the worst times
Because explaining your pain is kuch harder than faking a smile.
The show will go on,
It must never end
Until death comes in the way...!!
Not so good and incomplete caz this was one of my first poems and it's been incomplete for years and I just don't want to complete it!!
Feb 2021 · 92
TIRED
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
Would it be fine
If I let go?
Will everything be right,
Only if I'm gone?
Is it okay for me to let go?
Is it really necessary to make everything right?
Do I really have to let go?
Will I be able to live without it?
All I want is to be happy!
But, do I deserve happiness?
Do I deserve love?
Am I really worth it?
I don't know.....!
Would anything change
If I'm gone forever?
Will I affect anybody?
Will everything be right?
But,
Will it ever......!!
#suicide #mental-illness #GE
#dying
Feb 2021 · 85
WONDER
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
Sometimes I wonder,
When will this pain end?
When will this craziness end?
When will I stop eating those medicines?
When will I get rid of it?
When will I be normal?
Would there be a moment like this;
Where I'll have no pain, no craziness
Only happiness and joy
But then,
Realization and Reality
hits my mind
And reminds me that
I'll never be normal,
The pain will never end,
The craziness won't **,
I can never stop eating those medicines.
Even after all this,
I still wish for all this
**** to end,
For this never-ending pain
Pain to leave me and
Go far away from me!
But,
Will it ever???
#mental-illness.  #patient. #sick&tired
#dead
Feb 2021 · 121
For you
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
To all those people being bullied

- To all those people who have lost a loved one

- To all those people who have lost a pet

- To all those people being abused

- To all those people going through depression

- To all those people with anxiety

- To all those people in poverty

- To all those people going through a breakup

- To all those people having a bad day

- To all those people with insecurities

- To all those people just having a hard time



Don’t forget

- Your weakness today

- Is your strength tomorrow

- It always gets better

- Your loved ones will remain in your hearts

- You always have the memories

- Love yourself

- Stand up for yourself

- Money can’t buy happiness

- Those lovers

- Just weren’t right

- Don’t abuse yourself

- Don’t abuse others

- **** them with kindness

- Treat people with kindness

- We’ve all had these times

- There will always be a hole in our chests



But

- Let’s all be each others’ strength

- whether you’re

- Black

- White

- LGBTQ+

- Christian

- Atheist

- Etc



- Love yourself

- Love others

- Don’t cut

- Don’t ****

- Don’t criticize

- Don’t beg

- Don’t do drugs

- Don’t starve yourself

- Don’t starve others



We aren’t supposed to do any of that

- Just keep your strength

- Keep your faith

- Don’t change because you were told to

- Be yourself

- Sometimes playing a character isn’t the best thing to do. Have a great day and don’t stop spreading awareness about things that are happening currently in the world .
#burst-of-motivation-out-of-nowhere
#be-happy
#love-yourself
Feb 2021 · 170
Reasons to live
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
“Suicide doesn’t stop the pain,” “It gives it to someone else.”

- [ ] 1: We would miss you

- [ ] 2: It’s worth it to be alive

- [ ] 3: It does get better, believe it or not it will eventually get better.

- [ ] 4: There’s so much you would miss out on doing.

- [ ] 5: You are worth it don’t let anyone, even yourself tell you otherwise.

- [ ] 6: God made you for a reason, you have a reason.

- [ ] 7: There is always a reason to live!

- [ ] 8: So many people care about you

- [ ] 9: You are amazing

- [ ] 10: I don’t even know you and I love you

- [ ] 11: I care for you

- [ ] 12: There are plenty of people that love you

- [ ] 13: You're literally perfect!! <3

- [ ] 14: There are plenty of people that care for you

- [ ] 15: God loves you

- [ ] 16: God cares about you

- [ ] 17: Sometimes life is hard but it will make you a stronger person don’t worry!

- [ ] 18: What about all the things you’ve always wanted to do? What about all the things you’ve planned, but never got around doing? You can’t do them if your dead.

- [ ] 19: I want you to be alive

- [ ] 20: So many people want you alive!

- [ ] 21: You won’t be able to listen to Music if you die

- [ ] 22: You’ll never be able to listen to your favourite song if you die.

- [ ] 23: You’ll never be able to listen to your favourite singer if you’re gone

- [ ] 24: You’ll never be able to listen to your favourite rapper if you’re gone.

- [ ] 25: listening to really loud music

- [ ] 26: Killing yourself is never worth it, you’ll hit both yourself & the people who care about you.

- [ ] 27: There are so many people that would miss you, including me

- [ ] 28: the clouds

- [ ] 29: You are gorgeous

- [ ] 30: Someone out there would die for you :’)

- [ ] 31: How do you think your family would feel?

- [ ] 32: Proving people wrong with your success.

- [ ] 33: Watching the jerks that doubted you fail at life.

- [ ] 34: You’ll never have the feeling of walking into a warm building on a cold day.

- [ ] 35: You’ll never have the feeling of walking into a cold building on a hot day.

- [ ] 36: Being stupid in public just because you can.

- [ ] 37: Helping other people.

- [ ] 38: You have a future to live for..

- [ ] 39: Being alive is good

- [ ] 40: thinking about happy memories

- [ ] 41: Finding your soulmate.

- [ ] 42: All nighters!!!

- [ ] 43: Sleeping in all day

- [ ] 44: You can look back at yourself later in your life and be glad you didn’t commit suicide.

- [ ] 45: Nobody could ever replace you

- [ ] 46: You’re unique

- [ ] 47: pets

- [ ] 48: petting pets

- [ ] 49: Netflix and movies

- [ ] 50: Decorating the Christmas tree

- [ ] 51: Dreams that make you smile

- [ ] 52: Breakfast in bed

- [ ] 53: New clothes

- [ ] 54: New shoes

- [ ] 55: New books

- [ ] 56: Sunrises and Sunsets

- [ ] 57: Friends

- [ ] 58: The ocean

- [ ] 59: Sunlight

- [ ] 60: Your family

- [ ] 61: Inside jokes

- [ ] 62: Birthdays

- [ ] 63: Christmas

- [ ] 64: Family traditions

- [ ] 65: The taste of your favourite food

- [ ] 66: Favourite tv show

- [ ] 67: Favourite movie

- [ ] 68: Going to new places

- [ ] 69: The ability to peruse what ever you choose (there are over 7 billion people on Earth, don’t be afraid to be you)

- [ ] 70: To earn money and rewards

- [ ] 71: You can always flip your life around.

- [ ] 72: To find the perfect job/career for you

- [ ] 73: Pizza

- [ ] 74: Kittens

- [ ] 75: New haircuts

- [ ] 76: Moments you can look back to and laugh at

- [ ] 77: The clouds

- [ ] 78: The world is better with you in it

- [ ] 79: Roller Coasters

- [ ] 80: Showers

- [ ] 81: Cake

- [ ] 82:Growing old

- [ ] 83: Growing old with the person you love

- [ ] 84: Singing

- [ ] 85: Sleeping

- [ ] 86: Icecream

- [ ] 87: Cookies

- [ ] 88: food in general

- [ ] 89: Movie nights

- [ ] 90: Candy

- [ ] 91: Popcorn

- [ ] 92: Daydreaming

- [ ] 93: Happy moments

- [ ] 94: Halloween

- [ ] 95: Sleepovers

- [ ] 96: Parties

- [ ] 97: Having a good personality

- [ ] 98: Making people happy

- [ ] 99: Bonfires

- [ ] 100: Sitting on rooftops

- [ ] 101: Vacations

- [ ] 102: Hearing crazy stories

- [ ] 103: Telling crazy stories

- [ ] 104: Treehouses

- [ ] 105: Starbucks

- [ ] 106: You’ve changed someone’s life

- [ ] 107: If you’re gone how will you achieve great things?

- [ ] 108: Everyone has talent including you

- [ ] 109: Eating crazy food

- [ ] 110: Hanging out with your friends

- [ ] 111: Nobody could ever replace you

- [ ] 112: You have so much to live for

- [ ] 113: Your dreams need some fulfilling to do

- [ ] 114: Living life to the fullest

- [ ] 115: Heck, I would miss you like crazy

- [ ] 116: Your family and friends would be devastated if you were gone

- [ ] 117: Someone out there is constantly praying to meet someone like you

- [ ] 118: Your future

- [ ] 119: You could save so many lives

- [ ] 120: You are too beautiful to disappear

- [ ] 121: You are bigger than any of your problems

- [ ] 122: You are never alone during this struggle

- [ ] 123: Tomorrow is a new day!

- [ ] 124: You are worth more than you think

- [ ] 125: Last but not least, the final and most important one is, just being able to experience life, because even if your life doesn’t seem so great right now, anything could happen
#dont-hurt-yourself
#dont-****-yourself
#live-a-little-more
Feb 2021 · 195
Numb
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
Today i feel....
Abandond
Ugly
Hurt
Like i dont matter
Useless
Invisible
Like i dont belong
Numb
Not worthy of love
Unappreciated
Hopeless

Wait i feel like this everyday💔
#just wanna die
Feb 2021 · 833
I’m sorry
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
I'm sorry for being a bad daughter
I'm sorry for being a bad friend
I'm sorry for being a bad sister
I'm sorry for being a bad student
I'm sorry for being not strong enough
I'm sorry for failing
I'm sorry for giving up
I'm sorry for not being able to tell you
I'm sorry for telling you like this
I'm sorry for not seeing another solutions
I'm sorry for not believing you that you love me
I'm sorry for my mind, don't letting me sleep for weeks
I'm sorry for not being there, when you need it
I'm sorry for complaining
I'm sorry for being weak
I'm sorry for being not worth it
I'm sorry for being so stupid
I'm sorry for thinking I could do it
I'm sorry for even trying
I'm sorry for being to sad
I'm sorry for being to happy
I'm sorry for lying
I'm sorry for the nights you wasted to me
I'm sorry for blaming you
I'm sorry for not being able to clean up in my head
I'm sorry for saying I love you
I'm sorry for everything
I'm sorry for my mind
I'm sorry for the things I said
I'm sorry for wasting your time
I'm sorry for being late
I'm sorry for wasting Money
I'm sorry for seeking attention
I'm sorry for begging
I'm sorry for being a mess
I'm sorry for my thoughts
I'm sorry for being lazy
I'm sorry for being loud
In sorry for loving
I'm sorry for hating
I'm sorry for being annoying
I'm sorry for being to jealous
I'm sorry for comparing
I'm sorry for stop trying
I'm sorry for existing
I'm sorry for breathing
I'm sorry for living
I'm sorry
I'm so sorry
#tired-of-this-life.  
#don't-wanna-Love-anymore
Feb 2021 · 222
A deep sentence
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
Tears are words that need to be written....!
Feb 2021 · 132
Favorite Quote
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
Please love me more than I hate myself.....!💔💔
Feb 2021 · 109
Night vibe
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
Loving you was losing me.....!!💔💔
Feb 2021 · 138
💔Hurt💔
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
The words didn’t hurt me,
The person who said them did.....!,
#broken #hurt #lonely
Feb 2021 · 105
Quote
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
Every time you hurt me so bad ,
That the PAIN lost its meaning......!!!💔💀💔💔
#never-ending-pain    #hurt.      #lonely-hurt
Feb 2021 · 115
Half-loved
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
I’m not enough
I know,
so let me go.
It hurts to be
Half-loved......!!!💔💔💔
#one-sided-love.  #broken
Feb 2021 · 101
Quote
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
The things you hide in your heart.........
Eats you alive...!!💔💔💔
#alone
#lonely
#broken
Feb 2021 · 107
Depression
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
Laying on my bed
In my empty room;
Asking myself why
I’m feeling so doomed,
Seeing people around me
Shining in happiness,
But why don’t I feel
A single smile on my face
I ask myself everyday
Why am I feeling this way,
Am I not normal?
Am I not okay?
I cry without reasons,
Every single night
Feeling like an empty
Soul without a life.
I never need a reason
To have tears in my eyes
Like sadness is a normal
Feeling in my life,
Am I the only one
who feels this way?
Am I not normal?
Am I not OKAY.....??
#done-living
#dead already
#inside-dead
Feb 2021 · 410
A new you
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
Maybe you aren’t you because  you’re trying to be who you were before the trauma, that person doesn’t exist anymore, because there’s a new you that’s trying to be born! Breathe life into that person!
Just reminding everybody that don’t be too ******* yourself!
No matter what you deserve love and respect!
#self-love #love-yourself
Feb 2021 · 257
Quote
Hooria Iftikhar Feb 2021
I killed my own happiness in such a young age,
By loving someone more than myself.......!!💔💔
Jan 2021 · 104
😞😞SADNESS😞😞
Hooria Iftikhar Jan 2021
They say happiness will find you,
But I think sadness find you too.
It sneaks up on you in darkness,
Just when you thing you’ve made it through
It opens hole in what was solid ground,
That kind you never knew was there.
Until you go to take another step
And find out you’re standing over thin air,
The world around you passes by,
In blue of colors and sounds,
Nothing around you makes any sense
As you continue your plummet down
You can’t remember how it started
And you don’t know when will it end,
But you know you’d give anything
To stand up on your feet.
Sadness is that feeling
When the falling doesn’t stop,
And it eats up the meaning of your life
And all the good things that you’ve got,
And finally you look back at the sky
What you had once seems so far away now,
The only things left to do is cry
All people yell out “save yourself”
Calling things about happiness and hope
But they’re too busy in their lives to realize
It would be a lot quicker if
They’d let down a rope........!
Hope happiness comes soon............!
Happy new year!
Hooria Iftikhar Jan 2021
Please, tell me not to cry
Please don’t say there was a reason why
You don’t know what I am feeling
Or how much I am hurt,
The wet spots are from tears on the collar of the shirt
You think I should go on with life,
Forget about it and be strong?
But deep down I’m sad, and I don’t want to go along!
I don’t expect you to understand why
For no apparent reason, I break down and start to cry
My life has changed forever, you see
And that’s why I’m not acting like the old me
So, please don’t try to act like nothing happened
Because it changed my life forever
I’ll never be the same again,
Not today, not tomorrow but never
The best thing you can do for me is just be there
Just like always dear,
My broken heart is hurting hard
And it’ll never mend.......!
I wrote this when I was at my lowest and just needed somebody beside me so yea........hope u like it!

— The End —