they say time is precious
so don't waste yours on me
not me, never me
we're all getting tired of me
so wrap your time
and fold it into a napkin
with your name and number
so at least i can hover
over your contact at 4am
pretending you would pick up
if i ever called
i'm either too close or too distant
either obsessed or disinterested
i'm rapidly switching between extremes
but for some reason
i've never grown tired of you

for once, someone left me
before i could leave them.

i prematurely miss you,
dreading the day i no longer know you,
the day your heart no longer beats for me,
the day you no longer kiss my forehead
and twirl my hair around your finger
absentmindedly.
i dread the day you no longer tell me
“i love you”
at least 10 times a day,
(just in case i forget)
the day you no longer write poetry
inspired by me,
the day you no longer want to grow up and start a life in the city together,
grow old and live out one life together.
i dread the absence
of my name in your mouth,
your cologne in my sheets,
my clothes on your floor.
i dread the day
i no longer know you.
-a.c.b