The night is a monster
I've learned to love so dearly
Only because before then
I could never stay awake to see its beauty
Now I can rest my arms
I can rest my legs
But I can't rest my head
Because there is where it's awake the most
With thoughts swimming through my brain
I've only come to sleep during the times
When I've become numb
And it feels as though I'm all bone
Now I know to just look at the stars
I'll see my past
My future
And I'll think of the present
And I'll finally know that I can slow
Everything down
If I just go to where I belong
In the night sky
Where the stars hold my thoughts
And the moon becomes my soul

Across a room he played; there were no lyrics. Just chords not formed into a melody.
Across a room she stared out a window reluctant to congregate into conversation with society. Her thoughts screaming over the voices.
Only they thought they'd never become what they'd became. With each day passing by and the crowd growing so little would the chance come.
Across a room someone had just caught his eye. How many times had she'd been there? How many more times would he have to catch her attention... If only he could cross the room and speak.
Across the room from the corner of her eyes was a haze of a shadow. If only she could clear her mind, to see if maybe it's all just a daydream. How many more thoughts would keep her eyes from being clear.
Only would time ever see; to unfold a story of where only a set of strangers could ever meet. In the different views of their beliefs.
Across the room he played. He played, and he played. Hoping to catch her gaze he played the notes to form a melody. Hoping she'd decode the notes, so he wouldn't need to speak.
Across the room where only silence was heard did a new experience peak. A glorious melody she heard. A little out of tune but so perfectly imperfect it was hard to believe.
As they looked into each other's gaze they finally noticed. Something was there but what was being said. Only their souls could tell.
Across the room he looked up at the girl who was beyond his reach. The last chord came close and it was almost the end of the show. His hope was dwindling down to her wishes for an encore.
Across the room she tried once more to clear her mind. The mere shadow isn't what her mind tricks her to believe. She knows the notes and she can see the message in her head, if only she could see.
With the last light growing dull and his fingers growing tired had her vision become clear. He looked across a room so familiar to him one more to find she was no longer there. She gazed at him from the edge of a seat pulled in front of the stage where he sat on the edge.
Across a room so clear she abandoned a corner where she dwelled away from society. His melody so imperfectly perfect could she finally see. He could not speak.
Their eyes had a conversation across a room and the time has passed where they couldn't tell if tomorrow was today or yesterday.
In the front of the room was a couple that even though unlikely was a fatal match. He made melodies in place of words he couldn't speak and she finally spoke the thoughts that were killing.

On this porch I feel like reminiscing.
With an old friend about all the times we've shared.
It's a bitter winter night and the clouds on my breath hold a scent so familiar.
All those empty promises, the shared cigarettes that burnt the cement between you and I.
Kisses with nicotine breaths, burning cigarettes between our lips as we played cards.
War would be played for hours on end. Till we realized that there was no cigarette to calm these waves of emotions that overflow within us.
Last year on a night like this we were bundle in a blanket talking about where we'd be a year from then.
Apparently neither of us were close to the truth.
Our last cigarette is still crumbled in the Altoids Ash tray.
I'm here on this porch with an old friend, and you're not here to share this moment with me.
A bottle of ***** and some cigarettes are here to help me forget.
That this old friend is my worse enemy, but I can't seem to shake the feeling that maybe till death do us part is all a lie.
Because in this moment it has never seemed that you and I aren't so far apart if death could only come and take me as well.

One day.
The stars will fall,
They will collide.
The sun will set,
And the moon will fall.
Everything will become silent.
My mind will wander,
To distant dreams,
And my nightmares will perish.
Death will no longer be an obligation.
Living won't be a choice.
A free spirit,
My eyes will be open,
And I won't be vulnerable
To these demons.
The clouds will be beneath me
And I will be free.
I will be infinite;

Please don't leave.
There's something that's killing and all I need is you.
Just to hold me.

Say what you want but I'm terrified.
There's so much I want to say to you but I panic.
All I need is to talk to you.

To sense your presence.
I want to hide from you at the same time.
These feelings, how easily they show when you're near it scares me.
You scare me in a good way.

Please I'm quivering,
Can I just stay in your arms?
There's so much inside me that hurts.
I have all the pieces together but can you just keep them in place.

My mind is soothed when I'm with you.
The world becomes cleared, the nightmares settles into a dream, everything that kills me.
Dies away when you hold me.

So please can I just stay?
Right here in your arms, where everything feels safe.

If the darkness is to paint itself on the glistening horizon as the sky turns to all different hues.
Then how come we can't rid ourselves of the skeletons in our closets?
The Angels in our dreams are drowning as the monsters under our beds pull us from our sleep.
When life creates the most extraordinary things, that death will always hold close. We can't create peace, but the impossible is seemingly possible if we were to only try.

When you asked me how many times I've fallen in love.
I never told you the entire truth because this time around
The truth sounds as a lie.
Once was the amount I gave you, and you knew that you were the one I was talking about.

I've fallen in love a countless amount of times.
In ways in which wouldn't be considered true.

Such as the way in which you guard yourself,
The ways in which a smile will dance across your face,
The way your eyes always hold a secret I have the desire to find,

How your hands always seem to find the crevices in mine to fit ever so gently,
In which your hair is so easy to become messy,
The way you laugh,
Even the ways in which you read,

How your handwriting is a sloppy scribble that I love to decode,
The sound of your voice when it's dripping with sarcasm,
The ways in which you discuss your favorite things it's as if a child on  Christmas morning,

I've fallen in love with all the small things.
I've fallen in love a countless amount of times;
Always with the same person.

Everyday there's something new I discover;
That I'll find myself falling in love all over again,
And it's always with you.

Between a million words,
Twenty-six letters in the Alphabet
There isn't anything that could truly come to comprehend our story.
Where it all begins
Or where it all ends.
How can I never the find the right words to tell you everything.
How come you always say so little but it always seems to be so much more to me.
There's no conflicts but our disagreements on something meaningless.
There's more to us then what it seems.
If only I could tell this story in such a way
That there'd be no words left unsaid.

The pictures made out of clouds.
During the afternoons in which we lied in the grass,
Pointing towards the sky,
Interpreting an artist who's passed work.
Just like their paintings in the museums.
Forever painted in my memory,
As we pointed towards the darkening sky.

Down these hallow halls,
With walls scattered with frames
Full of pictures with shattered glass
All but one.
My feet bruised and ******,
Yet I feel numb to the pain.
So I keep standing in front of this little frame.
The one that causes me overwhelming pain.
Surrounded by memories the picture in this frame,
that tears me apart inside.
It's of you.

When I sat on the piano,
While you played beautifully as I watched you with such curiosity.
How did a person like you end up with a person like me?
Towards the end you promised me that you'd never leave me.
A pinky promise that meant the world to me was captured on film of your promise.

Here I stand feeling the glass under my hand.
Tears spilling down my makeup stained cheeks,
As the one thought consuming me spills from my lips.
'Will you always be a picture on my wall?'
I need you here,
But you can't be with me.

The way you kissed me without warning,
Without my permission,
Stealing my breath.
I never knew these feelings until I met you.
Now I can't be the same person I was before.
Because with you I was the person I'd always wanted to be.
I was me.

I built my walls brick by brick,
Wore a suit of armor only for you to stumble carelessly and rid me of my defenses.
You didn't steal my heart.
You asked for it politely and I trusted it into your care.
Now because of you I can't feel my heartbeat.
I don't exist completely without you
And you promised me.
Now I'm on my own,
But I can't let you go.

Six feet under and your cold hands still hold my heart completely.
I never wanted this, and it came so unexpectedly.
How can you become just a memory?
You lived among these walls in tiny pieces.
Scattered your heart around our house,
And I'm searching to put together the puzzle.
Trying to put your heart back together so you can return to me.

Because I can't let you just become a picture on my wall.
I won't let you become a memory.
You will always be a missing a piece of me;
The one that I need to breathe.

Our fingers calloused from the instruments we played.
Our minds running through the constant staffs and scores.
The music pouring out of our souls, and the gathering of us all.

Of the different musicians in different genres and instruments.
It's enough to create a small home where we can all be free.

To play till our fingers bleed,
To sing till we've lost our breathes,
To listen to music all day,
To never have to worry about anything other then when our instruments need tuning.

In this tiny piece of sanctuary can I finally say that the music saved me.

It's not such a simple thing to explain.

How the sun rises in the most beautiful way everyday,
How the moon never truly leaves the sky after midnight,
How the stars become hidden by the blue sky and clouds everyday.
Even though they're hard to find they're still there.

Or how when walking through a crowd I'm hoping somehow you'll find me.
I know I'm not the most beautiful, and I'm probably not that makes you truly happy.
But give this a shot is all I'm asking.
I'll teach you my ways and you can teach me yours.
Share this piece of yourself with me and I'll do the same.

It's not such a simple thing to explain,
But just let everything drop and realize that no matter what.
I'll always be right here waiting and I hope you don't mind but I'd be happy if you'd do the same.

In this tranquil room you ask where I want to start.
You know how this all started but not how it ends.

So I'll begin from there, because if I think of all the moments we shared in reverse.
It no longer hurts.

If I rewind our story you slowly fade out of my head and there's room for someone new.
So when you ask me where I want to start.

Can we start at the beginning of the end?

They say pictures capture a thousand words. But what about a thousand moments?
There's a picture of you and I.
It's my favorite but it only captures a moment. The picture itself is beautiful but how it was taken is what steals my breathe away.
You were trying to make me smile, and I was trying to hide my laughter.
Then you caught me off guard.
Brought me to your arms and held me.
Shaking with laughter you had someone take a picture.
I've never been one for the camera but this wasn't the same.
It wasn't posed, it wasn't framed.
It was real.
Between you and I.
There's no words for this moment out of a thousand.
That takes away my ability to breathe.

Even if the world comes crashing down
I'll still be holding you from here on out;
Just as the stars collapse to the earth
I promise I won't let go.
Not even if death were to part me
I'd still be holding your hand ever so tightly.
Because cold hands can only ever belong to a warm heart.

Cracks in the streets that I roam.
The snow has covered the land in a blanket but I only see red.
Red the color of the jacket you wore because you hated coats, red the color of your cheeks and nose when we'd stay outside too long, red the color of the fire when we'd stay at home.
Red the color of your blood staining the snow.
A memory I cannot escape;
Blue the color of your gloves, blue the color of the morning sky, blue the color of our hot chocolate mugs.
Blue the color of your lips.
The ones I can no longer kiss;
White like the stars in the night sky,
White of the marshmallows in our drinks,
White like how the snowflakes fell.
White the color of your skin when I found you;
These streets with cars flying by as though time could never catch up.
How I yearn to run away but something keeps me here.
I've searched every corner of the place we called home.
Upturned every stone, every paper, and even the one place I'd never wanted to see you be.
Case closed, a ****** in the winter that no one could ever solve.
There's a missing piece and I don't think I can leave until I know that you rest in peace.
But for now it's winter, and I can't stop seeing red in the snow.
Smashed in my car window,
Threw out the stereo,
And as the bitter wind kisses my cheek.
I've slipped, and caught myself before but this time.
I can't get up for all I see is red, and I can taste the blood filling my lungs.
Here in this snow.
Where winter will never be the same.

Throughout our journey I've come across a thousand different beautiful things.
And than there's a light inside of you. So bright and endearing that none of these beautiful things compare to such a light.
Nothing can hold such elegance. With words that can't comprehend to explain, how you belong in the sun.
Out of all these beautiful sights, you're the one I can say ignited something within me.

Growing up I was told stories of love and life.
Of princesses who were swept off their feet by their princes,
A world of castles and dungeons.
With dragons and horse drawn carriages.
That whenever you met the person you were meant to be with that your heart would race, palms would sweat, and knees would go weak.
Or that you'd feel calm, no anxieties or insecurities.
I've slowly realized that the fantasy stories aren't real and that princes are not the ones to be looking for.
That when you love someone completely it's not always how physically close you are with them as people assume it to be.
It's when silence isn't awkward it's peaceful and comforting. To know when words aren't needed is a powerful thing.
How their laugh can just make the darkest days become the best.
To be able to talk like best friends but know that this is something more to each other.
That you can trust the other with anything. It's not a word taken lightly when you love someone.
A lesson well learned by many.
But I believe that no matter how long you've been with someone that when you fall in love with someone.
You know. It's not something you just assume. You truly and honestly know from the bottom of your heart that you love them.
The best feeling is knowing they feel the same.
They're not royalty but they're all you need and more.
That's the difference between the stories and reality.

I'm curious to know.
How much you wonder
about me.
Because I'm curious to know
You a little bit better too.
These trees hide my secrets
But never keep them.
They are blown away in the wind.
Do you hear them?
If you just listen you can hear them.
I can't hear yours.
But can you hear mine?
Just listen to the breeze,
Between the trees.

Play these broken keys, and create a beautiful melody.
That will put the heavens to sleep, and hell at ease.

If broken pianos can still play such a harmonious tune then why are you ripping your music apart.

Note by note,
Staff by staff,
Why?

.

You've created such a masterpiece that I've been trying to put back together.
The music that fills your lungs is stealing my breath.

It's alright though because you deserve it, and while I put back together music.

Note by note,
Staff by staff,
Then did you tell me.

That its not the music that's ripped.
Or the broken piano keys,

But the creator.

He holds a gun,
Fully loaded,
She holds pills,
Not a prescription,
He holds a rope,
Hung from the ceiling,
She is plugging her nose,
Never liked water anyway,
He holds a razor,
Newly sharpened,
She holds a knife,
From the kitchen,
They share the same fate.
He’s afraid of the trigger,
She’s afraid of what awaits,
He hates splinters,
She never learned how to swim,
He didn’t want to see the vain,
She never heard a heartbeat,
All afraid,
Where were you?
See… Nobody thinks twice,
“Words can’t hurt me.”
Well it hurt them,
Who are these people?
He’s a straight A student,
She’s the head cheerleader,
He’s the top ****,
She’s Miss America,
He’s the boy that gets beat up at school,
She is a lonely echo in the dark, Nobody thought twice,
Nobody looked back,
Their fate was written,
They all knew each other,
Now they understand… Why some people begged to die.

Driving myself insane throughout my mind.
Among the stars.
Where I once felt as though I'd belonged.

Have I lost my place among this vast sky?
I used to just hide,
But it soon became a home.

Do you see me?
I'll rearrange these stars to create a map.
That'll lead you to where I'm truly hiding.

I stomped on an ember from the fire only to realize
I'd made a fire inside my heart.
Hoping you would notice
That for you to fuel me.
And we'd create a flame that would put all of hell to shame.

Where do the unanswered questions lie?
Buried deep inside our minds do they hide?
Do they haunt us with endless curiosity?
The questions that haven't been asked because we're trembling at the thought of what the answer may be.
Searching for something that could  give us a reason as to why we're here, but what if we're only here so we'll never know why we were placed here?
We've created so many things with only our bare hands.
We've destroyed entire cities with our bare hands in less then a day.
We've only began to reconstruct our creations and repeat the cycle of these ways.
Creation, destruction, and reconstruction.
When can we realize the errors of our ways?
If only we could stop and try to find an answer.
Among all these unanswered questions.

I could write and write for days
On end
But never would these words
Even begin to explain
The thoughts that scream inside my head.

How far can I fall?
This distance that lies between us.
Fades when I just see you
In my dreams.
Where I can be free to dream a dream
Where we fall in love and our lives move together in a beautiful harmony.
The moon breathes a melody and the stars sing a beautiful tune in harmony.
I believe it was created to be for you and me.
How far can you be?
If I see you everyday
This distance isn't physical, it's emotional.
You could talk for hours,
We could do nothing
All day.
I'd never be bored and I hope you wouldn't either.
This isn't something I can ignore.
I'm falling and I'm only hoping.
You can catch me.

Nobody moved,
The world at its stand still,
As the girl who watches,
Her own mother lowered to the ground,
She no longer can remember her face,
All she remembers is what she found, A cold,
Lifeless,
Pale skinned,
Bruised and beaten,
Black and blue,
Red and white,
Were all the colors in the room, Nobody moved than either,
As the first tear falls,
Revenge,
And anger,
Take its toll,
She crumpled to the floor,
Not even a goodbye,
She can no longer make it right,
Can’t turn back the clock,
As much as she wishes,
Time has been forbidden,
Nobody catches her,
The world at its stand still,
She doesn’t want to remember.

On this bar stool I sit staring down the empty bottle in front of me.
The Jazz music is fading out, and the intoxicated people slurring for another drink is getting old.
If it was a different night, and I wasn't by myself it'd be a different atmosphere completely.
The drunks would be funny, and the music would move my feet.
But it's otherwise tonight, because I'm watching the drops of water fall down the edge of my drink.
I've only had one but it's enough for me to feel tipsy.
To the point you'd be here laughing at me.
Only because you swear I'm the only lightweight you know.
This bar holds so much more then I'd ever realized.
There's fragments of us all around this place.
The girl beside me trying to draw me into a night with her.
In my head it doesn't sound so bad, but I can't say anything.
I'd like to apologize but I'm so focused on the circle of water at the bottom of this bottle.
She'll leave eventually.
As she finally gets annoyed the door opens.
The bar attendant welcomes them, but it's all becoming a fuzzy mess.
There's a touch on my shoulder but it's not the same feeling as it should be.
As I turn to see you. I'd realized how much of a problem I have.
You smile at me but it doesn't meet your eyes.
Those blue translucent eyes that are of so lonely.
They're the color of water, and I'm afraid of drowning in them.
Only because I can't swim.
You sit beside me, and push away my drink and get me something different with a no alcohol.
But you get yourself something intoxicating and tell me that I need to let go of the addiction.
Oh god how those words hit.
Because I'd never realized that it wasn't the drink that intoxicated me.
But it was yourself that did; it was all the memories, all we'd been through together.
So finally I set down your drink, and I get up to walk away.
From this bar stool where all these memories haunted me.

The moment when the sun is just barely kissing the horizon,
And the stars are saying their final goodbyes.
As nightmares fade to dreams.
And I'm here with you on this rooftop.
With your forehead against mine, hands intertwined, and with closed eyes.
No words to say.
Our gentle caresses and our fractured hearts slowly start to mend.
We become intoxicated on each other's presence.
The last moment of the stars,
And the Suns Ray beaming down on us.
We open our eyes and time stands still.
I see you for the what feels like the first time.
My heart skips a beat and I know that you finally see me.

Where does the road end?
All these cars traveling
But to where I wonder.
The street lights gleam ever so brightly,
And I can feel the steering wheel in my hands.
Where am I going?
I used to know,
Now I don't.
This road isn't what's racing through my mind.
It's you.
Sitting beside me.
Where you should be.
What happened?
Where'd I go wrong?
I can no longer remember my way home.
I've been driving for so long now.
This road is endless,
And that's all I'm searching for.
The End.

There's a hole inside me.
I've learned to hide it to the point I can't even tell.
But on nights like these it bothers me.
How tiny I feel on this huge earth.
The pain of reminiscing memories that come back to haunt me.
Left inside thoughts that drown me.
They won't allow me to sleep.
If I were to sleep the nightmares will wake me.
Only if I could have you right here
Next to me.
Or to talk to me in someway.
I don't know how I can explain any of my missing pieces but all I know is.
If you were here the entire puzzle would fade away.
I could rest peacefully in my dreams.
As long as you held me in my sleep.
Then this hole inside me would cease to be.

There's a hole in the story.

When sky and earth would meet everyday, and the moon would stay among the stars.

Just watching the sun slowly fade from its reach.
And just as the moon would meet the sun there was something different.

There wasn't the same beauty as when the sun would meet the earth.
For the moon loved the sun, and the sun loved the earth.

Neither did both know that the stars loved the earth, and the earth loved the stars.

That the stars fell for the earth hoping that one day they'd finally collide, and create a whole new galaxy.

So my dear please tell me.
When will we ever finally meet?

In a moment her demons are screaming, and within seconds they'd surrounded her.
Pounding and killing.

In the same room he's watching.
Her break down to the floor but still standing on her own feet.
As he sees her hiding herself from the people around her. He surrounds her.

Within these moments of him crossing the room to her, she's incapable of seeing what's around her.
He pulls her into him.

Within those seconds her demons fall to peace and she holds onto him.
Falling in love with the way her demons play so well with his.

As he holds her gently he hears her mumbling, "Don't let me go this time."

His response had even put hell at peace, "I promise..."

Close the windows,
Shut the blinds,
Lock the doors,
Hide it all inside.
Shove it all away to a secret place;

Tune out the world so you don't hear this.
The screaming,
The crying,
The fake laughing,
The slamming of doors,
The hitting on walls.
The stomping of feet down the halls,
Every little thing that shouldn't happen in a home.

Every little detail that isn't what makes a family.
Lies behind these walls.
Trapped inside themselves in their minds.
Can we ever be free?
I only wish to forget all the memories my flesh and blood left me.

It’s as dark as the brightest hue, Nothing gold can stay so the dark, Creeps into view,
And I am haunted with thoughts,
The thoughts are of you,
Your smile,
the smirk,
everything,
It’s all you,
Scattered thoughts and shattered hearts,
Nothing can ever stay,
Because even the brightest hue,
Will fade away,
Like remembering Sunday,
I’ll fall to my knees,
As hell greets me,
I believe that this,
Is as dark as the brightest hue,
But I can’t find you.
You weren’t gold,
You aren’t perfect,
But you’re gone now,
And as I think of you,
You were as dark as the brightest hue,
Hidden in the shadows,
I found you.
Scars on your wrist and legs,
With your suicide date already ahead, I got on my knees,
I begged you to stay,
But you told me,
“I wanted to fly but I was too scared to try.”
I never knew you meant to die.
.
You aren’t the darkest hue,
Or the brightest,
You aren’t the sunrise,
Or the moon in the sky,
You are when the moon,
And the sun fell in love,
With you being the moon and I the sun,
We are as dark as the brightest hue. As you creep into view,
I love you.
More than our darkest hue,
So now I fly,
I’m no longer afraid to try,
And now I know,
Nobody will know I meant to die.

Under these street lights.
Along the sidewalks.
There was a shadow
Of you.

On the bench where we'd talk
And watch the world pass us by.
Rain, Snow, or blue gray skies we'd stay.
With each other till the sun would rise.

During the nights we'd smile.
The quiet streets open for us to move along.
There wasn't words for the way we'd be.

For you were the beautiful sky and I guess I'm chasing the horizon.
How can I keep these feelings bottled within me?

Tonight I walk to our bench.
The shadow of you is fooling me.
The street lights are fading, and I'm remembering.

That there's no longer a bench,
This is no longer just a street.
It's a graveyard;

Under city lights in the dead of night,
With the winter winds whispering against our cheeks,
As the stars come out to play,
With the buzz of cars in the fade,
Walking along these empty streets
I've come to term with the demons
That reside within me.
As you walk beside me I've started to notice the tempo in which you speak,
The melody of your words strung together so effortlessly,
How the pitch of your voice changes on various topics,
The feel of your hand holding ever so tightly onto mine.
And when our eyes meet yours hold a sight far more beautiful than the city's skyline on a starry night;
The moments I've wanted to last forever have never held the same euphoria.
As this is now and time can't stop to let me save this to heart without a constant battle of space,
The only place in which you reside within me.
So under these city lights and wondrous sky;
I'm trying to make this moment last for an infinity.

This street has been roamed down by I too many times.
Alone or not I've always found myself right back here.
On this street, on this bench.
Just watching you.

You mindlessly staring at the sky.
Drawing, writing, or just watching the lives of us walk by.
You're always there.
Just right across this street.
How curious I've become, how I've wondered if you've seen me.

Could I cross this street and begin something known as friendship?
Yes, but friendships come and go for me.
I want you to stay.

So I'll remain here across this street, on this bench and watch you. Just as normal; while you float away.
Into the space of your mind. Where I would love to know if I'm there,
In your thoughts.
As you are in mine.

I've collected pictures over the years.
Of all my friends I've made here.
I've put them in frames and but them somewhere safe.
Some are hidden away.
Though there's one frame that's empty.
It's for you, but you don't know.

I know we've never spoken but there's a connection across this street.
That brings me here daily to see if you're here too.
But as I wonder about you and stare blindly into space.
Lost in thought do I bother to notice. You see me too.

You have built me up,
Brick by brick.
Than I watched these walls grow
Far above the line of my sight.
Only to lock me
Inside the cage.
I watched you walk away.
Now I'm stuck and I'm evolving
But I yearn for the feel if the wind
Flowing through my feathers.
You stole a piece of me,
And I've grown tired of this cage.
Never has fear felt so friendly.
As I tore down your walls
Found the key to my cage.
I opened my wings and fell.
But that ground just brought back the life in me.
My soul has never flown on its own.
You loved me to ruins
Now I shall rise from the ashes.

Have you ever wanted to stop time?
Do you think about it every day?
You see there's this moment that I wish I could just freeze.
When everything is quiet and it's just you and me.
You're holding me close and everything just becomes serene.
You're smiling I can feel it, your hands I can feel against my back, your head right next to mine and while I bury my head in your shoulder.
Please tell me you don't mind if I just stay here a little longer.
Because this heart has never once fluttered so violently.
As if it were to leap out of my chest and make a home next to yours.
I want this feeling to stay, but time always continues.
It's something we always keep track of.
But I just have to ask.
Can we get rid of the hands on the clock?
That way we'll never be able to tell the end from the beginning.

I can vision it clearly without the need to see it properly with open eyes. We've been told to go and smell the roses but we aren't even touching the ground of the earth they've bloomed upon. We can barely see the roses and have never touched the pureness of such dainty. As I only see the pure white petals unscathed. The yearn to only grow closer is the fear of the rose to wither away blood stained as the sky will grow dark and all that will be left is to see the imperfections of a rose and its hidden thorns.

Books on top of books and no one can see.

The lonely girl in the corner losing herself inside her mind.
Or the guy that's watching her while he puts books back on the shelves.

Never speaking a word to each other until one day he ran into her on her way in.

He asked her curiously why she'd always been alone never speaking.
In minuscule voice she said,

"I'm hiding."

Then returned to her spot in the library.
When he returned the next day she wasn't there.
But he found a note in her place.

"Come find me."

Under this dreadfully dark sky.
You called out to me,
and in all your glory. You told me.
"Lets create holes in the sky; where the stars should be."

I used to wonder where the world began.
when maybe I was asking myself the wrong question.
When did my world begin to turn?
There's this tiny infinity inside you, and you've created something inside me.

So under this dreadfully dark sky I had come to realize.
That between you and I;
your abstruse thoughts had calmed the words swimming through mine.
Every last word.

Holding a pencil in the belief it is a pen.
I cannot go back and right my wrongs; for I'm writing as though it were ink.
These words that bleed through me they're intricate to put to paper.
Just let it go you'll tell me, but it's not so simple.
There's a piece of me here and there.
Then there's a story I can't leave unfinished.
Words that flow through me become jumbled, and I'll lose my sanity trying to figure it out.
So here I am putting my thoughts to paper.
Writing in a pencil I believe to be a pen.
Where hopefully these words aren't as intricate as they'd seemed to be.

So this is for the people out there;
No matter who you are, what you believe in, what race you are; we've all heard this and if you haven't then here's what I'm about to say. I mean every word of this.

You are capable of anything. If you don't like something, change it. If you still don't like it change it again, and again. As many times as you like. No matter what you're human and we make mistakes. I promise you this that no matter what you think of yourself, you are more then that. You are the most amazing person. You are beautiful or handsome and anyone would be lucky to know you.
You have something to offer for this world and it will change it. So go for it. Be who you are because nobody else is ever going to be able to compare to you. So please I'm asking anyone who is looking for a reason to be alive right now. This is it. You're not alone and maybe nobody will understand the stuff you're going through perfectly but we try. So I'll try not to be the cliché here but if you ever need someone to reach out to message me or talk to someone you can trust, because as scary as it sounds it will help.

You were a chaotic disaster, meant to destroy everything in sight.
Warnings I was told just out of spite,
Curious to wander into unexplored places.
You were like wonderland, and I
Didn't have a map.
But I dived into the adventure, only to find.
That you were a horribly beautiful truth, all while I was living a lie.

Those days when we'd laugh and argue about the tiniest things. When you'd look at me with endearing eyes, and how I'd fit ever so perfectly in your arms.
Hours would become minutes. Where'd the time go?
The nights we spent under city lights just talking with our eyes.
When we'd walk so far we'd get lost in a whole new place with a different skyline.
We made the city ours within a matter of months.
The bitter air chilling my bones and you throwing your arm around me and holding me close.
To keep me warm.
I should've known you couldn't stay.
The truth spilled after the last anniversary.
The look in your eyes said things I'd wished I'd never had known. Now I'm understanding how you'd have me avoid one side of the city.
Tonight I'm staring out at the horizon of a different night.
On a different side of town.
Holding myself to keep warm.
I'm trying to keep the tears from my eyes because they cannot speak.
While yours are probably holding her gaze and telling her all the lies you'd ever told me.

What happened to you?
This little girl that held her hand high with the answer dancing off her fingertips.
Who gave a hug to strangers because she believed that it was the cure to sadness.
How did you end up so empty?
You had someone walk away from you,
Raised your voice but felt like no one was listening,
Were promised the world only to get nothing,
You were made of gold;
But who turned you to stone?

I'm alone at night with only my thoughts. A terrifying and comforting thing. Yet at this time I'm left to wonder if you're asleep as well.

As the stars come out to dance in the night sky while the moon holds a beautiful symphony. Can you hear it?
My whispers between the wind? Asking to dance with you before this night ends. Or how I'd rearrange the stars to get to where you are.

So as the night continues to grow I'm hoping you know. That even though the night is eerie time. It's the thought of you no matter how far.
That never stops to put a smile on my face.

Sitting on the edge of this cliff.
It's a risk,
But I've always been the gambling type.

My poker face is something no one can mistake.
So when time should end I cannot say.
I've lost the hands of the clock that hold my fate.

I'm letting go.
Nobody is telling me I should stay.

Time is lost,
But never found.