I want to close my eyes black and white.
Shiny drops and blurry.
Beer at night, white lace on my dress.

Outside on the grass.
Looking down.
Where are you, where’s the music?

My hair is down and so am I.
My eyes are a mess and so am I.

I close my eyes and run.
I close my eyes and dance.
I close my eyes and dream.

Wish I could sleep.
With you next to me.
For the rest of my life.

My mind wondering off far.
My body at ease.
Carried by love.

All of what I am here buried in this world still now.
I want my body buried…
I’ll be running towards foggy fields.

This energy.
Created by this world.
And me, my life, my body, my mind.

It’s going to stay and it’s going.
Like shiny drops and blurry sight, beer at night.
And lace.

Lying outside on the grass.
With you.
And the music.

Endless fields of daisies.
Bare feet and black dress.
It’s still dewy.
I’m still sleepy, tired.
I don’t want to try again to get up and leave.
Be someone else.
I may roll over and dream away if I can.

But there’s a line of laundry.
I’m waiting for the sun to dry it.
So I can shake my clothes.
Before tomorrow I will be done.

The same things now repeatedly daily.
These are the days I didn’t think I’d get to see.
I wanted to die young.
These are the “old daisy days”.
Everything keeps on repeating.

I’m so over trying to get up and leave.
Trying to put on a face.
I can dream in my field feeling so exhausted.
My troubled mind can lay down in daisies.

Waiting for a line of laundry.
Not too long, you don’t want to be having to shake too many eventually.
When the next round hangs to dry.
It wears you down.
Cause it has to be right.
Or it feels too bad.

But now I’m stuck.
And I’m so over everything in here.
I’m so done trying to change or do anything to help myself getting up.
Maybe I should just lift up a foot.
Pick a little daisy.

And take the smallest little steps.
Think in possibilities still.
Nothing to lose.
Lying in a field of old daisies.
With a tired mind.

I’ve come to put a limit to your pain.
To early cold morning tears.
Chug me down like a special beer.
Today is where the flowers bloom and the wind is light.
You’re running free, the dewy sky brings you to life.

Everything is dark.
But you’re fighting for your freedom.
And I’ve come to the rescue.
I’m your music and your special place inside.
I’m your first sip of a perfect tea.
And I’m the arms you wake up in.

I’m safety and freedom.
I block out the noise.
I set you free like a dove.
I’m everything you dream of.
Everything that’s inside.
Of you.

I’m yours and I won’t leave, I will love you till the end and beyond.
I’m the reflection from your eyes.
I’m the colors that are with you and the darkness full of magic.
I’m the Christmas lights.
I’m the sparkling sea.
I’m the deep dive.
The crying rain.
The thunder and lightning.
The fireworks.

By one touch you will feel me all over.
And I’m overwhelming you in the best way.
But you can’t always reach me.
I’m rare to find.
But when I’m there everything is right and your dreams are bright.

In this world you can’t be with me most of the time.
I’m just the longing that keeps you dreaming loving the feeling.
I’m that one special person.
That place underground.
Inside your super conscious.

My mind is a cracked glass.
Strong with cracks.
Don’t use pressure or it breaks.
There will always be cracks.
And you can’t pour from an empty cup with cracks.

Shattered glass.
I’m a snow globe inside.
I’m trapped in a house that’s dark.
With many rooms and stairs and hiding spots.
I go there often in my dreams.
There are visitors a lot.

Sometimes I walk outside.
I’m on the road leaving the house.
I go to many places.
I meet so many people.
Familiar and new.

My heart is so bold and dark in my dreams.
It can handle any situation.
So many adventures I go through.
Sometimes it’s with the people I know when I’m awake.
Sometimes strangers….

But I can wake up screaming softly because I’m back in my cracked mind.
Cracked world.
In a dark house in a snow globe.
With much less room.
Less room than the one from my dreams.

⭐️🌙💫✨

I wish I couldn’t see the things that aren’t ok.
I wish I didn’t feel the pain.
I wish I didn’t hear the noise.
And that I was just able to move without the tension.
I’m so stuck.
I’m so sad.

I wish I could leave this dark place and the pressure.
I wish I was free from everything.
I wish it stopped, all of the pushing and pulling.
At last.

I’m so dark but my hair is light.
Dying it won’t fix anything.
So I try not to be tempted.
Leave me be, I’m so sad and so tired of it.

As I’m sitting here stuck again.
Every try is thrown back down by another noise.
A feeling stays.
Discomfort.
Too much.
Why do I try?
It’s takes so long to get anywhere.
It takes so much.
And then later hopefully there’s peace.
An evening with music and beer.
But before there’s a war.
And I never really win, I just get through it.

There’s nothing better than being consciously out of it.
Carrying that white flag all aware of it.
Breaking the barriers.
Wasting away in my comfort that’s slipping away every second.
And hopefully coming back.