Persica

Persica Mar 2016

You remember when every time I tell you 'I love you' and you replied with 'I love you more' and I just shook my head and just kind of laughed and smiled at you like I have a secret you'll never know? It's because I thought you were wrong.

And I am right.

Persica Mar 2016

How I let my poetry go

I eat poetry for breakfast, lunch and dinner
I especially love them as midnight snacks
Been chewing and swallowing them for years
I've learned how to digest them into my system
Let them flow through my veins and use them as energy for when my body needs it most
But I'm still learning how to ***** words into blank pages
I'm still learning the art of throwing up emotions for anyone to see
Cause I'm afraid that ink have the capacity to blacken an entire paper
Leave sticky smudges on my fingers
Difficult to remove
And when I do succeed in cleaning my entire hands of it
I'm scared I'll realize that I like it better with stains
I'm still learning how to let go of things and of memories.

I'm still learning how to let people go.

Persica Dec 2015

THE THINGS I DID AND THE THINGS I WANT TO TELL YOU ON THOSE DAYS YOU WERE NOT THERE

My hair is an inch shorter today. I cut it.

I listen to your favorite song by Phil Collins.

I read our conversations from the first day.

I want to ask you who is your favorite superhero as a kid.

If you are granted three wishes, what would they be?

I love the way you talk to me. I love how your voice sounds different when you speak to me than when you talk to other people. It sounds softer. Less gruff. Less tough.

What if something happened to you? Something really bad.

What is your biggest regret in life?

I spent the whole afternoon watching the news.

I googled your name. Have you ever googled mine?

I posted something about you on my facebook, cause i know you don't have one. And you might never get to read it.

I imagined how i would react if you suddenly appear on my doorstep.

I imagined my reaction when we meet.

I wonder if i cross your mind. Or maybe you are too busy with things for me to enter your thoughts. I know i'm a distraction.

I wonder what you think about before you fall asleep.

Persica Dec 2015

I fell in love

I fell in love with a dream
a promise
a thought
with the written words
the typed phrases but never uttered
the soundless voice
the shadow behind the face
the fake names
the vague pictures
the excuses unexplained
the verse taken from another page
the music heard but never played.

i wrote this while riding the bus home. i don't think it's finished yet.

Sep 2015

A Thomas Hawkins

Everywhere else.

And as I realise things have changed
I see you in places new, places I've never seen you before
In corners usually reserved for cobwebs and being ignored
In the song of the wind trough the leaves as it builds
In the rain and distant thunder that meanders across the blackened sky
In the shadows cast by candles burned too late into the night
All these places you are
All the places you shouldn't be and none of the ones you should
In the air that I breathe, your scent on my pillow, on my skin
In my arms, where once you felt so safe, so certain
Next to me

And I miss you.

And I find myself contemplating the unthinkable,
wondering if painful memories of someone are better than no memories of them at all

And the truth becomes unbearable...

Persica Jul 2011

Life worth living

What makes life worth living
aside from loving and forgiving
was it the people close to you
or the ones you wished you knew?

What makes things worth owning
except the price you paid from buying
if what you owned defines you
will you be worth your value?

What makes one worth loving
if it gives your heart some aching
will you risk it through
to find a love that's true?

— The End —