what is this feeling
you're all alright
and i am floating away
from the cold of the floor

and the heat of the air
is a blanket of life
not the punishment of fatigue
not the reminder of toil

we didn't bring anything else
besides 10 dollars
a boat ride ticket
nachos

but you'll all be arrested
by the buzzkills
if you reveal your face to them

what is this happiness
it is real, if it is
and there is no effort in hiding it
there is no pain behind it
there is no shame in having it

i am glad for you
i just know, this will last enough to be worth it
hey, my man, i love you
hey, my love, i missed you
hey there, stranger
let's be happy together

all of the world
is out of tune
and our music is still beautiful

and our beauty comes not because we are perfect
harmony is all of us
trying
and failing
and becoming beautiful

knowing we are not by ourselves
a single song
but others pitching in
and making accidents
in symphony

wonderful, it was, to be young
to hold the sun on the palm of your hand
and the blue of the sky
out of your eyes

they say we live to rot and age regardless
seems, though, that the world ages without us
instead of us growing entropied

still
sleep on the bus like a tired old ant
wake to find your headset bud under your seat
become a child again, as the sun shines from headlights
and the blue of the coming night and the fleeting forever of a day well spent flies into your ears and skin

and you'd think instead
wonderful, it is, to age
to know how much you now can remember
and re-remember
remember your universe's wonderful bus rides
and park walks
and well spent pennies for ***** ice cream
to see your universe smile back

wonderful, it really is
knowing you held the world
and you were too

have i ever been so afraid to lose you
or me

no, all those sweet nothings
are not nothing
they made me fall for you
because you fulfilled them

and i have never been so afraid of losing
because it would really be nothing in the end
if so

it is raining within the city expanse

and my friend is in the back seat of the pedicab
and i am huddled besides the driver seat, my knee recieving raindrops
and it is flying between an alley
and a highway

and when we stopped on the red light
it rested on a street sign

its wings were yellowed
not the yellow bestowed by loving creation
the yellow of light and flowers that serve

but the yellow i know
of homeless men's hopeless teeth
and street side gravy noodles

of rusted flying pigeon bikes
and industrial waste flowing from millionaire castles

of sunsets in this city
this veiled in a day's smog
or its century's smog

you are not hopeless gravy, however
you are a butterfly

how my legs dared to jump off the vehicle
how my arms wanted to reach up
how my hands wanted to clasp you gently within a chamber
of my spindly fingers

how i could only stare and wonder
within this pedicab
within the center lane

could i clean you off this city's mess
could i perhaps, knowing you were not born stained
but born pure
but born loved, lovingly, by creation
how i accuse the world and it's homeless millionaires
of tampering with purity

i knew i wanted, and it made it seem i could
to stop the world
and clasp you gently
to get you to the nearest wellness

and i hope i did
for it was only what i could
hope that the rain would be gentle on you
dear butterfly

this rain calms me
i hope it would be enough for you
it is not for me
i am stained, but my wings are not
as pure as yours

if my friend the rain is not enough
know, i will jump off this pedicab still
to help you
fly

away from this city

i feel like i am torn
if mayonnaise is a good condiment or not

i take a bite of a piece of lettuce with a smear of mayo and i'm like

this is ******* disgusting

and i have it on my rice and salmon and i think

this is the most important part of the meal

and i realize

that mayonnaise is the worst ******* thing in the world

for making me think it is good and bad at the same time

- j. caesar

i live in a coconut
in some beach among the garbage patch
there are fish bodies here and there
but no fishermen to collect them

i lived in a skyscraper before
and i fed on the clouds
it made me fat with summer rain
and eventually came
tropical depressions

and i had lightning friends
and hail brothers
and cold friends
and hard friends

and i missed the train i built myself
and years i took and told myself
that train would have burst into flames
and **** both the crowd in the left
and the man in the right

oh i told you
there's bad out there
in the sea
or the sky
or the train yards
but dont stop
oh god, dont stop
there's so many questions i have to ask
now in the present
all to explain my past
a past i can never go back to
but never leave

how could it be

i need to know
how



i was trampled down by everyone and this life

and a few offered their hand to pick me up, but they slipped away by the haste they had

and i knew it was my fault for being so slow

but i couldnt help to think

why they were going that fast