Today the little birdie screamed out and told me
I was worth saving
*We're all worth saving

Onlookers!
Drift here.
Behold your eyes
For what you are about to see
If nothing short of fantasy.

You see a dazzling girl
Twirling around with her heart in a whirl
Lost in the stars
Little known, her heart lies behind bars
Now I know what you think-
And don't make a stink
But this illusion you see
Is a blurred reality

Ladies and Gents
Lend me your ears
Gather round close
For this next set of mirrors
With tricks more often than treats

Look at him smile
He drove all those miles,
Yet with nothing to say
His mind moving fast
Will his beating heart last?

He loves her so
But can't let her know
Oh no no
That wouldn't do
She hasn't a clue
Of just how lost he is
In the brokenness of her

Her hands melted right into mine
The perfect fit, one of a kind
I was gifted the words in which to speak
The flavored sentences to make her weak
Too perfect to exist, God had made her
Lust had consumed me, Satan her sender
But lust had to be my least worry
When my heart departed in a hurry
It leaped right into her sweet soft eyes
Without any warrant or comprimise
When the hell will I come to realize
My heart wishes for my own demise
But yet another chance I give, to my own
Surprise

He touched me and the sky lit up
Blue had a meaning once again
Clouds could gather
To accumulate and rain down
Once again
That essential hue

They hit the ground, bringing life
Green dominated the land
Complimenting the sky
Brining further colors in the voice of petals
In this presence of new life

I began to thrive

Swiftly,
Like the autumn breeze
You had no problem blowing me off

Hearing this song makes me think of you, ya know
I can still see your smiling face
Holding on so tightly to that beautiful guitar
I wished for nothing more than to be held
As gracefully as you caressed it
If I had stings, I knew you would be the one to play me
Unleashing all my beautiful sounds
You were going to make my soul sing colors

But now its finished
The solo has ended, so like all artists of your talent
You smashed the lovely curves into the harsh ground beneath you
I still play these cords in my shattered heart
I harden my lungs as I belt the words
And push the air stained with your passion out of my lungs
This song that kills me still, which plays in your healing voice
Will be the poison teaching me to survive

The way you hugged the bottle
Tighter than you ever held me
Allowed me to see fatherly love
For a toxin much stronger than myself
Something inanimate
That would take the pain away
Like my smile never did
I guess my love for you
Could never heal like the whiskey

I'd delete your number
If only my fingers knew how
Just to forget your name
Only if my heart would let you go

The light of you haunts me
I just pray to be free

Tides that are bigger than you will always turn
That doesn't mean you have to go with the current

Puff puff puff
'Till my lungs turn black
I want to love him
But he'll never love me back

I fall apart
Drift away like ash in the breeze
With or without you
So why bother?

I can feel it building up inside me
Like a raging storm the waves abuse my heart
I can feel the floods behind my eyes
Wanting to add to the chaos
But in all this madness
The only thing I know how to do is smile
Trying to make the light shine through the cracks

I'm starving for someone
To fill the bed with because
I'm cold and empty

Mix drinks
Not emotions

Dont speak
It'll keep you from chocking on the wrong words

You'd drown me in an instant
Just to take the air from my lungs
Because it was the only thing left
Willing to say your name

What happens when the stars cross
and your face isn't the one I see?

When the planets align
but you're not the one in their path?

What happens when, as you fall for me,
I fall away from you?

There are better things to cry about
But somehow it's always you

You played so much with smoke and mirrors
I didn't even notice the smoke coming from the fire you set under me

I smiled while you laughed at me
Even when I knew you weren't making jokes

I wrote your name today
And I couldn't picture your face

The sun could never outshine her
However, I failed to remember something simple
We continue to see the light of a star
Even years after they have died

Be my muse
Even when you're no longer my passion

I stare at these blank pages
Wanting to spill my soul
Knowing **** well
That's there's nothing left to empty

I've been hiding forever
But no one has ever come to seek me out
That's not how the game is supposed to be played

I'm drained and damaged
And oddly never broken

The way his smile carries me is delightful
His personality is intoxicating and heavy
My heart bleeds for him
We are close, but in no other way than the soul
Which in its purest form,
Is nothing more than every essential piece of a being

If he were a color, his body parts would be all different
Such a profound concept
Wrapped up into flesh and bone
Its almost hard to believe- in a human mindset
The universe delivered him to me
To guide me to where I need to be

Thank you,
          You know who you are,
and I love you, in a certain way, for all you are.

Kiss me
Under the wounded twilight

Take me
Under the bleeding starlight

Hate me
For the depleting moonlight

Leave me
Due to the judging sunlight

You dance in and out of my life-
and around everything I want to hear

You keep me close-
sometimes spinning me away

With each graceful move-
You manage to scuff up the floor

Dragging dirt around-
Until our dance isn't even beautiful

Remember all those years ago?
They warned us that all that time together wasn't good-
Was not healthy- but its not like we were on a diet
We drank in the warmth of each others company
And feasted on delightful conversation

Now, when you leave I know why we were warned
I put the weakest peaces of myself in you, hoping that
Maybe when you leave, I would only be stronger
All I did was tear myself apart

When you go my mind beings to decompose
You were all that kept it alive
My monsters creep out form the closet
Like every day is Halloween, but they're not after candy-
They're after me

My heart breaks down
I can feel the pieces fall into my gut
Those soft eyes kept it pumping
The lack of you is dangerous
All of me falls apat

Constantly and only when you're gone

I know why they said it wasn't healthy for us
Because you replaced all my other addictions
I cry and beat my head against the wall because I know
Nothing I could smoke would **** the lingering pain like you
Without you, I'm just a shell waiting to be filled again
....with anything

Which is why I do what I do-
When the distance is unbearable
Someone else offers to fill me with light
Sometimes I think it might be love
It never is, and I don't think it ever could have been
Love is the chemical my brain produces when my heart starts beating
Only ever reanimated and put back together by your gaze

Letting you walk away is a dangerous game
Time is the unbearable theashold
How long is too long before I become
More than just empty...too empty
Or too broken

It all sounds bad, I know, but that is not the case
I learned something while being entertained by others
You are all I ever need
I was emptied faster with them- they were not you
This distance is killing me, however, that is not a problem
Because you alone can bring me back to life



...never forget though, it still rains every moment you're gone

Science says that we are mostly water
If that were true then I should be able to melt away
To slip though all of the little cracks
And drift in a direction from it all

But here I still sit
Wishing that if I was not water
That I could be invisible
Even science has no evidence of that ever happening

I'm constantly backed into the corner of society
Friendless and not all there
Riddled with the things that make psychologists giggle
Just someone else's side project

I would say I got the last laugh
That I was able to rip you apart
But it seems the loneliness
Beat me to it

Looks like after all this trouble
All these broken promises
Shattered and abused hearts
You were still my biggest mistake
Not for just what you did
But for believing I would be able to love you

I am a hypocrite down to my core
So forgive me for trying to save you
When I never could save myself

Learn to fall in love with who you are
Instead of who you think you're meant to be

My soul will wait in the shadows until the day it can see your light next
A chariot of grace and comfort will bring me back to you
My heart will ache each day you are gone
Until it may once more collide with yours and light the world on fire
If there was one thing I could say to you it would be as follows

You
Are more than I will ever be
You are the forest which gives my lungs the air to breathe
All of the earth congregates to you for your wisdom and strength to keep growing
Life comes to you for guidance and solace

Me To You
I want to keep you grounded
Never to hold you back, but to always show you where your heart would be welcome
I want to be the source of your life and nourishment
To keep you alive and well so your trees may prosper

You are the most I have ever met
I have never been so caught in a soul
So may doors to enter
Though which the one I opened
Has taught me to see
What I could be
And how your life is closer to mine than anything before
You are perfection
Only because you are all that I wish to be
After opening this door
I could see that you are I
And I am me

"Don't you think you're wasting your potential"
...potential*?
I want not
Thus I waste not
Simply trading one skill
For one of equal value
In the ever lasting search for greater happiness

Love is a chemical reaction
Its the rush of things mixing in the brain
The sweaty palms and achy legs
Nights filled with lengthy texts
Leading up to the risky three words:
"I love you"

Lust in a physical desire
Its the rush of rolling in another's sheets
The sweaty bodies and shaky limbs
Nights filled with screams of desire
Leading up to the routine phrase:
"Let's ****"

So many past names
And almost given last names
Too much to ever keep track of
Who the hell are you?
Who am I supposed to become?

Too many passing glances
And familiar faces
To ever keep straight
I'm sorry, do I know you?
Do I even know myself?

Baby,
I'm just a man
Lead by a candle
Trying to find my way to Heaven's gates
But look at you
The angel I've always wanted to find
Taking me straight to hell
How ironic
To find such beautiful wings are tainted
And cannot fly
Seems they were only made for falling

I missed out on too much
While missing you
I miss it all
Shame you're missing yourself
And now you've missed me for good

It wasn't too long ago that I thought I'd never forget your face
Now the color of your eyes have faded
And the soft tingle of your lips on mine has pasted
I can't recall the way you smell
Only faintly can I ponder your smile
As the days pass by
I wonder how much you'll forget of me

And most things in-between
A sugar coated horror show
People who visit never know
Even as the light doth shine
Every heart beats before its out of time

If you fear monsters or the dark
Best be brave and find a spark
To light your path back to reality
I warned you so don't be mad at me
The people who come never leave
And for your loss the rest will grieve

Know that at 11:40 pm
I could have destroyed you
I could have killed you one last time
I didn't because some part of me loved you
But at 11:43 pm you killed that last part
You destroyed a tiny piece of me
Shows how much you love me

I felt it
In that last one
Those sparks on my lips
Those came from two hearts merging
A power so out if this world
The last time it was felt
Or even experienced
Was the Big Bang

The rush of having those stunning emeralds
Piercing down to the core
Everything inside beats faster
But the world around spins no different
Does it not know what is about to happen?

The fading green gems growing closer
It's going to happen
But where is the title wave?
The rush is gone and turns to heat
Scorching deserts of embarrassment flourish
Cactus needles fill the gaps in time

Looks like it's not this time
But maybe some time soon

...or at least I hope

I'm sorry that it ends this way
I just had to leave
Before we boil in sin
My heart cannot be conflicted
By one raw material and
From things not of this world
Running as my feet blister
Only to keep them from melting

Listen
Very close
It's rare the truth comes out
During the light of day
Or whispered in the shadows of night
So I beg you, listen
Look not at the clock,
But to your heart
Right now
Yes, this instant.

In this moment
You
Are
Perfect
You in this moment
Right now
Are exactly how you are supposed to be
All is happening how it should

Take comfort in knowing the world will turn
Now and forever
Always as it has
Even when you're not looking

So breathe easy
Rest soundly
You
Are perfect
Right now in this moment
Exactly how you're meant to be

Roses are red
Thier petals are hot
I made it clear that I love you
But you did not