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Sleepz Apr 2014
Three years ago..Sleeps

I see simple things,
Things we wish weren't so simple.
Maybe people just wish they weren't so crippled,
In our minds we feel 1000 years old.
In our hearts we can only grow so much.
With every heartbeat we seem to dry up on the inside.  
Whenever our heart skips we seem to feel there's something missing.
We hide, and we hide.
You aren't hidden,
I can see right through you.
I used to see your weaknesses,
But now I'm just as blind as you are.
Maybe I'm the only one whose hiding,
Maybe I'm the one whose scared,
Maybe I'm just a ******* *****,
Maybe I replace that **** with hate.
Maybe I am some cocky ******* who is over confident and self centered.
Maybe I am, or will always be somebody you look down on no matter what.
The only problem is,
How would it feel to have your knees broken by this person,
And you can't help But to look up and say, "I'm sorry, I was wrong."
the thing is, I don't need your apology.
These people are a joke,
And it's okay because they'll end up choking on their tongue.
My wife told me,
"It's alright to be mean sometimes,"
it's either I took that too seriously or she didn't know what she was saying,
The next week she said I'm not the same person she fell in love with three years ago.
So I say I didn't think there was such thing as love at that time.
And it all happened three years from now,
And three years later
I guess I'm back in the same place I was,
Three years ago.
Still no such thing.
Sleepz Mar 2014
"I'll Be that guy for you, I'll be whoever you want me to be.  The one to love you, the one to break you, the one you cry for, the one you will always think about, but as long as I am all these things -  No matter how much I have broken your heart, I will be what you want me to be, I will be your prisoner, the one you can't let go, the one you'll hate, the one you'll wish you've never met, the one you will talk to your friends about.  And if you ever thought you were the one to break mine, don't forget that I never had one to begin with.  Which is why I'll forget the fact that you ever even existed."
True Pride
Dedicated to a person I know.
Sleepz Mar 2014
The perfect person

the perfect person will be perfect,
and with his perfection he will have the perfect attitude.
the only problem is one day he will feel betrayed,
and the person who betrayed him he will not forgive.
the problem is that he has a dysfunction,
and that is that he cannot trust anybody.
he waits and he waits,
for the people that will begin to ***** him over.
he waits and he waits,
love for others isn't love unless they make the same effort he makes.
love for others isn't love,
unless people are consciously making decisions based on what he would think,
the same way he does for those he loves.
and though he doesn't always honor his parents,
he knows that whatever he does they will not stop loving him.
so Maybe his idea of love is wrong,
Maybe the only people he can love is his family.
Maybe no one is perfect,
but **** that.
I am this person,
and the only perfect there is to me is myself.
because everyone else will let you down,
and everyone else will look for a reason to Hold things against you.
the perfect person knows they are great,
and instead of investigating the truth he learns that people lie.
therefore I trust myself more than anyone else,
so Why should I be a perfect person to you,
if I don't expect you to ever be perfect?
and Why should I care about you,
if my love will never be perfect?
so Why should I use the word perfect,
if nothing in this world is ever going to be or ever was?
because of this, forget perfection.
because I don't care about it,
and neither should you.
everything you hang on to must be let go someday.
the only scary part is,
Why is it so easy sometimes?
Sleepz Mar 2014
There's people I miss,
People I wish I was with.
The ones I feel who have given up on me,
The ones I feel I have given up on.
There's people that I used to talk to,
There's people that I used to love,
But these people don't want to talk,
And when I think about it,
I dont want to talk to you either.
I blame you,
Not because I hate you but because my pride is better than missing you.
I blame you,
Not Cause you're a bad person but just Cause, *******.
And **** the memory of you.
I blame you,
Because sometimes my thoughts get out of hand,
I blame you, this is Why I blame you.
Do you wonder Why we don't talk no more?
No you don't.
But I do, and ******* for that.
And because of you
There's people that I miss,
And people I wish were dead.
Wait, Hold on I take that back.
These people have already been dead to me for quite some time.
Sometimes I miss people I used to talk to, good friends, girlfriends, girls I was never with and wish I talked to today.  Girls I have rejected and feel sorry about.  People that had stopped talking to me for stupid reasons.
Sleepz Jan 2014
We see hate every day,
And we relearn it every day.
Our parents tell us to love everyone,
No matter how much those people hurt us,
Even our enemies.
We try it,
Then others teach us what it feels like to be hurt;
And we learn that its okay to suffer because of others.
We dont like this feeling,
But learn to not treat others the way they treat us.
Even if our dads beat us,
At the end of the day we learn that we must teach them  how to love us.

Then comes the day,
When no one is there to remind you how to love.
You aren't reminded that its okay to suffer for others.
Then comes the day you finally hurt someone,
When you hurt that person you look into their eyes.
You are able to see your face when all those people hurt you as if you were looking at a mirror.
Youre looking at yourself through that person,
you remember learning that its okay to suffer for these people,
Because these people are hurt more then you are.
You realize that we never stop learning how to hate.

So when I grow up,
I will learn to hit my son.
And do you know what I'll tell him?
"Come here my son,
Let me teach you what its like to hate,
The way my parents taught me."
And with the look on his face,
your son,
Will be the one to teach you what love was.
Sleepz Jan 2014
A bit devious,
A bit of a killer,
A bit blood thirsty.
But that's all in the inside.
A bit rebellious,
A bit careless,
A bit aggressive.
But that's all in the inside.
A bit insensitive,
A bit angry,
A bit lonely.
If you want to know whats inside,
This is what you'll find.
A bit crazy,
A bit of a ******,
A bit possessive,
Maybe even a bit possessed.
But I don't give a ****,
Because that's all in the inside.
If you see through me this is what you'll find.
A bit of trust issues,
Runs in my head because of ******* from the past.
A bit of myself wishes I could come out.
The only funny part is most of you are just like me,
But most of you can't control it or wouldn't be able to.
The only funny part is you judge me in your own minds,
Because I show what you are afraid of inside yourself.
But I can control it.
The only funny part is,
You can't.
I'm a bit ****** up in the head,
I'm a bit upset with how things are, but do anyone of you see that?
No,
I can control it.
Most of you I can see right through,
Most of you I can see falling apart.
And I'll judge you the way you judged me.
By offering you a helping hand,
And holding back as soon as you're ready to reach for it.
I'm a bit mad, just like you.
Sleepz Dec 2013
To tell you the truth,
I dont think I love your smile as much as I used to,
It seems nothing but fake to me now.
And to tell you the truth,
I dont think I love your eyes as much as I used to,
Because I feel even they lie most of the time.
And to be totally honest with you,
I dont think youre as pretty as you used to,
After I saw what was inside.
I just dont find you the same,
I just can't see you the same way.

Ive tried and ive tried,
Believe me I have.
And believe me you still cross my mind;
Just not as much as you used to,
Its just not as much as you used to.
I dont get upset anymore,
I dont worry about love anymore,
I could be happy alone forever for all i care.
I could replace you with someone for all I care.
And to tell you the truth,
I have given up on you.

And to be totally honest,
I realize there are days I even forget you exist.
We were always honest with each other,
Except this time I'm not afraid to be.
To tell you the truth,
You did teach me one thing:
You don't need permission to read someone,
Sometimes they display themselves like a mirror that has another side to it,
You just need to peek in.
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