Life is a joke
Sitting passively actively, inhaling the smoke
Eyes like radiation burns, lingering and permanent
Going insane, like a disgusting sermon
Preaching with black tainted beer where there should be bourbon
Image and sounds like a perverted Carmina Burana
Disguised as a driver, charging me a fare to where
I just wanna die, among the elephants, the poor, and the tragically faire

Looking for symbolism, where there is simply none
Watching the years end, in the same place they begun
IM GIVING UP MY VICES, says the drunkard
IM QUITTING WHAT KILLS ME, says the foolishly unencumbered
Parallel walls of grounded stars lead to the same ******* place
As any other god ****** road, between main and sixth, fallen from grace

Streets, lined with tattoo parlors and broken down antique stores
And the run down old churches, which only tell you ****** forever more
Theres only time for open caskets, one by one
As we gaze into the glazed eyes of an american dream undone
By complacency, as we watch it waste away in a hospital bed conundrum

Cigarette smoke rain clouds; harbringers of times ill to come
Puke your guts out people, get your fix, doesnt matter where it comes from
And as the acid rain dreams burn away reality
Well finally realize our lack of genuine alacrity
How long was I not there, we'll all wonder
As that wall of atomic fire rushes closer

Only until it's too late do we learn from history
And when our house of love and avarice is burning to ashes
Will we see the thousands of errors
That made us **** one another

I hope I never die
So I can see when this fabled future makes its ******* entrance
Each day is the present, the same boring, grimy, hopeless present
I'd love to see when that happens.
I hope the zealots never die
So when the world disintigrates around them
They will never get to meet the god they love so much
I hope the suits never die
I wanna be there when there's nothing left to own
And theres no bank or server big enough
To hold all that blood money
I hope I never die
So when that oncoming tectonic crash creates the cataclysm
That I've always wanted to see
I hope I never die
So I can be witness to when we as a people get pushed just a little bit to far
And we finally stop cooperating

On the other hand
I hope die as loudly as possible
So when the future shows up, I can punch it in the ******* face
I wanna ride the bomb righ into the vatican
And I hope I can see the panic in a suits eyes
As we chase each other toward the concrete
I hope when the big one comes, that I'm the first to go
So I can laugh and laugh and laugh

Knowingly, he waits for innocence to end
His eyes, glossed with instinctual terror
Factually fearful of something he knows nothing about
And the arbiter watches, like some perverse anubis
Observing the process with no clear objective
Like a statue taking a liking to cigars
The arbiter wants only to see the end, having no conception of what it means

Innocence and snow, both gentle
Falling, for the rare and irreplaceable moment of suspension in open air
Innocence and The End, present for one another
Be it though, a meaningless meeting
Neither of them knowing how important they are to each other


If only I could sweet one, but I may only be witness
Im sorry if youre scared
But know that I am here for you, when soon, all will leave you

Innocence can only look back
With no life left to look back on
This visitation is all he has

The ground grows close now
Innocence does not know the end is real
The Arbiter stays close, remaining only of occupation
There are no Angels here for you now he says

It wont hurt, it wont be scary anymore, I promise
Go with no knowledge of your armagedon
Will not go unnoticed.

Innocence becomes more innocent once it is ruined
Once the fragile and immaculate has broken into a million pieces, is it truly recognized
As a limbo that was as beautiful as it was terrifying
Something so perfect it seemed as though all things were destined to break before it
A moment when the ground of the earth becomes the villain
Why would you do this to me? You ask
As the density of gaea stares back at you, poignant and all knowing

And when you have finally found solace in the bottom
When it seems all but impossible that you should fall further
The curse of time seems to swallow you whole
Bringing your shattered form to a hollow peace
Still; complacent in your new found pain
Surrounded by a void that lacks compassion
There are no victims here

Immediately the denial of truth
Denial of the fact that feeling overtakes reason
Replacing the knowledge that nature had put in you
About how very small and temporary everything is
Your broken biology still wrecked across identifiable anguish
And yet, you yearn for everything that hurts
Within the abyss, filled with both ending and infinite beginning
Only one constant remains; nothing


I want everything, here and now
I want everything so that I may never be fed this hurt again
Gluttonously we consume any and all remaining sensation
So that our new form, our new self, maybe be satiated
As it arrives, unwelcome, into this world
Eat, and fill
So that you may find normalcy in this new forsaken world

There is no me, there is no you
There is only the endless murderous maelstrom
Of life becoming unlife, and crawling its way back to the surface
Undermining and crusading all that has never felt pain
And as the innocent falls anew into the ever lasting caverns of hellscape
We are born anew

Destined to live and die a thousand deaths before our end truly comes
Predetermined to live by the inevitable
Tactfully designed to deceive, by any means, for as long as possible
Only then, having faced the grimness of truth
Are we completely human

Sleep does not come easy to me, if at all
Quite often i find myself merely in a stasis
Un-moving, un-thinking, muscles completely still
Dreams came to me often; before
Beautiful machinations of my subconscious would wing their way to the front of my eyes
Images of my once very real fears would mix and mingle with the deepest desires of my heart
The balance of waking mind given reckless abandon within the confines of my mind
Some nights i would see faces of people i have never formally met, but i would look upon them like ive always known them
Other times i would escape the tendrilite grasp of mortal life and i would be swept away into the air on gorgeous white wings; looking with my own eyes down onto the earth
And a few times i would feel, oh so vividly, the touch of a woman
My hands, much like talons, taking her like she was my own
Engorging myself with a rare opportune moment of per self centeredness and greed

However fragile peace may be, it was the last bastion of mortality i had
Fortune would not have it; i would never again have a dream
Sleep was the last to leave me
I cant remember the last time i shut my eyes
I havent a single shred of memory for what it is to awaken
A single notebook is all that remains of my dreams

And reading them has become a small, fleeting task
Something to simply fill time
For each time i do it, it is new
Reading a fraction of my former life is like meeting a stranger
In hopes that maybe the dream i share with all those around me will end
Someday i will wake up, and perhaps then i will die

Maybe when i finally forget everything, all things of what it is to be
Perhaps i will die, and be born again
I can only hope to awaken, to know that things have changed

Food is very clearly one of life's greatest pleasures
Before my immortality had revealed itself, when i could taste
I would eat the most delicious food
Flavors are something i miss the most
Roasted duck breast, brazed boar, steamed broccoli, sauteed mushrooms
Spiced rice, beef bourguignon, warm soft bread
The sensation of chewing, feeling sinews of meat rip and tear against my teeth
Letting taste fill my pallet
Feeling my belly fill with fresh hot food, satiating the human desire to feed
But many years ago taste began to abandon me
It maddened me; i gorged myself
Ate everything i could to try and taste
Drank far beyond when a normal man would have died
My appetite grew and went to strange places
Desperation consumed me and my mind caved inward
I began abducting people
Of vastly different ages
Having them eat food so that i may watch
Sometimes i would have them feed me
Eventually i turned to eating my victims
In a desperate attempt to gain my lost sensation
The young, the old, the unborn, the dead
My early decent into never ending life was a torrential madness
It ruined my mind
Only after having eaten my entire household inhabitants
Did i confront, no, transform into the entity i am now
Among very few things, I remember taste the most
But i miss it the least
A simple joy, lead me to the most distorted, darkest, insanity

The Immortal Melting Man no.5
On the rarest occasions I tend to wander toward the market
It provides me a mild form of entertainment
All ways of life flow through here
And i get to decipher what their existence means
I never buy anything, although the vendors and salesman
Try so very hard to get me to do so
Its simply astonishing the value people put in money, breathe taking even
One could easily argue its god made manifest
No one thing has lead to so much
Greatness, madness, death
Money is the most merciless of powers
It can even move land and oceans
Make anyone do virtually anything
And, so ive gathered, who so ever has the most wins the game of life
As if to say, i am god, i am the best, my life has value
As if to say, the very point of your being is measured in how many little green gods you can hold at one time