people live their lives
while i sit here sentimental

I’m feeling very human, suddenly
A new revelation, I’ve been waiting for it
I feel connected to grass and
Connected to my hands
And I can feel my love even though
I am unloved
It still overflows, in spite of it
I am so alone
I feel so connected
Like I could be part of the wind
Blowing through
Feeling everything
Without touching a thing

New York has this certain smell that I just haven't gotten used to
Although it isn't particularly bad
Like old clothes and old land and
Sewing needles and wool jackets
That you bought at the thrift store
While you were downtown freezing
You could've sworn it was 60 degrees that day
It smells of eating rice each day for lunch
And cheap dining hall cake
And the wind doesn't smell like the lake
And the lake doesn't smell like the sioux
And there's more color in the trees here
And you can't help but smell that too

i want to see the world
the way you do, my dear
i want to see the stars
and wonder endlessly
and not yearn quite so much
to die

i want to cry when i look
at the texture of a brick
because it looks so real
and supports my weight

i want to look for beauty
and not feel despair
at every sign of goodness

i want to yearn and long
without this terrible guilt

i want to love and fear this life

and experience everything for the first time

again