I think very often of our pain
I think very often. why can't we care for each other
What is it that stops us
What is it that holds me back from holding you and holding them
and what stops them from letting go
letting go
To give up
and give your hand
and live instead
and live with compassion

She hears me not when I call
for her but when I call her name
I see the lines that catch around
her frame, but cannot see her face
I think to speak although she's nowhere near
And dare to dream although I know
she lies awake
in hopes to lie alone and lie for long
Along that growl that she hides behind her
dully, she stares, nothing
And I see it
And I know
She won't let me pry myself apart
but shes gone from me

Smooth and undefined
My pen is unguided
My papers scratched apart
I fear the tear in the white
but I ruin it still

I think one of these days I might try to rhyme

Horribly hollow
I face the bell jar
with daydreams of face paint
And a pair of nail clippers

I feel like doing something horrible
But I cannot let it out
So I let it harbor
It is a blow
That I can redirect to my gut
Save you lest it collapses me

my sister is gone
and the cat is gone
and my brother is gone
and my mother's been knocked out since noon