When we first met
I fell in love
Yes
Love
The kind of love that changes a persons view of love
The kind of love that made you question if you have ever been in love
Before
The kind of LOVE that was impossible
And I hadn't even talk to you yet
I was so nervous
I wanted to leave
But ****
It was to late you saw me
And you smiled and that was it
I walked over
Well more like gravity pulled me to you
Like an inescapable force
That I did not want to escape
Impossible man
Is this fate

I told you no
But you said yes
And now some nights are filled with unrest
I guess
I should feel blessed
Because I'm alive
I mean sure my lifes a mess
And I can't get you out of my head
And sometimes
I wish you were dead
I don't let people touch me
Unless I've had a drink
And I can't think
So I don't remember
And what you took
I can never get back
And that's something
I hate that fact

They told me that the devil was beautiful
How right they were

I am excited
I swear
But every year
Im getting closer
And it scares me
I want a time machine
To go back and look at my life
I want to see every birthday
I ever had
But mostly
I just want to see my dad

I woke up today and something was different
My heart no longer ached in a lonely way
My head no longer screamed at me that I am nothing
My stomach didn't turn with the thought of tomorrow
And my feet didn't hesitate to walk the floor
The path I hiked,  painstakingly, was clear of the forest
I can breathe