Michael Stefan

Michael Stefan Jan 2021

Do you ever think the neighbors shout,
"See them there, through open window yonder?"
As we stand, threadbare and proud
No worldly inhibitions betwixt us
A stunning glory of aging pale flesh-
Moving with the rhythm of primal desire
And the fiercest of loyalties

Let the neighbors avert their eyes
As our combined gasps come crashing-
A tidal wave of passion-
Set to annoy these quiet streets

I wish the neighbors knew the truth,
I don't feel a drop of shame
For the things, I do with you
As you arch your back
Against my chest-
My fingers tangled through your hair
A beast both achingly hungry-
And filled with contentment

I hope the neighbors see,
When they shout to one another,
"See them there, through open window yonder"
The burning heat of our desire,
Manifests as growing steam-
A collapsing view on foggy surface
Punctuated by your clenching palms
And my big shoulders-
As love demands, we switch positions

*** as the physical expression of love and desire are key parts of a healthy relationship. When you find the right person, your inhibitions begin to fade. Those moments when you are truly ****; mind, body, and soul are truly freeing to the human spirit and truly wondrous in their effects on a relationship. Find your partner in crime.

Michael Stefan Jan 2021

Just a Taste

You're a ******* fool
If you bite a lemon
And pray for the taste-
Of rosemary and sage

So... Uh... Yeah. Just my thoughts on the subject.

Michael Stefan Jan 2021

Who Told You to Run? - Military Recovery Sessions #3

everyday
you're told
to wake up
get moving
pick that up
put that down
don't be late
best be early
best be quick
best be strong
go that way
stop right there
take that hill
stop that man
see that flag
tear it down
--------------
but which direction
do you run
when no one
holds the key?
can I run
if no one
told me to?

Integration is *******. A loss of schedule and purpose is cited as the leading cause of suicide in military Veterans'. Hug a Veteran that you know and tell them, "You march to the beat of your own drum. Now and forever. And I'll always be your running partner."

Michael Stefan Jan 2021

Made of Sterner Stuff - Military Recovery Sessions #2

We all stood at battlements,
And frontline racetracks
Preparing for the longest night
When we would kiss our mothers
And say our prayers,
Hoping to be ushered
Into a brilliant light,
So bright it cleans the soul

Taut muscles and furrowed brows,
Aching with the weight,
And slick with burning sweat-
Bourne under my burden
We all stared hard-
Into the face of hate
For a government that told us nothing
And said, "You gotta fight."

Brothers and sisters stood strong-
Strongest thing you ever saw
Each of them made
Of sterner stuff
They draped that uniform
On mountains made of duty
And jawlines set-
Of utter determination

And yet,
I buckle-
Praying for the support
Of my sisters and brothers,
The comfort of the desert sands-
Whilst I wither beneath the gaze
Of a woman who's coffee order
Did not contain almond milk-
Like the end of the world rested on the edge of her cup...

I did want this to be a little humorous but still speak to the camaraderie and sacrifice that each person in the military makes. We go through so many hard situations that we never prepare for the simple frustrations of a normal life. Then BAM! You are hit in the face by situations you never thought you would see. Situations the average person doesn't bat an eye at.

Michael Stefan Jan 2021

She's a Cutter - Military Recovery Sessions #1

She plunged it in, alright
A tight twist to a tiny hand,
With no solemn apology...
Such harsh and hard steel-
Such hard and harsh cuts-
To such soft flesh,
Now marred by red ruts

She never whimpered,
She never groaned,
She never smiled,
She never moaned.
She stood in one place,
As she let the blade slide,
And felt not a thing
As the knife slid inside

She remained like a statue-
So still like the steel,
Examining the accurate
Lines she had made.
And in one brief moment
She stole a glance from her place
To check the oxygen mask
Secured to my face

First, sorry if the beginning triggered anyone. I wanted this to be a little misleading. This is the first installment of the experiences I had exiting the military. I had some severe spinal surgeries, ultimately leading to my medical discharge. Please read the poems to follow this one.

Michael Stefan Jan 2021

This Broken Toy

For all the lies you told
          While laying in an empty bed-
          You were never so good
          As you were,
          The night you floated away

                    You were like a stone,
                    Hit upon another stone,
                    Echoing through an empty hallway-
                    Your broken soul
                    Was only good
                    For breaking souls

                                                            You hurled glass-heavy bricks
                                                            Through my empty windows,
                                                            Tied on with love-notes,
                                                            Penned foul with fetid ink
                                                            And left-
                                                            Only to confuse the masses
                                                                 Of sad, stupid, people

                                        You built a paper-tiger army-
                                        Made to rush through flames,
                                        At the Chicago Fire battlefield
                                        You set in my heart,
                                        While children sold a solemn pitcher
                                        Of kerosene-laced gasoline-
                                        For every thirsty watcher

You bled out oxygen,
And complained,
When you nor I
Could breathe.
My bandage never had a hope,
Or chance to adhere

                                                                         You spoke a tragic song
                                                                         Like a caged bird-
                                                                         Beating wings ******
                                                                         Against a solid freedom
                                                                         That you would rob from me

                                           You swung away from truth-
                                           Only the harshest reality
                                           Was a gift worth giving to me
                                           Much like an orphaned child,
                                           Handed a tattered box,
                                           Unwrapped to find a broken toy
                                           Who would never find a use

Sometimes, pulling the thread on a failed relationship to expose all the parts we didn't know leads to a myriad of emotion that's hard to sort through. Hopefully, this poem helps each of you as you ride that tidal wave of anger, sadness, mania, catatonia, relief, and disbelief... Take care and always lean on a friend that you trust.