Lumin Guerrero: Favorites

My danger

6h Lumin Guerrero

Liana

The dangerous thing for me is that I would die and excruciating death a thousand times just to make them smile once
And then I'll apologize if my screams from getting burned alive disrupted their sleep

The ones I love and care about

6h Lumin Guerrero

Me

6h Lumin Guerrero

Liana

Me

I am so much
I am too much
Too much everything
Clingy
Intense
Quiet
Loud
And I’m simultaneously somehow
Still not enough

Even though I just had a good time with a friend, I still feel like ****. I don’t understand why I’m like this. I hate myself.

6d Lumin Guerrero

Dear mother

6d Lumin Guerrero

Kaiden

Dear mother

Dear mother,
Is this what you wanted me to become?
With your lessons, abuse
Would you be proud of me if you saw what i turned into?

Dear mother,
Would you still love me
If i died as a foolish poet
At the age of 14?

Dear mother,
Would you look back at what you did,
And say it was right?
When you get a call that your child ended their life
Because of you,
Dear mother?

i wonder what my "dear mother" would think after seeing what i write ****, im a failure

#mother #abuse #neglect

6d Lumin Guerrero

Loneliness (revised)

6d Lumin Guerrero

Liana

Loneliness (revised)

Loneliness is a record player
Sitting in an attic
With no record

It is when you look into life’s mirror
And see you’re not alone
You see the monster of your mind creeping up behind you
Whispering loud enough that only you can hear

Loneliness is the loudest silent scream of them all
Yet no one can hear how loud you feel it
Through any bathroom stall

6d Lumin Guerrero

Can't cut

6d Lumin Guerrero

Liana

Can't cut

I can't cut
No more
No
No
No
I promised

But the feelings are so strong
Overflowing me
I need them to pour down my arm
And out of my body

I can't
I can't be that weak
I just need to breathe
...
My lungs fail me

But no
No
No
I can't reach for it
Not allowed
Not anymore
Done with that, right?
I really just want to grab the knife
Razor
Needle
Anything
And end this misery
At least soothe it a little

But no
No
No
No
I can't

Trying to quit so so hard, haven't done anything yet

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

Death

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

Liana

Death

"what do you wanna do, Liana?"
My mom asks me

"Death"
I respond

"Do you want to eat something?"

"No, I just want to die"

"What are you thinking about?"

"My death"

She laughs
Smiles
She doesn't understand
She doesn't want to understand I'm not joking
When I'm telling her

"What do you want to do tomorrow?"
She asks

"I don't want a tomorrow. I want to die"
I answer

She giggles
"That's not an option" she chuckles
She doesn't know

I'm not going to act on it as of now, but I crave it sometimes, you know? I feel like she doesn't get that I'm serious.

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

Oh to be loved

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

Liana

Oh to be loved

And I'm cold in my bed
Tired
Pillow covered in tears because that's where they're used to falling
And I just want to be loved

And I know I am by my friends
And my family
But I want to be stuck in someone's head
And I want them to rub my arm and make me a little bit less cold
And maybe have my tears land on their shoulder instead

I want to be the poem and not the poet for once

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

Lost

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

Kaiden

Lost

Lost in a world i knew so well,
Locked myself up in my own hell,
Losing friends,
Hoping that it finally ends,
And sets me free from my own prison.

False beliefs,
Trying to find relief from the grief
Of an alive person,
A brother, a son,
He's still here,
But i believe he's gone.

i might take a break from writing (i know i keep saying this, i'm sorry) because i quite literally went into psychosis and i can barely function, not even mentioning writing. btw yes, im getting help, it just doesn't really work tbh

#lost

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

thin wires

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

Vesper

thin wires

i'm made of thin wires
snapping one by one
every time you tell me
that i'm not good enough

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

ugly

Jun 20 Lumin Guerrero

ȧ ų ǥ ų ṣ ⱦ

ugly

what an ugly person.
they look so stupid.
it makes me angry.
i want to **** them.
why do they still live?
they don't deserve to.
i punch them,
and the mirror shatters,
the shards lined with blood.

#ihatemyself