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Nov 2014 · 272
Happiness is a Gift
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I asked for happiness on my sixteenth birthday.
That is far from what I got.
Sixteen year old me ended up in a dark place,
With frightening people.
And here I am, seventeen,
Falling ever deeper into the darkness.

Maybe if I'd never asked for happiness,
It wouldn't have been this bad.
Maybe I wouldn't have met that man,
And he wouldn't have done what he did.
Maybe if I'd learned to be happy instead of just asking for it,
I would be happy today.
Nov 2014 · 289
An Hourglass
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Can you tell me that there aren't any monsters in this world?
For I see reflected in others's eyes,
The end of time.
Time
Is
Out.
For us to live,
We must learn to survive.
These monsters will never leave us in peace, for we are them.
I tried...
Nov 2014 · 469
Burning Thoughts
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I wrote a poem,
just so I could set it on fire.
I hope my words burn
in your soul
and set your mind a light.
Remember me,
when the embers go out.
Nov 2014 · 303
Mourning the Morning
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Why do mourning and morning
sound so alike?

For mourning is the kind
of thing
for endings

And mornings
Are more like
Beginnings
Nov 2014 · 1.7k
Lilacs
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Lilacs were always my favorite flower.
The flower of my childhood.
The purple stars bloomed in the briar of my backyard.
Fragrant and light, Violet in color,
I would skip around the beautiful colors.
They say they stand for youthful innocence.
What a shame that flowers and I can no longer relate,
For my innocence is long gone,
And my youth is fading fast.
The funny thing is,
The color, lilac,
Used to be a color of mourning.
Nov 2014 · 216
Between the Silences
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Between the silences is the pitiful exchange
We sit, stiff backed, in plastic chairs.
I don't want to talk to you,
your attempts to make conversation
are all but ignored.
Tight lipped, I turn away.
To think you could make me better.
Nov 2014 · 343
Amusing Deceptions
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I find it funny, you see,
how they call me "cute" and "adorable",
for if they saw my heart,
My rotten and bruised heart,
They'd choose far different words.
Nov 2014 · 191
Good Enough
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I used to believe that achieving one goal was enough,
Be content that you could get there.
But that is wrong.
I will do whatever it takes to be the best.
For good enough isn't good enough for me.
I will never be fine with being good enough.
I must be the best.
As a musician, I know just how much being the best means and I know what it's like to be good enough. Even, not quite good enough.
Nov 2014 · 205
Bells
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Do you hear the bells ring?
For I hear them,
on this the day of death.
Sand blows in the wind,
the bells toll and never stop.
Can't you hear them?
Everything is ending,
we will not survive.
The bells warn us,
Why don't you hear them?
You must be lying!
I hear them clear as day!
The bells are ringing and
we will die!
The bells, they...
The sudden end is intentional.
Nov 2014 · 545
Peachy
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
"Are you okay?"
No, not really. "of course! Everything is peachy!"
Lies, they should be evident,
but they are not, it seems.
I am drowning in my own self hatred.
Demoralized by life, but of course,
I'll just tell you that I am okay.
Nov 2014 · 414
Hell on Earth
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I called out to God, to any god,
begging to be saved.
Don't let me die like this.
And I did not die,
but I certainly wasn't saved.
This world is hell,
and it's clear that no one is listening.
Nov 2014 · 592
Sickening (10 Words)
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Don't you agree that human beings are truly disgusting creatures?
Nov 2014 · 184
Nothing.
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I cried out to a merciless God.
Trapped beneath a dark monster,
pleading for freedom.
When you lose faith,
You have nothing.
That monster took everything
I had and nothing remains.
Nov 2014 · 593
An Empty Glass
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
They drank the wine of life,
The sweetness, the good times,
A glass half full, or a glass half empty.
They picked it up and poured away the good
and the hope that had colored the glass.
Nothing was left but an empty glass.
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Well, things have changed now.
Not really, they haven't.
I assume you're doing well.
Don't assume things, I'm not.
The therapy must have helped you.
As if I could forget what was done to me.
I just knew you could be happy again.*
Do you listen to anything? I am not happy.
How dare you come here and expect me to magically be better?
Did you think I'm not forever scarred by what he did?
I wish I could forgive the world, but I cannot.
Nov 2014 · 285
Her Smile
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Her smile never quite reached her eyes
And she ended up looking disgusted with the world,
Rather than happy.
Nov 2014 · 670
I Try So Hard
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I try so hard
to write beautiful poems,
to write happy poems.

I want so much
to seem happy,
to be okay.

I try so hard
to write happy poems
and yet, they're always fake.
Nov 2014 · 173
The Quiet Ones
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Those who are quiet,
are silent for a reason.
Those who don't speak
without cause and thought,
They are important.
Listen when the quiet ones speak
For wisdom and kindness float from their tongues.
Nov 2014 · 624
Hold Your Breath
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I asked you to wait for me.
Many say, "Don't hold your breath."
They call me a wild card,
A damaged, dangerous creature.
I'm the kind of girl
who will hold your head under water
That is what they think.
Wait for me, though.
Hold your breath for I will be back,
if only to drown you.
Nov 2014 · 246
Night Tears
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Lately I wake up in the night
and find my pillow
wet with my grief.
Sobbing in my sleep;
that can't be healthy.
I hope dreams don't predict the future.
Nov 2014 · 227
Looking for Friends
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Take a left at the willow tree
if you're intent on coming.
A picnic we shall have,
but only if you bring a sweet snack.
We can sit in the shade of my favorite oak
if you aim to be my friend.
I've been looking for company
not that I mind being alone, of course.
Please be my friend.
*I won't ask again.
Nov 2014 · 923
Prompt #3: Lies
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I believe in love and light and life.
Happiness is found in everyone, everywhere.
I know I'll go to heaven,
I want a long happy life, as a housewife.
A charming husband and two sweet children.
That is what I want.
My dream life.
Prompt: Wrote a poem about yourself in which nothing is true.
Nov 2014 · 321
The Abyss
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
This unfathomable chasm,
obscures all rationality.
I slip into madness
the murkiness  revealing certain oblivion.
All I can fathom is darkness,
for all I know is the obscurity of this void.
As aware as I am of my mortality,
I do not want to die here.
Please, save me as I fall into the abyss.
Inspired by a line from Poe's "The Pit and the Pendulum"
"An outstretched arm caught my own as I fell fainting into the abyss."
Nov 2014 · 253
A Love Poem
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
The title lies, my dear.
For all you ever want are love poems.
Perhaps if you had known me in a different time,
before I forgot how to love,
I could write a poem that would bring tears to your eyes.
But you know me now, you only know me as I am,
And it is childish, indeed, to believe that I could love you.
Be assured, it is not only you,
for I am cold and cannot love a soul,
Not even myself.
Nov 2014 · 571
I Hate You
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
With every fiber of my being,
I hate you.
I hate what you did to me.
You treated me like a *****,
and called me one, too.
Does a ***** fight like I did?

I ******* hate you with every bone in my body.
I hope someone sets you on fire.
I'm not who I used to be,
because you couldn't control your lust.
You *******, give me back what you stole.
This emptiness burns for your head on a stick.

The violence of how you treated me
is echoed in my hatred for you.
I am not the kind of girl who has such bloodlust.
And yet, I lust for your blood for it will rectify my pain.
My blood spilled on the pavement,
Bruises that blossomed beneath my skin.
Nov 2014 · 323
Death is a Person, too
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
He smirked at me, surprised by my sass, even in death.
Death wore a suit, looking every bit the striking businessman.
He held a heavy tome as he read my name, telling me it was not my time.
Leaning in the crook of his arm was the sharp scythe, glimmering faintly.
Death touched my face with his cold hands, his fingers brushing across my delicate lips, and under my chin.
He made me look into his eyes and spoke gently,
"It is not your time. I will see you again, but today is not the day."
A tear ran down my cheek and his icy fingers wiped it away.
Death leaned forward, his presence bringing cold and dread.
With his frosty lips, he tenderly kissed my forehead.
He kissed down my face, leaving a chill with each touch.
Death's mouth met mine as he breathed life back into me.
Everything went dark, and I sat up with a start, alone in my cold bed.
Nov 2014 · 235
Follow Me
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
"Follow me, " she said, as she danced through the garden.
Flittering wings and a tinkling laugh,
I followed her, enchanted.
The flowers bloomed as she passed,
The air filling with the scent of spring.
She led me to her garden
and taught me to love again,
Nov 2014 · 785
Not Quite Human
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I am a monster.
Whether I was born one,
Or became one does not matter.

I never wanted this.
I hurt myself,
This pain spreading to others.

They want to help me
Or so they say.
I fear them.

I fear them as they fear me.
Their fear surfaces as anger.
A mob at my door to burn me at the stake.

My fear surfaces as pain.
Pain and loneliness.
I shall remain in my castle.

For I am a monster.
I only cause others pain.
It's best if I'm alone.
Nov 2014 · 1.1k
Shaking Hands
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
He wanted to hold her hand
but his hands shook with
the memories of his childhood.
The musty room, clouded
with the sweet stink cigar smoke.
His father who stank of acrid alcohol
And a voice that rumbled like thunder.
The crack of the belt across his skin.

She wanted to hold his hand
but her hands shook with
the all too recent past.
The man who claimed to love her
but dragged her down the stairs by her hair
if she wouldn't lie with him or play housewife.
His bitter breath on her neck,
and the bruises he left on her skin.

Shaking hands, various pasts.
Maybe if both our hands shake,
We won't notice our own pain.
Nov 2014 · 484
He has Anger for Eyes
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I saw the devil in your eyes.
You looked into mine,
your hand wrapped around my neck.
I whimpered in fear,
Not because I knew what you had planned,
but because I saw the danger in your eyes.
Nov 2014 · 323
Falling Apart
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
Lately, she sighs with the passing hour.
Time crawls by at a snail's pace,
and yet it is a whirlwind of activity.
She watches as the day passes her by
and her limbs move slowly
through the heavy fog of exhaustion.
Dark circles hang heavily,
shadowing her eyes from the world.
Her jagged nails are her only source of comfort
as her nervous habit of biting them has returned.
The world is cruel to the innocent,
and only ceases when
it has broken those who least deserve it.
In Fate's spiteful eyes, she is sufficiently broken.
Nov 2014 · 321
Untitled #5
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I don't believe in love.
Never once have I felt that spark.
The fluttering, the happiness,
That doesn't exist.  

The men I have known,
have not been kind.
The gentleman with the soft kiss,
He doesn't exist.
Nov 2014 · 274
Tired
Liz And Lilacs Nov 2014
I've grown weary of the daily grind.
Tired of the constant work, so many expectations.
I cannot meet all of them, not at once.
I'm drained by this life.
I'm not sure how much
longer before I collapse.
I'm done with this life,
I just want to rest,
an untroubled sleep.
Oct 2014 · 861
Little Things
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
I get a little sad,
at little times,
over little things.

Little things like my friends
ignoring me and talking over me.

Little things like being alone
in a room full of people.

Sometimes it's the little things,
that make me smile on
the darkest days, waking me
from my sleepy stupor.

Little things like someone
who holds the door.

Little things like sharing
a smile with a stranger.

It's the little things
that mean the most
in this little, cruel world.
This little blue dot.
Try doing something little for someone today. A little thing for you might mean the world to them.
Oct 2014 · 447
Requiem
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
Would you compose a requiem for me?
It's clear that my soul is dead and gone.
For my spirit, repose and tranquility.
Do not spurn the dead, for my body remains.
Vengeance, I foresee.
What you did will not be forgiven.
Oct 2014 · 647
Confused
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
I cannot distinguish
between love and hate.

For after you kiss me,
you say that you hate me.

And after you hit me,
you say that you love me.

Something just doesn't seem quite right.
Oct 2014 · 426
Untitled #4
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
Who would have though that
we could hate ourselves this much?

Red scars stand out vividly against pale skin,
protruding bones jut out from your smooth body,
the bitter smell of alcohol on your breath,
and acrid cigarette smoke pouring your delicate nose.

This self loathing,
this self hatred,
this anger that we can't be perfect,
gives us an excuse to destroy ourselves.
Oct 2014 · 694
Untouchable
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
They had the gall to throw me from the top.
Sending me crashing to the bottom of the heap.
An untouchable, they say.
How dare they call me such,
after all I have done for them?

The weight of the society,
left to the untouchables
to bear upon their shoulders.
They refuse to even help me from the ground.
The call me *****, worthless.

I am certain my hands are cleaner than theirs,
for the blood of the innocent does not ***** my hands.
I am certain that I am not worthless,
for I do the jobs that no one else will.
Yet they call me untouchable.
Oct 2014 · 1.4k
A Rabbit and The Blue One
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
He was blue, she was rabbit.
He danced a waltz around her mind,
she could never quite escape his grasp.
Her fruitless attempts to forget
his hypnotizing colors left her broken.

He was blue, she was a rabbit.
She danced a waltz across his heart.
But he was azure, and could never love.
Cold and empty, he thought of her,
but the feelings never truly reached him.

He was blue, she was a rabbit.
She followed him through the flowery gardens.
He seemed everywhere at once.
Enchanted, she bounded across the dewy grass.
Her love was in the sky and in the flowers.

He was blue, she was rabbit.
He acknowledged her each time she passed,
But he was everywhere and could not love.
He watched from a distance as she pranced.
As he weeped, the rain fell and the rabbit hid away.

He was blue and she was a rabbit.
They could never quite be together
despite being in the same place.
For he was blue, the blue of the sky,
and she was a rabbit, a creature of the Earth.
Oct 2014 · 747
Beautiful
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
He called me beautiful.
"You're so beautiful", said he.
It should have been sweet,
a compliment to flow off one's tongue,
but I knew what he wanted.

His lustful lies are empty
to my delicate heart.
I know better than to fall
for the charming prince
with the beautiful words.
Oct 2014 · 292
Growing Up Too Soon
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
I grew up fast.
I went to meetings with my father,
begged my mother to stop shouting.

I would lay awake at night,
listening to them argue.
My unversed brain not understanding.

I grew up too fast.
Relentlessly hoping for happiness,
always trying to be better.

I wanted to make everyone happy
And in doing so,
I lost my own happiness.
My words never quite match the emotions in my head.
Oct 2014 · 396
A Prodigy
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
They once called me a prodigy,
Telling me of the great future
that they had planned for me.

I wanted to be free,
To do what I wanted,
To make my own future.

So I burned all my music,
And locked up the piano.
Stayed away from my life.

I can't bring myself to forget it.
I didn't realize I would miss it.
Perhaps they knew what was meant for me.
Oct 2014 · 251
Sleeping Insomnia
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
I woke up in pain today.
I can't say I'm surprised.
Sleep isn't rest anymore,
and my dreams are
no longer peaceful.

Exhaustion takes over,
Nightmares linger.
But are they nightmares?
They're memories.
Guilt. Fear. Sadness.
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
I listen to the silence of the night that isn't truly quiet.
I listen to sobs of the lost children.
I listen to the prayers of the disgraced.
I listen to the whispered gossip of the upperclass.
I listen to the gasps of pain from the damaged.
I listen to the rejoiced cries of the fortunate.
I listen to the cracks of souls shattering.
I listen to the lewd moans of lovers embracing.
I listen to the forsaken sighs of the companionless.
I listen for you, but cannot seem to hear.
Prompt: Write ten lines, each starting with "I listen ..."
Oct 2014 · 322
Prompt #1: Am I a monster?
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
I always considered myself
a little messed up.
I never meant to hurt anyone,
but it seems I have.
Myself and others,
drowning in my monstrosity.

I never wanted to be monster
but I've lost sight of my humanity.
The pain I cause is always regretted,
but never enough to satisfy.
Who is the monster and who is the man?
I am both and he who made me this way is too.
Prompt: Write a poem about what makes a monster a monster.
Oct 2014 · 434
The Creep
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
I'm coming for you
Ten.
Quickening breath.
Nine.
Racing heart
Eight.
Creaky floor.
You can't hide, little lady
Seven.
Quiet whimper.
Six.
Silent gulp.
I like these games, my pretty
Five.
Shadowy figures.
Four.
Hear the whispers.
The thing is, I always win.
Three.
Closed eyes.
Two.
Heart in throat.
Found you.*
One.
Blood curdling scream.
Well, this is a creepy thing. Happy Halloween?
Oct 2014 · 837
An End
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
Death is upon us all on this dark day.
Death is upon us all on this dark
Death is upon us all on this
Death is upon us all on
Death is upon us all
Death is upon us
Death is upon
Death is
Death.
Oct 2014 · 1.3k
Cranberry Droplets
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
Bloodlust is all I see.
These droplets, like cranberry constellations,
dotting my bibliography.

I am nobody's fool,
yet you've bamboozled me.
A walking contradiction.

Demented or balanced,
I no longer know.
Your bloodlust concerns me.
Oct 2014 · 1.2k
Do you like my socks?
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
Do you like my socks?
I asked as I stood there
in comical socks and
my colorful ******.
You smirked and I laughed
as you examined my knee highs.
Childish, not fitting of the moment
Let me take them off for you,*
You said with a voice as soft as a feather and silky as your skin.
Oct 2014 · 713
Icarus
Liz And Lilacs Oct 2014
Like Icarus, we fly
too close to the sun
or too close to the sea.

The highs and the lows
The good and the bad
There is no in between.

Life is a game,
A game of extremes.
And we don't know how to win.

But you know what they say:
What goes up,
*must come down.
I hope you all know your Greek mythology
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