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i prayed every night:
when morning comes
don’t wake me up.

& i woke up
every morning.

i don’t know
what to believe in anymore.
I’m trying so hard to maintain the flame
But my candle continues to flicker.
I’ve shielded it from the heaviest winds
But the breezes of sameness assail it.
I can’t see my way if it goes out completely
With darkness now poised to swoop in.
ljm
Health problems that cause depression.
Looking for a sign that I’m heard-
Is it a bird outside my window,
A shaft of sunrise in my sky.
Is it a song come out of nowhere
Remembered and sung word for word.
How can you recognize a sign
When you don’t know what you’re looking for.
ljm
Is God listening?
A year is going to die
but its memories will stay
in the times ahead.

The success, the failure, the try
will be there next day,
the worries to carry to bed.

But over all else
the love I got
will still warm my heart.

As certain as time sails
what can't be bought
will be life's special part.

Was I as generous in giving
for this special gift I received
was I as kind?

The question is haunting
though I tried indeed
my best wasn't good enough I find.

Forgive me where I failed
didn't shine in the light
you let me be in.

I promise to make amend
and keep it in sight
loving you more is all I mean.
Tears from the mystical sky
seeped in through my shoulder—
as I let its fervor tears
dampen my lowly soul;
he said, “hear me out”

The way it moves around
sailing toward to broaden
mysterious mists—the plastic clouds
covering most of the gleam of the sun
and the way he murmurs into my ears—
I can never get out again.

While strange stares pierced through
my core—a menacing way of
forcing unraveling fragile pieces
of my silent port, and there I
let a foreign one
travel his way through—
sailing beneath my springs.

On this day of August's chilly afternoon—
while the tears of the mystical sky
tumbles through my shoulder—dripping
my cold dry bones.
after a week of not writing.
There she was
Walking in the light
Disguised as an angel
Near the lake
Of shining waters
While her hair
Smells like an old flower
In the moonlight

There she was
Peeking through your dreams
While you close your eyes
In her lullabies

There she was
Singing in the light
Like an ocean's roar
In the night

Close your eyes
She's now leaving
In the quiet sound
Of the night

Close your eyes
She's an angel in disguise.
It was a poem first, before I turned into a song.
I stood in the hallway,
the familiar scent of jasmine hanging heavy—
my mother’s perfume.

I called her name,
but it wasn’t the voice of my mother
that answered.

It was mine—
but younger.

I turned the corner,
and there she was—
sitting at the kitchen table,
but her eyes…
they weren’t hers anymore.

"I’ve waited for you,"
she whispered,
and the room went cold.

I reached for her,
but my fingers sank into her skin—
soft, pliable,
like wax—
too easy.

And I realized too late—
she wasn’t waiting for me.
She was pulling me in.

Then I felt it—
a slow, unbearable pressure in my chest.
I couldn’t breathe.

"You’ll never leave me again."
Standing on the edge
One step away from
Falling into the unknown
One step away from
Losing control
One step away from
Letting go
One step away from
Not feeling anymore.
My lover has crossed the sea, the great blue sea,
where the waves rise high and the gulls fly free.
With salt on his skin and wind in his hair,
he left me standing, silent, and bare.

The tide it pulls, the tide it sways,
stealing the light from my weary days.
I trace his name in the shifting sand,
only to watch it slip from my hand.

The moon whispers secrets across the deep,
as I sit alone where the cold winds weep.
Does he think of me when the stars ignite?
Or am I a shadow lost to the night?

Oh, sea so wide, oh, sea so tall,
have you no mercy, none at all?
Carry him back, bring him to me,
my heart is adrift, lost at sea.
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