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77 · Mar 2021
To whom it may concern:
Justin S Wampler Sep 2022
This road of indecision
I often find myself on
is paved with countless carcasses
of squirrels and deer aplenty.

They all watch me make my way,
their eyes still brimming
with high beams and headlights.

I can hear the faint echoes
of a thousand car horns
resonating within me.

Pizza?
Wings?
Left?
Right?
I don't know.
You decide.
77 · Feb 2022
Hand in hand
Justin S Wampler Feb 2022
**** man.
I literally can't stop drinking.

I took a day off,
yesterday.
But it don't matter.

I was bitter and angry
all day today.

So I grabbed a bottle
on my way home.

I'm an alcoholic.

But I'm a poet too?
77 · Oct 2021
Cell
Justin S Wampler Oct 2021
The irresistible compulsion.

In my mind's eye
I've already taken my brittle phone,
grasped it longways
and slammed it repeatedly upon the edge of my desk.

My beautiful mind's eye,
It shows me the gruesome satisfaction
of so many bittersweet actions
that I dare not take.

Even as I write this.
As I live
and breathe.
How wondrous it would be,
free of this digital monarchy.
How magnificent a scene;
my cell phone split in twain.
But..
Alas, nary a second would pass,
we're I to destroy this rectangular glass,
without me wondering
if all was well.

Maybe once my family is dead,
Or maybe not so dramatic...
Maybe if I get a land line instead...
Then I could relish the taste
of destroying something
I truly do hate.
77 · Feb 2022
Eyes don't matter.
Justin S Wampler Feb 2022
There's a sinking ship
beneath our feet.

We don't notice it though,
we can't see.

Busy playing in the metaphysical dirt,
busy tumbling gravel and stones from our shoes.
Busy. Too busy.

What do you notice
first thing
on a Sunday morning?

That's all that
ever really matters.
76 · Dec 2020
Teamwork
Justin S Wampler Dec 2020
Never wanted to cook before.
Never wanted to cook.
76 · Nov 2021
One day at a time
Justin S Wampler Nov 2021
I think about my next drink
because I drink so I don't have to think.
I'm so over these hours spent sober,
when will this sober be over?
I take a nip but the bottle bites back,
I bite the bottle and I chew up the glass.
I'm never hung over with dread
because responsibilities hang over my head.
I know what I need to do,
do you know that the ***** needs me too?
In a bittersweet twist of fate
for every drink that I take
the drink takes a sip out of me,
and although I've plenty ***** left
my mind's now mostly empty.
76 · Apr 2021
Bind
Justin S Wampler Apr 2021
Maybe if you weren't so pretty when you cry
I wouldn't feel compelled to be so cruel.
Justin S Wampler Nov 2021
Yes,
my tastes are shallow.
Although still deep enough
to drown myself in.

Been looking for
a specific type of gal:
a delicate flower
that can take
a hard *******.

Pretty, yet sturdy.
Crystalinne,
but not brittle.
Loving,
but willing
to hate-**** me
when I forget
to take the trash out.
Or when she catches me
eyeing another woman's ***.

Bring me your finest spite,
pour it over me
in a liquid display
of primal ecstasy.
76 · Jun 2021
Rattle
Justin S Wampler Jun 2021
Jacketed in scale.
Wire wheel.
Self-etching primer.
New seals.
One coat,
high temp enamel.
Paint it black,
hit the track.
76 · Dec 2020
Lucidity
Justin S Wampler Dec 2020
It's like a dream.

Only I'm not sure
If I'm fast asleep,

Or

If I just woke up.
76 · Oct 2021
Teeth
Justin S Wampler Oct 2021
One day you'll lie down tired,
albeit thoroughly satisfied.

Yet you'll still remember
those times.
75 · May 2021
Lost and found
Justin S Wampler May 2021
What defines it?
Is there an innate sense
of purpose
grafted into the drywall?
Is it an undefined longing
for solitude,
for a little time?

I'll find it.
Coated with pine needles,
desperate for fresh lumber.
I'll find it buried
beneath seven years of therapy,
slathered in liquid doubt.
Dripping.
I'll find it dripping.

I ain't looking any harder today
than I was yesterday,
but I swear that I'll find it.
75 · Jun 2021
Avarice
Justin S Wampler Jun 2021
Wide open.

The throttle.

The tap.

Whatever.
Whatever analogy floats your boat.

Let it flow,
let it
roar.

Watch the numbers shrink.
The gifted numbers,
the heirlooms,
the legacy of ancestors.

Watch the needle race from
full to empty.

Watch it all swirl
clockwise
down the metaphorical drain.

Find me sprawled.

Hungry.

Fiending.

Find me when it's all gone
and you won't even recognize me.

You'll look down,
pitiless,
and I won't even notice you were there.
75 · Dec 2021
Trigger
Justin S Wampler Dec 2021
There's a dog barking
and
I'm in a chasm.
My life is a chasm
and there are dogs
barking.

God, the incessantly persistent barking.

It echoes and
I'm barking,
the dog is a chasm.

I'm barking and echoing and
my head is ground into dust.
Eyes squinched shut,
nails dug into my palms.

I snap back to reality
with my hand on my gun.
My Springfield 9mm that I wear on my hip,
fully loaded. The grip is sweaty but the dog is gone.
The barking quiets.

I rummage through my memory
in search of
sleep.

Blessed sleep.
Zzz.

Woof

My eyelid twitches.
75 · Jul 2020
Blood and steel
Justin S Wampler Jul 2020
Grease, grime and filth
Black hands from all the silt
Knuckles busted
Bleeding thumb
Time to take this
Baby for a run
Starter up
Hop on in
Let's go around the block again
75 · Dec 2021
Fistfuls
Justin S Wampler Dec 2021
The only thing
I'm leaving behind,
is time.

Everything else
I've held onto
so dearly.

With a death grip
and cramping
hand muscles.

Blinded to
what's worth
reaching for,
for fear of
dropping
what I'm so
desperately
clutching.
75 · Jan 2022
Lone
Justin S Wampler Jan 2022
Bled it out, one,
one day at a time.

I shouted at you.

You didn't cry.

I don't find none,
none is what I find.

I tried for you.

You didn't try.

Bled it out one day,
one day without time.
74 · Dec 2021
Regular
Justin S Wampler Dec 2021
I found her behind the counter
at my local diner,
I found her deserving
of my most sincere wishes.

She smiled with a radiance
that I so craved to smother.

Her supple skin
and lively eyebrows
were a beautiful canvas
for three ropes
of my ***.

So beautiful.
74 · Nov 2020
Grand father
Justin S Wampler Nov 2020
Work ran late.

He's been waiting all day
To take me out for steaks.
I fumble my keyring
And pick it up again,
I always get his house key
Mixed up with mine.

Asleep on the couch,
A Hallmark movie
Playing unwatched on the TV.
He must've seen this one already.

"Hey."
I touch his shoulder
And smile at him when he looks up at me.
He smiles back.

I wonder if he still believes
In anything.

"You ready to rock & roll down to the Banquet?"
"Yeah man, I'm starving."
74 · Nov 2021
Busting nuts
Justin S Wampler Nov 2021
I feel like chunky peanut butter started out
as a failed batch of regular peanut butter,
and they were all like
"****. What do we do with all this
partially blended peanut butter?"
Then the suits probably figured:
"market it as intentional,
******* rubes will buy anything."
73 · Dec 2020
Candle stumps
Justin S Wampler Dec 2020
The cabinets are all closed,
But I still don't know
Where the dishes go.

Sneaky little memories.

Anxiety and coughing.

Staying up late
To *******.

Flashcards.

Whiskey.

Life rolls on I suppose.
73 · Oct 2020
Weight
Justin S Wampler Oct 2020
Man my back hurts
From carrying all of this
Right between my shoulder blades
I wish it would crack
And give me some relief
Because I've got years ahead of me
And I'll still be carrying all this

I can't let it go
Not now, not tomorrow,
Not twelve years ago
Justin S Wampler Sep 2020
I can put my boots on blind
Not adverse to working overtime
I'm up before the sun
Don't need to carry a gun
But baby at the end of the day
When I'm tired and sore
I get excited to keep on this way
Even as I start to snore
Cause money don't stretch a long way
When I want to buy so much more
73 · Dec 2021
Mundanity
Justin S Wampler Dec 2021
Been here before,
done this a thousand times.
Yet still I find
something new.
73 · Dec 2020
Gregory
Justin S Wampler Dec 2020
There's no real reason
That I never called my step father
'Dad.'
I came up with some throwaway line
When Mom asked me to call him that.
I was young, but I remember saying
Something along the lines of
"I respect my Dan more than I respect my Dad."
She must've thought that was adequate reasoning
Because she never brought it up again,
And I've called him Dan ever since.
I think now I may have missed out
On an opportunity, but there's no way to really know.
At the time I thought that
If he had been the one to come up to me
And ask me to call him Dad,
Then maybe my answer would've been different.

I can't decide whether
I never consider my biological father,
Or if I constantly think about him subconsciously.
I wish there had been a day when
He wasn't a kind and loving person to me.
I wish he would've been more obviously
Cruel,
Or sick.
People told me he was schizophrenic,
But that was never what I saw.
I only ever saw my Dad, y'know?
If he had been more obviously sick,
Or maybe if my memory wasn't clouded
By the idealistic, fuzzy veil of childhood,
Then maybe it would've been easier
To accept it when he told me he was leaving.
But when someone who only has ever loved you
Shows up one day just to
Say goodbye,
Well... I don't know.
I guess it makes it harder
To let go of hope.

I see a lot of him leaving,
In myself.
The idea of running away
Is appealing.
The prospect of chalking up my
Lack of responsibility
To something like a mental disorder,
Or wanting to be crazy,
Has always been so alluring.
I guess at the end of the day
Everyone wants to be like their Dad.
73 · Apr 2021
Dirt
Justin S Wampler Apr 2021
I was so ***** the other day;
I cleaned my **** off with a vacuum cleaner.
73 · Nov 2020
Giving thanks
Justin S Wampler Nov 2020
I'm slightly shameful
That it took great loss
For me to appreciate
The family I've got.

But maybe that's life,
And all that I can do
Is be here for who's left,
And be grateful for it too.
72 · Oct 2024
Financial risk.
Justin S Wampler Oct 2024
When the only functional department left
is the IRS,
then the only option we have left
is to stop paying.
72 · Mar 2021
Hotel Coral Essex
Justin S Wampler Mar 2021
Don't ******* stop,
the finish line nears.
72 · Aug 2021
Flood
Justin S Wampler Aug 2021
Vibrant orange puddles
sprout and wilt,
time washes over me.

A tide is pulling
the blankets down.

Love is scribbled
in the corner
of an old textbook.

A tide is pulling
the curtains down.

The moon peeks through
on a sunny afternoon,
and my eyes smile.

A tide is pulling
us further apart.
72 · Jun 2021
Driven
Justin S Wampler Jun 2021
Where do the lights go
when they leave your eyes?
Do they waft along through the rafters,
do they linger on long after
love has come and gone?
Do they illuminate darkened rooms
with a subtle radiance,
like seeing heat on the horizon
that sunny afternoon I spent
speeding down I80?
I saw a mirage mirroring your vestige
and my flesh rippled with goosebumps,
my thoughts had been on the lines
right as they began to blur.
72 · Nov 2020
Meta
Justin S Wampler Nov 2020
I hate writing.

But I love the idea,
And more importantly,
The image
Of being a writer.

What's cooler
Than a glass
Of brandy,
Beside an ashtray.

With a full pack
Of marlboro lights,
And a mechanical keyboard
Clacking away the night.

I want to be a writer
For all the wrong reasons.
I want to convince you,
Dear reader,
That I'm a phony.

Maybe you already knew.
Maybe it doesn't matter why
I want to be a writer.
Maybe all that matters
Is writing about it.
71 · Oct 2024
Vaguely nomadic
Justin S Wampler Oct 2024
He's clocking out, climbing into his car.
He can do both things at once,
the time clock is just an app on his phone.
These days, he guesses, most everything
is just an app on the phone.

Phone. We still call it that.
Wonder how many people
make calls these days at all?
He laughs quietly to himself
and starts the engine,
shifts into first,
slips the clutch,
and he's on the road.

He passes run down storefronts
long abandoned, old restaurants
with four or five different names
glued to the facade. Nothing lasts here.

The diner still runs though,
a well oiled machine.
Maybe I'll eat there tonight
he says to himself.
Breakfast for dinner, eggs and bacon.
Sounds good.

Maybe he'll stay there for six hours.
Drinking coffee,
talking to locals.
Maybe he won't.
Maybe he'll take the long way home
and hit the pub for wings.
Maybe he won't though.
No matter what he ends up doing
he's always satisfied having the options.

It's not the places I go to waste my time,
the thought comes to him suddenly,
it's the option of being able to waste it
wherever and whenever I want.
That's what I really love.

He smiles a slight grin,
eyes full of sunset.
His stomach grumbles,
hits a downshift as he steps on the gas,
and cruises off into the horizon.
It may not be a particularly exciting
or overly successful life, but
one thing that's for certain is that
he'll be happy to do it all over again
tomorrow.
71 · Jul 2021
Ask me how I know
Justin S Wampler Jul 2021
Spend enough time
feigning stupidity
and it'll end up
becoming true.
71 · Jan 2021
Compulsions
Justin S Wampler Jan 2021
A perfect fan of water
spraying from the spoiler
of that passing Porsche
in the evening rainstorm
gave me brief inspiration
to create something new.

I kind of hate this.

Creation is frustrating.
My life has been full
of combating little impulses
that compel me to break ****.
Whether it be pushing a hinge too far,
or twisting the cap on a bottle
until I shred the threads,
it's compelling to break ****.
Then I always feel awful about it
after it's done.

Do other people have those?
Those little impulses,
those little compulsions?
But instead of them
whispering to break things,
do they whisper creation?
70 · Nov 2021
Untitled
Justin S Wampler Nov 2021
I base my personality
off of other people.

Though I've been rather alone.

Who am I supposed to be now?
70 · Jun 2021
Wind chime
Justin S Wampler Jun 2021
The virtuous voice
of father time
is singing
bittersweet lullabies
that I don't
even recognize.

My ears ring,
and I squinch up my face
in revulsion.
70 · Apr 2021
Canine
Justin S Wampler Apr 2021
In my dream, I'm coming home.
Footsteps echoing in the foyer
as I climb the nineteen stairs.
Keys and tumblers.
The door swings shut behind me
with a soft little snik.
In the dream there's a dog
asleep on the floor of my apartment.
I'm frightened when I see it,
the blonde fur intimidates me.
In my dream its tail is curled,
wrapped around it's body.
It's facing away from me.
My emotions ramp from frightened
to fearful as I step towards it,
and when I reach out a shakey hand
to touch the blonde fur...
I sharply inhale and retract my arm,
the dog is ice cold.
It turns it's head and looks at me,
and where it's eyes used to be
are now only two tangled, knotting messes
of writhing maggots.
In my dream the dog speaks to me
just as the scream that's caught in my throat
has a chance to escape.
It mutters something gutteral as I begin to shriek.
I never hear the word it says, though.
I wake up sweating.
I wake up again.
70 · Mar 2021
Beer battered
Justin S Wampler Mar 2021
An abusive alcoholic? Who, Me?!

No ma'am,
I'd just like to order a dozen wings please.
69 · May 2021
Freedom
Justin S Wampler May 2021
There's not a thing in the world
more liberating than
not holding it in any more.

Just letting it go.

Taking a massive diarrhea
while standing in the shower.
69 · Nov 2024
Saych Ease.
Justin S Wampler Nov 2024
Was that bench comfortable
beside the manufactured creek?
We never even saw it
for what it was;
an oft-tended golf course.

For us it was freedom,
it was cooperative solitude.
It was an infinite bed of
manicured grass to jump on.

In regards to the rest of the world,
we were gone.
We were free.
Free. Flee.

You sat there looking out on the water,
right hand tucking that pesky
strand of hair behind
your delicate ear.

I remember my mouth watering
looking at your earlobe.
I remember the breeze
gracing me with you.

The swallows flew in inverse arches,
just grazing the glassy surface.
Shattering and sending ripples
everywhere.

You still sit there in this picture.
A flower frozen in resin,
kept pure of oxidation.

I'm still there too, just...
behind the camera.

Forever destined to only look at you.

Even now, all these years later.

Destined to look,
and to remember.
69 · Mar 2021
Untitled
Justin S Wampler Mar 2021
Dealing with these god ****** degenerates
gives me such a headache.
Every.
Single.
Time.
Pay your ******* bills,
it's not my job to *******
harangue you for money.
I'm just the delivery guy.
69 · Aug 2021
Manic pixie dream girl
Justin S Wampler Aug 2021
Blue
and green
and purple and pink.
Tight
and loose
and acutely obtuse.

Be mine,
do you have
the time
to complete
me?

Or are you busy
being
you?

More than a trope,
still I'm roped
in.

Deserving,
no,
demanding
of more
than just
being something
to adore.
Justin S Wampler Mar 2021
Oh great,
the bugs are awake.

I walked right through a cloud
of mosquitoes today.
Oh, great.
The bugs are awake.

Snow is still on the ground,
the sun's only been out for one day!
Oh great...
...the bugs are awake.
69 · Nov 2020
A way out
Justin S Wampler Nov 2020
A slight taste of copper,
A whisper of a doubt.
Neighbors are screaming,
A dog is barking,
It's 7:00 pm.

My left ear gets hot,
Maybe that means
Someone is talking about me.
I ponder who it could be,
I wonder who I want it to be,
As I imagine sticking my head
Out the window of a moving car.

Streetlights whipping past me,
Streaks of orange arc-sodium
Burning into my retinas.
Someone takes a picture,
Flashless,
And the memory is gone.

Back home, neighbor is
Pounding on the wall.
The fishtank is low,
It gurgles at me in contempt.
The dog is still barking,
It's 7:01.

My ear is still hot.
69 · Apr 2021
Roadkill 2
Justin S Wampler Apr 2021
Y'know it don't have to be a squirrel.
A rabbit or even a cat works fine too.
Let me tell you, if life grows mundane
all you gotta do is find something dead.
But if that doesn't quite do the trick
try being the one who kills it instead.
Life is littered with hidden speed bumps,
it can be good to find them, my friend.
Life begets life, or so it is said.
But a tiny taste of death will remind you
to beget while the getting's good.
68 · Oct 2020
Ex-Sting Guish
Justin S Wampler Oct 2020
Like a fire come
During drought season,
Ain't nothing coulda been done.
Red, White,
Blue lights
Pour like liquid
Into my irises.
Deaf to the sirens,
Congested to the smoke,
Numb to the pain.
Another one down the drain.
68 · Feb 2021
HelloPoetry
Justin S Wampler Feb 2021
Dude this website ******* ***** these days,
does anyone know of any alternatives?
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