I shake these words out of my head,
But they swarm back.
A million killer bees on a mission.
Filling my soul with dread.
Not enough
You can't hold on
It's all over
A full on assault.
The buzzing is enough to drive a person mad.
The hive has broken open.
They are angry.
Ready to serve a death blow to anybody near.
All I can do is curl up and say my final plea.
Stingers poised, they deliver.
Pure agony.
Last thoughts always profound I wonder...
Is this tortured death worth the sweet taste of honey?

Two voices become one
Our hearts finding the sun
Soul scrubbing at midnight
Constantly more insight
Missing you when you're not here
Wishing I was near
Lover?
Friend?
I'm in it until the very end

With loving hands you bound these ropes.
I didn't know that all this time you were tying a noose to hang me.

Severed
I send it to a place inside
Where other body parts reside
Locked away for eternity
Throw away the ******* key
Banish all the fuckery.
I can not give this the time of day
Or night, if you may
The door is closing
Seal it in
Unfortunately, to my chagrin
This won't be spoken of again
The love we have was not enough
Don't examine
It's too tough
You split my marshmallow
Open wide
Cut right through my elephant hyde
Too easy for you to run
So I tuck this away
Hide from the day
I can't go on another way
Trust?
Severed
I send it to a place inside
Where other body parts reside
Locked away for eternity
Throw away the ******* key
Banish all the fuckery.
Trust that simply wasn't meant to be.

I called my best friend today and had my heart ripped from my chest.
He said it's not you, it's me.
I text my best friend today and told him that the only thing keeping me from slitting my ******* throat is that my kids are home.
He said "Call your husband and go to the hospital. I don't know what to do, but I care about you."
I called my best friend today and he said "Hear my voice. You are needed here, I am one voice that needs you."
I called my best friend today and I am STILL HERE.

I was an empty vessel
You planted a seed
Watered my soul
Now my garden flourishes
Under your care
I bloom