You’re the first person to kiss me just to kiss me
The first to mean it when you say you love me
The first to make me believe there was good in the world
The first to show me how it felt to be truly loved
And now you’re the last
The last to have their lips on mine
The last to trace their hand across my body
The last to say I love you
The last person I want to have

I want to die
There is no secret meaning behind this one
It’s plain and simple
I do not wish to be alive

Not talking to you drives me insane
I don’t know what to do with myself
I have so many things I want to say to you
So many things to tell you
I go more insane everyday
You are the only one I want to talk to
The only one I have the energy to talk to
I want you to wait for me to get better
But I understand if you don’t
I wouldn’t wait for me either

I found your hat under my bed
I have slept on it every night
And worn it every day
I know you probably want it back
But I can’t bring myself to give it to you
It’s the only piece of you I have left
And I am not ready to give that up
So maybe one day in the future
If I see you in passing while I’m wearing it
I’ll be able to give it back to you
But until then
I’m gonna to cherish the last piece of you I have

I will pick and scratch at my hands
Until they’re red raw
Just so I don’t have to remember how it felt to touch you
Because when I look at them
They don’t feel like mine
All I can think about
Is how it felt to hold your hand
How it felt to hold you

Tell me you hate me
That you didn’t love me
That you never wanted me
That it was all a lie
That you don’t miss me
That you regret everything
Just tell me these things
To make it easy for me to leave

I have loved you for 532 days
And I will love you for 532 more