You’re a shadow in the back of my mind,
Sometimes the darkness consumes me,
For days or weeks on end,
And it feels like I can’t breath,
Your name is clawing its way up my throat,
Aching to be called out,
But I can only whisper it,
In the early hours of the morning,
Where no one can hear or see me

I still dream about you
All the things we did
And all we haven’t done
I dream of us lying in bed talking
Or cooking in the kitchen together
I dream of us travelling
And staying up all night because we don’t want to sleep
You are in nearly all of my dreams
And I wake up sadder each morning

You’ll find someone new
You’ll move on from me
You’ll find someone that will love you how you need
You’ll get on with your life
But me?
I won’t move on
Or find someone new
I’ll be stuck in the memories of us
I’ll always be waiting in case you want to come back
I’ll always hope you come back

I find us in everything
Be it a game I’m playing
Pets I see together
Leaves on the floor
I see us in everything
I see you in everything
I don’t think it will ever stop
And we’ll never cross paths again

We’re back to being strangers
After everything we went through
It doesn’t feel right
But there’s nothing I can do about it
I am trying to be okay with it
I don’t know if I ever will be

I still want to die
Maybe more than ever before
I do not feel safe in myself
I haven’t in a long time

You’re the first person to kiss me just to kiss me
The first to mean it when you say you love me
The first to make me believe there was good in the world
The first to show me how it felt to be truly loved
And now you’re the last
The last to have their lips on mine
The last to trace their hand across my body
The last to say I love you
The last person I want to have