I tried turning the other cheek
It left me battered and bruised

I tried washing their ***** feet
They walked over me after I was done being used

I tried opening up my home to them
I was left with the debts and dues

I tried my best to understand
But I'm still so confused

I've worked so hard to share my art
Years and I'm still afraid to starve

I wanted to show the world my heart
Crushed under the imperial boot

I finally found peace when I ran away
Back home where I once sought to escape

But this calm wasn't meant to last
As my fears of the world turned inward on my self

Plagued by anxiety and chronic stress
Paralyzed by the most simple of tasks

Where there once was a boy with flowering ambition
Now sits a man made of broken glass

I never thought I'd go back to smoking
But there's not much to do here
Besides stoke the fire.

I spent a year watching it all crumble
So I tucked my tail between my legs
And went home humble

I wonder around trying to stay busy
There's so much that needs done
But I'm so ******* lazy

I thought I had conquered my many addictions
The shadow of my past haunts me
Causing these afflictions

I've been in a panic, knowing I'm undeserving
Happiness and success aren't for me
The pressure is unnerving

I can't handle drugs like I used to
My palpitations make me anxious, but
What else can I do?

I gave it my best, and tasted the good life
My art has been seen by so many
But I was stifled

Now I'm just bored, so **** it I'm smoking
The feeling of nicotine is
better than nothing

I never wanted to be
As still as the stone
Though,  even the mountains
Slowly erode away

Time flows like rivers
Winding up and down
Rapids here,  trickles there
Always in motion

Hearts thump with purpose
Though, sometimes erratically so
The anxiety of the end
Coming ever closer

The spirits come and go
Passing through the veil
Heed their warnings though
You'll follow their trail.

It's the part of the story, that
You can't quite put into words
Despite the message being sent
Through written symbols and prose

It's the point where the science is
Dissolving into ether
The solution is clear as day
Burning bright in your center

It's the similies we see, when
Peering into the cosmos
Black holes spiral the galaxies
Like Iris casting rainbows

There's an art to the way you walk
In teaching children to talk
The purest act of creation
To learn love and expression

Time has an incredible knack, for
Marching us into the next chapter
Pages turn by light of your lantern
Guiding me back home

I built a life of fame and fortune
Paved my way to riches and stardom
When lightning struck, I watched it crumble
Left with only stone

Vanity and Lust wrought my twenties
Greed and Wrath spent all of my plenty
The cost of life's lessons is our Envy
Gluttony for truth

Transitioning into thirty three
Searing flames of holy prophecy
Right hand scribbles my biography
Pride has sold my youth

We pay our dues in isolation
Growth consuming the old foundation
The desert teaches moderation
The Sun's golden hues

When you hear thunder roar
It's hard to imagine
You could be the one in a million

But when the static in the air
Makes your hair stand on end
The realization comes fast as lightning