I waited, because of love.
I suffered, because of love.
I put my needs after yours, because of love.
I tried and tried and tried because of love.
but tonight I learned that love is not enough.

It's habitual, your love is like a ritual
often feeling unrequited
my love is so one sided
can't say I ever minded though cause at the end of the day once you've hit the hay and gone to sleep, I lay up reminded to really love myself deep because nobody can keep myself like me
and no one will love you true quite like you

What wanders above?
Could it be we are in many, many other universes?

I tend to get rowdy so tell your men to watch their mouth when they're around me

You remind me of a mistake I once made
You remind me of an ache I still crave
I'll try to tame my imagination, but I think you've dreamt about it too.

My motives might be selfish
these nightmares are more like dreams
as my day continues further I'm noticing a common theme
so even with my eyes shut the thought of you never leaves
the thought of you always pops up and when it does I am relieved.

Its been sixty days since I kicked my addiction
I'm thinking why I loved him, I'm thinking about why I didn't
I'm thinking about the seven years I spent by his side, and all the times I fantasized about being his wife
I'm thinking about my dad and if he'll ever recover
I'm thinking bout the relationship between him and my mother
I'm thinking about Neli, and if she'll ever stop
but thats another thought I should probably drop
Only two months in but I feel I'm getting the hang of it
I'm grateful for this life even if at times I truly hated it
but theres nothing to complain about I'm proud of myself
I redefined perseverance and worked through every condition
weathered through the storms of any degree
I've been through hell and back anyone who knows me agrees
I don't need to reminisce on all the hardships I faced
I know I made it through and I did it with grace
next milestone I make is technically ninety days but honestly I celebrate every single day
this is a blessing, and I don't wanna mess it up
you won't catch me popping bottles
you want catch me in the club
my new idea of fun is sitting down in that chair and listening to what my elders have to share
for me there is no going back, I give what I can
cause its a fact, what you give you attract
I don't have another relapse in my body cause if I do I'll be dead
so like I said I'm gonna give it everything that I can
this life's a blessing
and you can't shake away my faith, you can try but I am impermeable to the hate
they say it only gets better, so I'm patient and I wait
I don't make split decisions
I run it by my sponsor cause I still have blurry vision
and she treats me like a daughter
crawled my way through hell and came out a whole lot stronger