We sat huddled in the hallway,
we were muddled in the mud,
we were cuddled in the corridor,
we were flooded by the flood.

We were crying in the courtyard,
we were staring at the sky,
we were praying you were peaceful,
we were feeling you would fly.

We hoped you went to heaven,
we were children of the Lord,
we were losing faith so quickly,
our faith never was restored.

You can't believe in Jesus,
when he takes your friend away,
but you must believe that heaven
is where you friend will stay.

Or can you have it both ways?
Think she's moved up to the sky,
but the devine power that led her there,
also made her die?

My faith was never very strong,
this secured my disbelief,
there's no god watching over us
who filled our lives with greif.

If I could see what you see when you look into my eyes,
I think I'd see a person that I really would despise.

I'm not much of a talker, but I often talk too much,
I always think the worst of you, and judge you at first touch.

I always try to smile more but I'm often looking sad,
disgruntled, just plain angry, or lost in thought and mad.

I try to think of others, be sensitive and kind,
but then you learn that loving people get pushed and shoved aside.

I'm not much of a looker, as I was often told,
my face is very wonky and my nose is far to bold.

As much as we try and fight it, good looking people reign ,
but beauty is subjective, no eyes are the same.

I'd like to be a leader, but I'd rather follow on,
I'd like to be more confident but it all just seems so wrong.

I try to be myself because we're taught that's what you'll love,
but I don't think my brain knows me nearly well enough
I think what I'm saying is that who I want to be,
is someone different, someone else, anyone but me!

We were enemies in childhood,
I didn't comprehend,
a little sister wasn't cool
who followed you no end.

You were my shining beacon,
my shiny golden light,
until the day I grew up,
and you ceased to shine so bright.

You thought I was a ******,
I considered you a bore,
we barely spoke for decades
shut behind our door.

But now you are so lonely,
and I can learn to bend,
you cannot choose your family,
but I consider you, my friend.

Everyone has their own path, a light to guide them through the dark,
We've all gone our separate ways, our futures falter, our past stays.
Although a lot of things have changed, I knew they'd change they had to change, and our whole life was rearranged, 5 long years I would exchange.

Our little group was torn apart, some with ripped and broken heart,
some moved on to better things, some just let their life begin,
Although a lot of things must end, they had to end, I knew they'd end, and our whole life will break and bend, but 5 long years I wish would mend.

Now our number's down to three, some at university,
a few got jobs or moved away, some are here but refuse to stay.
Now the most important one, who left and left the world undone, you were so young, we were so young, 15 years is far too young.

We all have to die one day, but you were snatched and led away,
your brain and heart they disagreed about how the flow of blood should be,
You left and left us in the dark, the never, never fading mark, no goodbyes, no second tries, done, gone, lost, dark.

Do you remember the summer we played,
we stood up with  guitars on stage?
At the time it was a mess,
but I look back and must confess.

We started playing, I start to sing,
my voice came out a hoarse croaking,
she threw the drumstick through a door,
we were laughing on the floor.

Hot and stuffy we sat in the dark,
waiting for our smallest part.
The guitars went badly out of tune,
a wolf howling up at the moon.

I regret not trying to play once more,
before your soul went up to war,
the time we spent in the music hut,
freed me from my deadly rut,

Do you remember the day you died?
we heard about it, we cried we cried,
a darkness fell forever more,
never lifted, filled with regret, angry at god, us, us, the darkness tore.