I promise you will not regret me

I get annoyed by the Cocomelon song
Calling a boo-boo an owie
And then
I get annoyed with myself
For being
THAAAT person
******* about a Cocomelon song
Still
Here I am
Allowing myself
The luxury of whining about
Meaningless ****
We might as all well
Take a moment
To whine about meaningless ****
What a freaking luxury!
Right now
Take the moment
Then
Get over it
Cocomelon who?

Anger
Built up
Toxic
Spreading unchecked
Fire inside
Each team
The rich are poor losers
Or so it would seem

If I disappeared
Who would it matter to?
Surely not you  
Brought it hard as I could
I thought I did real good
It’s an acceptable failure
For me
At least
The way I see

Once upon a time
There was a queen
Of a land nobody’s ever seen
She sent out the brochures
Invited one, in particular
And one only
Whether he showed up
Still remains to be seen

Fake friends are worse than enemies
They love you so much in the
Fairweather breeze
Frigid winds always come
Eventually
And that's when
You figure out
Who's the fake friend

Have you ever watched a hippo take a ****?
If hippos weren’t *******
They’d simply ****
And let it fall
But that is not the hippo way
Hippos rapidly shake their little
Stumpy tails
Spattering **** everywhere
And hippos are tightly packed in
**** spraying all over faces
And this is the way it is
In hippo world
And people seem surprised to find
Hippos are among the most violent
Kind

It could happen one day
Maybe even tomorrow
That Hellopoetry goes
FREAKING VIRAL
And suddenly
We become cool
For a few minutes
All the secrets we told
In virtual anonymity
Since nobody in our family
Bothers with poetry
BOOM!  
Mainstream
Attached to our names
I don’t know if it’d be a dream come true
Or curse
For most of us

Plenty of things to write about
There’s a crisis almost everywhere
Lots of things that are unfair
Which stars make a pretty pair
Colors, numbers, nature, too
Man made stuff
To name a few
Oceans, forests, vegetables
Planets, stars and moons
Movies, tv shows
Bugs Bunny cartoons
(**** THE WABBIT!!)  
Current events, the weather
****, I can write about whatever
So that’s what I am gonna do
Because
I can no longer write love about you
✌🏼

We have gotten quite accustomed to being
Strangers
I only think of you once in a while
I prefer it
Than to forget you, entirely
The good things about you
I try to take with me

I came at you
Naked and barefaced
And though you pretended not to see
I need to believe
You thought I was lovely
Maybe I’m done
Probably not
I’m doing it currently
It might always be
I share with you parts of me
Naked and barefaced
As I can be
You do not want to see
A bigger ****** for you
Than it is for me
You missing out on all that happy
Preemptively disgraced
Because you don’t want anyone else to see
You naked and barefaced

I just sent my grandkids
A video montage
Of heroic dogs saving the life of their
Owners
And told them if they want a dog
They should show it to their mum
If those kids ever need an alibi
I’d surely give them one
The next video I sent to them
Was of a prank
Feeding seagulls at the beach
French fries mixed with laxatives
On a busy, sunny day
If it ever comes about
The seagull huge **** spout
Don’t ask me who did it
I’ll never say

My children are my legacy
But they are grown
And don’t need me
So now I write my poetry

Your soul is beautiful
Just captivating
You’re so in touch with yourself
For good or bad
You accept it
And make no excuses
In fact, you’re too ******* yourself
You bear the weight
Make up for what is short
Lots of hard work
You enjoy dirt
But start and end every day clean
You are macho as a man can possibly be
In nature and tendencies
But willing to explore
Femininity
Feelings are not something you shove aside
And though you do have lots of pride
You are, at your base, a humble man
Following a working man’s plan
Never relaxed
Even when you’re relaxing
You refill your energy through music
And the results of a hard days work
Every time you pray
It is someone else you ask to save
A man not of this time
Vintage soul
Honorable goal
Beautiful, beautiful man
I might just trip and fall
Into the plan

It was sweet
To proclaim
To love me more than the moon and
Stars
But how much does one really love
The moon and stars?
At least you didn't lie

Progress is near impossible
Stuck in the
Poor me
Big bogs
Buggy bug big bogs
Over-filled with frogs
Croaking painfully
With sore throats
Pooaaaoooaaaeeeeaaaaaooooor meeeeeeee!

Yep
I just got soundly beat
To a pulp
On Words With Friends
By
“Scottie McBuggarface”.

It's just how it goes down
Sometimes
Two people with all the ingredients
For a perfect romance
But the meats and the vegetables
Just will not dance
And we wind up with
Gross on our plate
Being with you
Is like mixing parmesan cheese
With Boston baked beans
At first it's like
"Hmmm, it might be good."
Til the beans and the cheese
Meet in your mouth
And you no longer play with
Your food

He is my muse
Rarely on time
Though always with the right line
He will never be mine
But these poems live forever
As part of me
Which is probably more
Than most lovers
Have in store
And ever will be

It was something that was meant to be
You being you, and I being me
Supposed to be temporary
But lingering
Relentlessly

The gift of absence
Against my will
Probably healthy
But torture, still

It’s not like me to connect with some man
Over the internet
I wish I could
Fall into it from afar
Get the tingles and jingles
Long term
No matter where they are
But I’m not a long term tingler
Without real time
Association
I fall into heavy like
So often
But heavy like soon fades
Into “I sort of remember that guy”
Maybe the problem is me
And my unwillingness to really try
But my flakiness has been put to good use
I’m the poet with
Infinite muse

I don’t feel comfortable being a victim
I suppose I am
A victim
Probably more than most
I don’t like to stay a victim
Though being one seems unavoidable
****** up ****
Has routinely happened to me
Since I was a baby
Amazing **** too
I probably deserved it
Most of it
I was a knucklehead
And I’m still an *******
Sometimes
Which simply means I’m an *******
There is no such thing as being a little
*******
When it comes to assholery
It’s either all out or all in
Or maybe just wipe clean
And itch less
Being a victim
Feels itchy to me

You punched above your league
You knew it
She didn’t
She believed in your superiority
Only because she had a hard time
Seeing
Herself
For her true worth
She only saw
What she was made to believe
By a society
That cannot recognize
Leagues

What does one do, and how does it go
When they fall in love with a man
….
Named Waldo?
Is it appropriate to say
“Mister, the name is a no no?
Can I call you James, instead
Or maybe Paul or Joe
Or Ted?  
Maybe I can even agree
To call you by the name Wally
Waldo was an ok name
Until they came up with a find that boy game

I came here looking for you
You’re not here
Amused myself with something newer
On my way to something new
My attention span is nonexistent
But I stay around the edges
You’ll be back here soon

Addictions are accidental
Nobody sets off
To be an addict
We all know it ends badly
And yet
So many of us start
Foolishly
Maybe addictions
Can’t possibly be
Accidental
You’ve gotta work at getting addicted
And pay at it, too
I’ve never seen an addict
Who didn’t know what they were
Getting into

How long do you fight for
What seems impossible?
Do you hope the desire
Dries up
And goes away?
Do you find something else
To lead you astray?
Does a dream unrealized
Call your psyche home?
Does it settle in your bones?
Ever there to taunt and tease
Staying so far out of reach
Does it approach
And then it leaves?
That probably is the way of dreams

The first victim of racism
We all know by name
Some worship him
And what he became
Jesus hung from that cross
In the middle of town
Simply because
He was the only white guy around

I go to you in my quiet time
When I settle my mind
I go to you frantically
I have been known to plead
I go to you to feel refreshed
I go to you to bleed
I go to you
To bring myself
Do you even want to see?

Maybe it was me noticing you
That made you lose yourself
But I give myself too much credit
And self-eye roll
Blush included
You’re not lost
You’re having a bad day
And I’m making it all about me
Who cares why
You’re losing yourself
Today
Tomorrow
You could find anew
It’s just one day
But I sorely miss
The really you

Poetic justice
Time dismissed
Sometimes it happens
A century after
One’s written it
Is that still justice?

One day
Maybe
It will be forgotten
I hope
You take for granted
You never figure
One day it won't

He strips me bare
With his words
And I look full-on
Beautiful
An image of me
I never could see
Until it was so
Master fully  
Presented to me

You are so smart
But so dramatic
You could really be a thoughful person
If you thought about other people
I see it in you
The desire to care
But you just can't seem to find it
In there

You don’t owe me a thing
Which is what you offer
Awareness unacknowledged
(or however you spell that maddening ******* mind game helpless dull ache)
Best and utmost effort
I put forth
I couldn’t have tried any harder
I tried like a boss
And that is my win
Within
This loss

He didn't break you
You were already broken
He just played with you
Indelicately
It will be him
To whom the blame switches
For all your failures and faults
In order to avoid blaming yourself
Your mind does somersaults

Old Father Time checked, so there'd be no doubt
Called on the north wind to come on out
Then cupped his hands so proudly to shout
La-di-da, di-da-di-dum, 'tis Autumn
The trees say they're tired, they've born too much fruit
Charmed all the wayside, there's no dispute
Now shedding leaves, they don't give a hoot
La-di-da, di-da-di-dum, 'tis Autumn
Then the birds got together
To chirp about the weather, mmm
After makin' their decision
In birdie-like precision
Turned about and made a bee-line to the south
My holding you close really is no crime
Ask the birds, the trees, and Old Father Time
It's just to help the mercury climb
La-di-da, di-da-di-dum, 'tis Autumn
It's just to help the mercury climb
La-di-da, di-la-di-dum, 'tis Autumn

Anger
Amazing what it can do
In just a snap
It can have power over you
Hero or villain it brings about
Get angry sometimes
You will without doubt
The smartest thing for you to do
Is control the anger
Don’t let it control you

Dancing expressively
Breaks from rules
Occasionally
Blending what could be
With reality
Penning odes of praise
For what should be
As written by me
Myself right there
For all to see
Maybe someday soon
These poems
Will make me think
Of someone other than you
Or it could be
These poems remind you
Of someone other than me

He is deep waters
Hidden under
A choppy surface
Many step straight from the shore
Assuming the floor
Inches away
And drop in over their heads
Unexpectedly
And one will wonder
How being under
Water
Can feel so fiery

I’m older than the internet
Older than cell phones
Air bags,
I got a few years on Mrs. Pac Man, too
I’m older than My Little Pony
And He Man; he’s just a youth
Easy Bake Oven, younger than me
So are VCRs and DVD
No ATMs present
Till I was a teen
And microwaves
Didn’t exist either
I’m thinking about
All the things we went without
But why did it seem so much easier?

There is no requirement
Of a tortured soul
In poetry
Just because it works for you
It doesn't work for me
And my poetry's not any less
Because I am happy

I don't remember what I saw in you
By now
You are a blip
But a high one
Short and sweet
Then miserable
Then gone
For good
And it is better
Because the highest high
With you
Is not the highest I can go
At any time
With anyone
On a good day
You will probably feel
The same,
Or at least, that's what you'll say

I could get all dramatic
And claim my heart is ablaze
Burning and twisting apart in all ways
I could talk about pretend pillow tears
Force you into the role I want you to play
Pledge undying loyalty for years and years
Guilt you into feeling some kinda way
But it ain’t my nature
To complain
In fact, though
My heart IS ablaze
Embers flying every which way
Smoke sometimes choke
And coughs up some soot
But mostly things feel pretty good
Whether you wouldn’t or whether you would

I presume you find begging unattractive
(Who wouldn’t?)
So I’m trying to do it with style and grace
Prancing  around in a tutu
Pretending that I don’t have egg on my face

I want you to have so many laughs
Sunny days
Health always
Intelligence to know when to pass and fade
So I can’t be butthurt
When you pass on me
You got your reasons
Seen lots of seasons
And know what’s worth folding on
Better hands, and the odds are long
I ain’t giving up
Yet
Holding on by the seat of my pants
Still working on acceptance
Halfway there, maybe
But can’t let it go
Baby
Wherever it’s gonna take me

He got me dreaming
Feening
For a taste
His little bit of nothing
He breaks off to me
Feels like a **** buffet
I’m caught up in his wave
On it all the way
To the break

Break my heart
Play me
Tear me apart
Twist me into spiral art
Better than the numbness
No passion
Icy cold against my will
Bring the flames
Relight the thrill

I suppose it’s a ****** for me
That you’re still
The most beautiful human being
I’ve ever seen
And maybe it’s a blessing
The ugly parts
Frailty really
And yet you’re still so beautiful to me
As imperfect as you be