high-noon sun waits for
ground to catch her beaming child
dresses the hat and feather
canonizes the dead worms
imprisoned in their hardened skins
these

shards of you
sit on my front porch
wide
wide
and I open my arms
to their concrete daughter
now full-grown
and working the night shift
like every bird that flies

into my glass dream

I walk through campus wearing
black leggings and those faded, leather
boots. I’m even wearing an
infinity scarf I bought full price at
Anthropologie and a pair of tiger-striped
cat eye sunglasses. ****, I look good.

On top of it, I’m smoking a Parliament
menthol, my red-lined lips whipping
smoke into the dead air, creating
a grey cloud that some would call cancerous and
others, ****.

But no one notices me, and, candidly, I
am okay with that because I notice me, and
I am a big red dance button that demands to
be pushed. So, I push myself and
groove down the brown brick road all the way
to classroom 114 in the science building.

the only flowers I
recognize are
tulips
denver-bred
blooming
fire
red
yellow
orange
photochemistry
defined by
valentine
bouquet
quite
atypical
yet
beautiful

wax-coating
iridescent
rain
mirror
ferti­lized
stamen
kiss me
bad
you
are the
only
species
that can
survive in my
backyard

I think I
love
you

you dream
one-thousand pounds
heavier than me—
a weaved, night sky
complete with brass buttons
and the bobby pin you forgot to take out
this

tessellation of Sunday letter
haunts me with your

lace and peach
as my fingers conduct

the bundle of flowers
to smoke

meaning
I can hear you
anchor that holds us
down
a second
I lost you
complete
fire
pierced
meaning
I am light
a flotation of end
a memory of when I was
four
a rise and you
the nebula in which
I
speck
meaning
a fullness
an overflow
a mist of brown and
wave
the hand which I
have writ
the looseness of your
outline
meaning
all the sheets
smooth and cupped
the ribbons around
the slight chip
rainbow
meaning
the sketch
and you
a prayer
I
break

sculpt me,
young artist
I am your brother
and you are gold
an effigy of
the purest
beauty
Giganti
Jeune Fille a la Gerbe
even your art
I take from you
out of
admiration
I find you
your svelte figure
bending into
the air
your hands
like magic
pricking my fingers
whatever you do
is mine
whichever way
your body turns
is my path
to confusion
ah
Camille
you are splendid
in your task
your caprice
molds the clay
your being
melts my
heart
let me sign
your body
for my
own

the morning sky
performs a hot dance of rain.
ever-growing lime washes away,
white and sour mistaken
by some noses as
aromatics.
a season
of ever-ending frost
absent from windows
and misty
misty
journey
through the rain
without an umbrella.

rain jilts
its luscious sun-lover
behind clouds.
it beheads drops into
the thin morning air
only to be crushed
by the sidewalk.

this excites the worms
who unearth themselves
like fishing-bait zombies.
the worms are then eaten
by the birds who brave
the rain and the slick
sidewalk, once baptized,
now eats their ****.

I step in a puddle
with my rain boots.
there are holes in their
heels, and I feel
my skin start to crinkle.
I think of you
for the first time in sky water
unsubmerged
docked
landed
and lean in
to the liquid veil.

oh, I’ve waited so long
oh, this rain is cool upon
my brow
oh, the fighting
the strife
is steam rising
to the clouds and the pain
is finally over
this life has ceased
and we will begin anew
resting always
rest for the weak
the uninhabited
the tears and grief
because god knows
I love you
to the moon and
back
and god knows
I’ll find you next time
somewhere in the sea
or a dot upon the horizon
coming for me
coming for the first time
in this life

I wanted you
to be an expression
this mirror
of what I see
the need to run awry
barefooted
meandering through
fountains
shooting
shooting
shooting
how I feel
into the sky-confused
particles
I supposed it is your best
to lay me down
in this bed of
I
I
I
don’t want you
to leave
the edge of this
bare
unscathed
still
shining
in the high
blue
trapped and
entangled
suffused
duplexed and
flexing
oh lord
leaving
leaving
leaving
in the eve of this
summertime

rain
little girl
rain with
hair
rain until
the sun chokes
rain with
your dis-attuned nails
rain
running Pisces through
my head
rain
another word called
rain for
some mallards
rain on
boy
rain
rabid 90’s hip hop
we listen while driving
to the theatre
rain pounding
in the car
in the eyes
rain
the sky seems to
penetrate
my car’s roof
and this poem
breaks through
water uprising
your grey hat
your almonds
and my chin
rain
I wish I could make it
for you
nightingale
I wish I could hear your
breath
in the morning

when you’re depressed you can get people
to mix you Arnold Palmers
or even
John Dalys
if you ask nicely
then you can get drunk
without anyone giving you ****
because all good depressed people
drown their grief with *****
and all good depressed people
die silently in doleful cloud
without drawing attention from
burping too loudly
or collapsing on a street corner
no
pain should be silent
with a tall glass of sweetened tea
a couple shots of *****
and a pencil writing furiously
the last thoughts
the last rights
the stencil of the moon
because all that will be left will be
a memory of you
standing naked in the mall screaming
I love you John Daly!!! Take me with you!!!
unfortunately
John Daly isn’t god
and he can’t zap
you from this earth
no matter how much you scream
you will always be a ghost on fire
drunk and afraid
wailing through the atmosphere
like a cat being held by its tail
you
the definition of good depressed people

Little lashes
Bopping on heads
Off goes one
In drool and
Headphones
The big green monster
The mousey placemat
The heavy breathing of congestion
The one lullaby
The one mother
Your little boy world
I love him through  
You

wings on barbed wire
wave me hello as the train
travels supernova
explosion through
downtown.

we have spoken words
that meant something,
that gripped iron ends
onto our ankles and kept
us close.

in shackles, we outshone
the entire galaxy.
in chains, we sped through
the world catching wind
of bleeding bird feet—the
sweet chips and chirps now
reverberate symphony
through thick plastic.

And I am on top
of you licking your pores
like charcoal.

cedar and gold
the kiss of flakes
little glaciers
melt in canoed-orbs
these footsteps tracking along
the era of winter
some birds
still sing
and I shake
in trepidation
I
little leaf
molding
peat and whiskey
keeps me warm
your cedar and gold
along a fire crackles
and I move in
the sweater
tight
the jean jacket
50’s boy
and laughter at
the weather
closer and
closer
still

the birds sifting through
the clouds
there is no chance
of rain
only sun
and the rarefaction of
wings against
molecules
ah
the simple things
when the morning is quiet
and I see
an imagined crane
perched on a branch
in the lake
we used to walk
around
the benches we used to
sit on
the black mist
that sometimes sits
around our
feet like a dog
we are not maquettes
but sculpted
made of marble
the stone birds sailing
overhead
the toy boats
the water
the lack of tears
and the machinery it takes
for me to say
*fly, fear. fly.
bring home my birdie.

I’m the perm of a
Poet
I can choke
I can breathe
I can drink a cup of coffee
And you
Are a murmuration
A flock of afternoon
midnight
I will let your
Black mass love me
However
However
However
It can
I’m reaching for you
Little bird
Take me with your arrow
The streets of this
Pure piano
And I introduce the yowling
Trumpet
The dead skin on
my back
Flecks with the quiver
Of flying with you
By choice

Xmas
I forget to breathe
and choke
while looking at my hands
and I realize I am
quite vain
a popstar
basking in hazardry
the snow you are meant
to see
You don’t know me
until
You go inside
and we kiss hands coming
out of the dark
you don’t know me until
the moment I ask you
to believe
there will be an Xmas when
the ice cracks blue
and I am not thinking
my imagination of us
old and riding a public bus
sliding down the glass
defying gorilla tape
I can’t even stop
half of myself
and know
Pain
Pain
Pain
Yes to
Love
Love
Love

*
* *
     *
* *
(snow falls)

my brain is a magnet
attracting itself to you
and my heart is a wrench
fixing the toilet
these incantations to raise
you up
these words to make you holy
have me on my knees
with the ****-mucked tiles
but I wouldn’t change
any of it
no
I’d do anything for you
my soul will split
at the rack before
I ever mutter a word
love
how dare I!
I thought I was better
I thought I could look
without touching
speak without breathing
feel without loving
disaster
fortuitous
storm of color
spray me red
splay me naked
for the world to see
my fingers are inspired
to write a friend
in history
in my heart
forever

I wish I could find
Another
Word
One plucked from a
Chicken or
Snagged to a line
But all I have is
Drift
You
Laughing
Like a drunken
Gondolier
This momentous
Rise of horns
And the little
Spittles of foam
That froth at
Our legs
The sea
Creates you
A scarf
And you turn
To look at me
Your eyes
Drifting
Through the notes
Around me
Sweet
Music
Who are you
If not mine
To keep

once there was an astrologer
who said
I predict universal pangs but
no big bangs
but you can be
my keeper
this afternoon
written in the stars
a kick here
a punch there
a hug on the bridge
are you being ****
or are you having
a stroke?
guts like a hawk
pure chutzpah and
peanut butter
cookies
a karma pig or
comma
depending which way
you look
me
half dog
you
half god
dess
Nostradamus
pinching our lungs together
a ******* frisee
a passion flower
euphoria
a wave of space
surrounding
the sun
a big middle
finger
a glisten and the
midday present
as you
squint
and I try to catch a little
piece

Core—molten caramel center but
dead. dead. dead.
Hot.
Bleeding.
Then cool, small and massed. A
little red

button in the sky more than 400 times
the diameter of—I snap
my fingers.

Magician

star
gives birth to carbon, oxygen, and contract
gravitationally toward
the black clasped to
nowhere—an end melting
rock, evaporating ocean, stabilizing
expansion caught in
helium

flash—the metals of yesteryear
believed to exist inside
of you.

I feel your beads
pressed against my
neck
106 prayers lifted
106 left
in the ***** laundry
a coconut scent
a play on words and
your face buried
into mine
even at midnight
the union tracks
flick
and I stand
bedazzled by
the lightning
shade
you offer
a moth to flame
a boat to ocean
a joyous pain
cut up
cut up
cut up
but I wouldn’t leave
my blood
behind
for
anything

You look
light into my
dreams
a whole mind
under this
ocean-tango
the
exit sign
the scents
entwined
ascending
your head
my neck
the pulse of you
sticks
burns
of fire
us
a
twizzler
of spirit
entering
with
transparency

how could I have known
when I received that
final kiss
I would end up here
in the country side
the soul of
you
my sister

every morning I walk
through the wheat
hands grazing over
the bearded kernels
my heart, light
my body, transcended
the leaves inside
turning

oh! the joy it brings
to tell you
dear sister
that what lies beyond
isn’t made of
marble
but pure light
dancing
in its finest
colors

if only you were here
with me
I could save you
from the moment
I fell
I could teach you to
sculpt autumn
dear sister
I could teach you
to sculpt love as it is
without
clay

the artistry in you
snapping bubbles
through your hair
resting feather
the coop
the hibernation
every bit of your work
a statement of
beast and sacrifice
sweet mother
holy sister
undying scientist
like windows
like soil
in which life grows
good earth
good prairie
miles and miles of you
swaying in the wind
inculcated within me
this immortal passion
to watch you sprout life
to watch you work
to watch you love
a blissful void
a simple kiss
a wonderful purple
this incomprehensible galaxy
makes sense
when I see your eyes
scanning billions of blades
of grass
when I witness the tortuous
beauty
of your smile
when I hear you
read your poetry
it’s the gift of nature
unprecedented
unexpected
un-censored
unlike anything I’ve ever
experienced
your love
Jessica
your love
is ineffable

You are bold
the inspiring queen
of Fs and
As
and I
a crafty lizard
this christmas mug
from which you drink
these scissors with
which I shred
words
our stories all
come together
on top
of a golden rose
24 carat
sampled with
my teeth
secured
in my bedroom
all of it
is yours
and
the last coin
evens
my luck

the waiting of
knick knack paddy whack
the toxic
neurotransmitters
the corrosion
of my 7th branch
the thought of
the reality of
sometimes lonely
on a little
planet
every *****
thing
evaporated
water
you draw me
your hand
covered in
lyrics
a limerick of knuckles
a sometimes waiting
patiently
a sometimes never
to come

a boy looks at me
on the train
and I exit
a blister of electric through
the tracks
my shoes
lightning struck
by blueberry muffins
I run
the cold
40 degree cloud
then a thought of you
I smile
a frozen broke in
hollies

wheat in color
a tan adobe
almost red
a genderless
bone
hollow and
ossified
I donate this
day to you
I enmesh
my soul
into the air
the harvest
all the while
standing
still

I feel the fire
the tips of
honeylocust
the change
to winter
perched
on the hurt
we’ve been through
singing like
every
love bird
should

My weapon is our memory
Is a  language of the undead
Alive
To the tuning base
And the clock ticks to
Midnight as
We kiss

the sun prowls around
its rocky master

and you
a shadow in its breath

your eyes closed
your hair blowing
like a brushfire
bleeding oolong

the brazen claps of
sunlight thunder
down upon your shoulders

a freckle appears

then another

then another

your sea of blank skin
now crushed
tiny islands
cooling you in
sun-drenched picture

night is precious
prey and
predator.

night is
whisper and
auscultation
of worried men.

night is blonde
bone removed from
the body.

night is stiletto
killer elite.

night is
my brightest
friend.

night,

leave
and take your
bell with
you.

I know the flowers better everyday
their twisting stems
their curtain petals
their floating spice

I know the flowers better everyday
their capillary roots
their plum faces
their purple stamens

I know the flowers better everyday
their shaking seeds
their modest thorns
their unabashed lust for the sun

I know the flowers better everyday
I know the sun will rise
I know the clouds will rain
I know my daughter will laugh

I know the flowers better everyday
I’ll draw a fence for flowers
I’ll draw a muzzle for the sheep
I’ll draw a number for the man to crunch

I know the flowers better everyday
I know how lovely it is to feel
grass in between toes
the breath of a boa
the embrace of home

I know the flowers better everyday
I am forty
I am a mother
I love fearlessly

picture:

we stand in your office
and the *** crack of a homeless man
glints through the window--
a rise in sweat and speeds
so great they leave a
trail of milk to nurse
my wounds.

the eyes of a frilly moon and
your arms wrapped around
my Orion—

******* reach
for each other in the black.*

painted.

blue feet and sophistication.

my hand touches
yours

wild in wind

flesh and
insect

a plume of rapid
so pink and

gorgeous to the
biochemist

within my timbre

I sing your
praises to the moon

eighth note
yellow-tipped

flat-cupped
cord and

piano blooming

bordered void snaps
shadowed woman,
shadowed man—
a multiplication of flowers
hang loose as

our lips transpose the rose,
eat the rock. one

quasar fraying my teeth—soft
as I etch your back, perfect
and slender.

settle in the rose—
a hideaway.
my shoulders turn
the air.
my scapula-
smooth moments—
dead.
living.
intrazombie.
it’s my smoke which
wicks your
love—the foolish
gray, unfree and
blind. I believe
I am half—troubles
far. fingers
burning ginger
freckles through
the white page.
somehow
the rock and flint
set you afire.

my
intestines tighten
the patient begging
parts
the tears
how I do
grow wet
leavening

stars and radio master
intercloud motion—1000 light
years in most directions. However,
I am still blind to anything
but you. This

dark matter aloha steps
off my mind’s plane
into the muggy air. A string
of flowers is placed around
my neck, and I look up—
starbursts
spit their rings violent and
central—your body
in music. Now, tropical
space—population

one. A tear rolls down
my face onto the
runway—I can’t remember
the sound of

your voice.

Earlier I saw you untie the Fox
It was in the high branches
But you were fearless/
A reflection in the sky’s acred field
As you set the captive free
To fill his mouth with soil
Now

You put your sister in his place
Her hands bound to the trunk as
Cars yank the highway closer
To the park of ratway silence
You

Pick up the pen for her
Write how it is easiest
To crawl when you are
Tied and drooling
When you take the place of
A martyr and expect nothing
Except something
Blue and brindle-striped and barking
Perfect

Day: you and I take a little white dog
Tie her to the tree and call her our own
Tell her to come and sit and eat
With us around the tree while
We tie each other’s teeth to the roots
With fraying wire
Why

Are we so tired? We ask.
Two too many separations.
Two too many rescue missions
And forgetting how to keep things close
Don’t

Tie the cross-stitched sister to your liking—
Maybe a bow tie or braid but
Imagination only binds itself when
It is allowed to be bound
Phil

Osophy: yet you still danced
To what is
What is
What is
What should be leaves falling now
Is the sky
What should be leaves falling
What should be
What should