It's raining computers over here!
I basically got motherboards popping out my ***

It hertz

My life is still such a mess and no one would even care if I just died but there's still a part of me that can't help but to genuinely believe that Taylor Swift is in love with me and that we will get married and have babies someday.

Of course I'm a little bit crazy...I'm an American; if you live in America and consider yourself not crazy, you're totally insane!
I love this country!

I just took half a puff of **** and it's got me thinking and/or feeling like I might have real thoughts and emotions which pertain to other people but it can't be real cuz drugz are bad!!!!
Ain't that what they always taught us?
Ain't that what we always learned and/or believed?
Psh...it's all a bunch of smoke hand mere hers @ sea end hove sea day, ma knee gears

Don't call me smart unless you plan on ******* my brains out, bab

I am so tired
I should just take one of my giant pills that my doctor prescribed
They just tranqulize me, which is good...because I seriously hate being awake so much sometimes
I can't even figure out how to spell the word tranqulize right now and refuse to look it up because I seriously do not even care at all
I just wish life was always a bit happier and that good people didn't die young and leave you all alone for the rest of your life
I like to daydream and fantasize that Taylor Swift would love me but she probably would not even care much about me or my life
I'm so stupid
Just wanna sleep or something, even though it isn't even dark out
Summer is my favorite season and I've been waiting forever for it but I don't even care right now
I'm always alone
My heart is black
I will always be alone in a cold cave of sad desperation and total insanity and no one will ever reach out to me and really care and I won't care, either
No one can love me because I'm a beast and beauty isn't real

My older brother surprised the crap out of me by getting my car running today
I was ready to just slit my wrist and hang myself because of all the drama that's been going on in my life and head
Just got back from cruising all around town

You got a ticket to kiss my **** ***, hard, *****

Have other people ever heard of movies?
They're cool
It's these stories people do on film...like a play

I haven't even been around the block yet
She haz
That's the differ ants between me and Dare All Hanna
Hanna means grace...basically
My name is seriously budd fox
**** know...I am not reel late tad to Char Lee She nnnnnnn hahahaha

I wish I would just have a heart-attack right now or something
I bet this is how Aaron Shwartz felt
All they can do is hurt us and put us in trouble and keep us there
The bad thing
The shadow we can't escape

Sometimes people who act like they love me actually hate me but that's fine because I sometimes act like I hate myself, even though I actually love myself, a lot. Love myself more than you...that's for **** sure. I'd punch you square in the jaw if I ever saw you in public because I need to prove to my dad that I am finally strong enough to stand up for myself and attack innocent strangers in public with my fists cuz I don't want all the hot babes out there in the world to see me stand down from a fight.
I wish this was a picture website like Instagram or something so I could post some selfies; I want everyone here to see how hot I am in real life.

What the ****!

Just forgive me for real
Don't just say the words!
Let's make life great instead of horrible

It sure is a pretty computerrick day out today!

I love me sum gamez oh fur there on facebook...I don't even chat with my only friend on there that often cuz what's there to even say to anyone these days? Nothing ever pans out or whatever. Maybe I'm just being too cynical...which I blame on Gordon Geko if I am...because it was seriously his idea to trick all those people into making us rich and them poor. Not my decision at all...I'm just a regular guy named Bud...Bud Fox...**** you can just call me Budd...cuz Mr. Fox was my daddy's name

You know what I mean
Keyz to my heart

I'm watching Valentine's Day again, everyone; it's such a romantic movie. I'm not just watching it because Taylor Swift is in it...I am not obsessed with her...she is obsessed with me.

What if nothing is even real?
I guess that's pretty standard psychotic thinking
It's like...I know things are real...but I just need to look up the word real on google or something

Every time I ever did something that may or may not have seemed good to other people is actually not my fault at all; I blame Gordon Geko because it was his idea to always be a bad influence on me and never just letting me do my own thing and be myself.

What was I thinking about just now?
Oh yeah...I was smoking some bogies, out on my front porch (out there in the beautiful sunshine of this summer day (is it even really summer yet or still just spring? Am I seriously within the parrenthses of a parenthense right now? I seriously don't know how to spell the word parrenthesis? What hell!) here in God's state of PA) and realizing that Snake Mania is the funnest game I ever played on Facebook probably.
I only have one friend on FB and that's my boy, MPow...he lives out in Vegas...and he's the only purse son left on the web that I trust at all.

Only god can help me now and forever, probably
Every time I put all my faith into myself I lose faith in basically everything, especially myself

People hate me just cuz I'm a real vampire

I feel like just ripping my hair oiut or something...problem is, I recently got it cut really short

Love keeps us coming back
Like a ***** to a needle
Till we get thrown into a rubber sack
Like a lead singer Beatle

Do you even know what you really believe in or are you just convinced you're write? You ain't. I am. I am the righter and you are just one more pathetic, little, marginally talented writer.

Lifehouse is such a great band...never wouldhave thought I'd like Christian rock so much back when I was a "cool" teenager...but these guys are obviously doing the lord's work.

I guess you could say I stepped into the ring with a vendetta but you should never say that nothing didn't hurt me all that while I destroyed everyone who stepped up to me

Life is all about being a snake
Even if you are a very small snake and no one knows and/or cares about you, you can still end up winning; the trick is to trick one of the big snakes into killing their self against your small body and then you eat them and gain their mass, which makes you one of the big snakes.

Reel hat hit tea is crash sing to the ground

I don't want to be a good criminal
I want to get away with nothing
I don't want to be a criminal at all
I want to move from this state
I am not needed here

I don’t want to go back to my old life because I am so sick of it. Sick of it being so old and dying. Why won’t it ever be young and fresh and lively? That’s the way I want it to be or feel, even though I don’t always act like I care. I do care, so much, even though it seems like I don’t.
It is not my job to feel lonely
Is this the office of Bill Bates? Does anyone else know who that is? Ever heard of him? I have? I mean...eye halve ;-)

That’s really cool, man...so cool I can hardly believe it.
Have I been making too much noise or something?
Do I even have enough dignity or not? Am I even very dignified at all? What does dignity even mean? I seriously have no idea. I am trapped with the knowledge. I like pills a lot. I know how to do stuff, even though I don’t have any money, which ***** because I need money so I can buy stuff. I don’t know what to do about it. Sometimes things are just way beyond my control. Like what? Things I can’t grasp or see or get to or whatever. I already need another cigarette. Cigarrettes are good for the health.
The smallest things can really uspet me over time. I get really sick of things.
I am not doing anything wrong...which is the right way to do things.
I just went downstairs and made myself a spot of tea. I never did abandon my boy. I don’t wanna be a loser. I’m leaving you behind. **** like this is why I want to **** myself. I want to commit suicide because my car won’t start...even though I have been watching so many YouTube videos about it. Mechanics...it really is a tough business. I just need to keep my cool and have some faith that everything will work out okay. \I keep us together...whatever it takes.
She said if we’re
I need to get my car started or I’ll **** myself.
My car is still not running so I have to **** myself immediately.

eye let you go
nananananana
Nooooooooooo
<3<3<3<3<3<3
Left alone each time

**** everyone and thing because no one kneads them
Know time for all that extra ****
When you don't get a person's sense of humor that does not bode well
I am having such a crisis write now
I hate life so much

We get what we ask for, even if it's the last thing we wanted; that simple fact can cause you endless laughter and tears
You'll drown and choke on all and/or nothing so long
Just like me and everyone still here

I'm actually feeling really great today, despite yesterday's sad and dramatic events; the pills really do work...over time.
I was on Vyvanse, which is an amphetamine, for a couple years and that stuff made me feel great but I eventually started abusing it a bit and I got really skinny and my teeth almost started falling out and I probably almost died or something. My thoughts were definitely getting more and more horrible and sad or whatever. An knee weigh...too make a long story short, I got sent to the hospital and they made me ween myself of the amps.
Now I'm on Prozac and seer eh quill...because I might have skit sow fray knee ugh or bipolar or both or whatever.
Anyway, the good news is this...I feel like a million bucks today! Got amazing sleep :-) <3 (-:

I obviously wish I always was a good person, who did good things and make great decisions but that's just not the case, even though I want it to be. Sorry. I'm being so redundant again...I guess this is just one of my many defense-mechanisms.
Things when from pretty good to pretty bad pretty **** fast today; it all started with an argument with my little sister...I don't see her much and we just clash negatively these days. So much crap in my head.

Am I waiting for an explosion?
Has that been the point all along?
No, man...probably not
I don't know
I don't know what I want
Just what I like and even that is only a half truth
The whole truth is that I have always known what I like and/or want in life
But just have not always been able to get it for whatever reason
Life is full of reasons and variables
It's all about algebra at the end of the day, my frendz
Algebra is all about bringing the pieces together and understanding it all based on what you do not yet know

Flowerz ****...i do not see the appeal.

My stomach burns
I have a bit of indigestion and it's making me feel like I should just buy a gun from Walmart and blow my **** brains out or something
I am so sick of life and all these minor discomforts that we all have to experience together
I'm so sick of it
My stomach burnzzzzzz, mama!

Just **** me already
If you hate me so much
Life seems so like...unsteady
And I'm so out of touch
I hate my whole life so bad right now
Everything seems so much worse than it should be

Jennifer Garner is such a *******....I don't like her face much
Watching Valentine's Day again

Should I close the lid? Should I close the laptop and let it chill for a bit? Maybe having those key-lights on makes it run hotter than it has to. I am learning how to have better and more clear thoughts, I think; maybe not.
Con necks chin fail yer. Yer is the only word that ain’t a word, I guess. iGuess. It’s a new brand from Apple. I wouldn’t mind having a new Apple II GS to play with.
Nemesis is totally insane; he’s always trying to **** Alice, even though he used to be friends with her.

Eye knead to give my friend Joseph a call or I will die
He is my AA sponsor and is quickly becoming one of my best frendz
He's a fifty-eight year old man
Smart as a whip!
I always thought eye might bee kinda smart but I'm only 33...so he is basically wiser...a mentor
I'm supposed to call him every night at nine-thirty, to check in...but i wanna call now.
It's not even nine-thirty yet?
What the heck!
I should just **** myself or something, even though no one wood even care and it would proof absolutely nut thing!!!!!!!

Do not stand up for what you don't believe in lest you'd be easily knocked down

I am ready to die because I feel this way and I feel this way because I live like I'm ready to do; and so you see, vicious cycles are real.

wHAT am eye **** an endless ocean of dreamzzzz?

It's like if we keep dumping all our time and energy into these computers, forever and ever or until the sun won't shine (for whatever reason,) everything will just instantly get better for everyone somehow...even though it hasn't happened yet, even though this has been going on for so long.

I have no life and I have given everything to people who...I don't know
But I forgive
My faith is in god and I have surrendered

No one can help me with my mommy issues, not even my mommy