You don't need an expert to know that not sleeping can get quite exhausting.
My thoughts are slippery as the grease that wells my eyes.
I'm not human.
You don't need help if the wounds fatal.
Just hear my last words and love them.
I'm not human, they shouldn't matter anyway.
You do not need words if you can't hear. You can't speak. What do they mean? Why do u search for answers?
Because your human?
I'm not human
But I understand
YOU don't have to do this

If you couldnt tell, i dont need a thing
Why would i want anything?
I have everything i need
Food, friends, a place to sleep
Why would you want more?

This arranged misery is quite motivating
I never dreamed so many skeletons could change the way i feel.

If we were a vase, oh the withered marigolds we could hold
If we were a novel my oh my could anyone dare turn a page
If we were a ocean, then all our scaly past endeavors would surely surface
If we were guilt, we would share the same closet

If things were different....
Well i suppose they would still just be "thing's"

Im turnt.
High, inebriated whatever you may say
Cuz i know my blood would never treat me this way
Because sin is always so sweet till it leaves for another
What a shame, what a shame
That it had to be my brother

I am my own worst enemy.
hold these calloused hands, guide me.
take me three steps forward so i can turn back
tell me you love me so can admit that i have nothing to confess
Massage these sore shoulders so i can return to my shell.
Pick up the phone, call the doctor. But I've already been diagnosed.
Im dying inside from self inflicted trauma.
I cant be saved, I dont wanna be saved.
An old man asked quite rhetorically:
Do you want your name in the stars or on a tombstone?

Why cant i have both?

I am a fool.
i always wondered what lasts
i always longed for days past
nostalgia can be a cumbersome thing
when you forget the memories tomorrow will bring

I want to be a mason
not of pebbles and granite
but of love and happiness
and the joy building relationships bring

Life is not perfect
There is no happy ending for some
Remove that luggage
you will find its easier to move on

I had a past
and thats just what it is
we cant save everyone
but we can reminisce

There is no tomorrow
but have no fear for this is today
i feel blessed to see you in such a way
with that presumptuous smile in the moons glow
walk with me
lets travel to the worlds unknown
where i can be whom i want
and you can be you
Tomorrow never comes.
but love is here

I knew an angel, and i was saved
I am my own worst enemy, but by grace i was spared
I've made mistakes, for which you have paid
Not for something in return, but just to make sure i was okay
So many things i never asked, so many things you forgave
The prototype of grace, who i strive to be like someday
Forgive me for my wrongs, you always did me right
Even though i am at war, you fought to end the fight
God help me, help me to never forget those days
When i knew an angel, and i was saved

It was the coldest day of fall, when leaves crowded the sidewalks to listen to the whispering wind that carried them past the trees they left bare.

A silouette of chain links stood ***** before the orange brick vacancy that filled the void left by an urban architects crumbled dreams

It was the coldest day of fall, the coldest day of all to past, forever October will last while the monocole of the seasonal sun stares you down daring you to look past

A silouette of chan links where my old man used to drink, but thats all in the past. Forever October will last. The seasonal sun beams to you. Thank everything beautiful and true. Your days of struggle are through.
R.I.P. LMR 1954-2014

I received it in a letter
with gold parchment prints
I ink my fingertips just a little longer
To hear divine disciples moking
Chanting raspy chatters for a foul stanger with mistaken steps
Steps that leave prints on blackened sand littered with promises of another scam
I dont believe anything that comes from envelopes
Because return addresses from Hades makes me lose all hope
patience becomes shredded to petty pieces peeked through a microscope
If you look a little closer you'll see this life is quite like a kliedoscope
Because were like rockstars with crucifixes
Just diguised as normal folk

This Morning:

A Indigo cloud sank. Washing away my murky memories of yesterday
-Thank you Mister Indigo Cloud

A radiant sun followed. Illuminating this mornings mellow forlay
-Much obliged Mister Sunshine

Nostalgic tunes oozed from my stereo. Reciting only the most recitable fanfare
-Appreciate the timing Mister Music

Then to amplify the presence of my gratuitous present.
My grinder presents me with the wondrous odor of the high life
- You shouldn't have Mary-Jane


They say your attitude determines your latitude.
But your gratitude will determine your current attitude.
The troubles of this life are but temporary.
To receive happiness remember
There is much to be grateful for.
Believe. That it will be given from your heart to mind

Broken thoughts, Broken promises.
I remember you promised you'd be there.
The toxic waste
That leaks from your heart and mind
Poisons my remaining self-worth.
My sense of self validity
Vanishes.
Like a Copperfield canary.
You were my other half.
Now my circle of trust
Is simply an open parenthesis

And you get to witness the destruction of mankind
The manifestation of violence
The rise of crime
The chemically induced joy that deteriorates the mind
The cancerous legions on the soul that no doctor can find
The shaman surgeon with the power to freeze time
The emotionally famished family that uncle sam left behind

The monotonous chime that causes the suits and ties to burst into reanimation
The unmovable path of the bullet that kills without hesitation
The murderous gang-banger dining in hells kitchen with no reservation
The chains that bound the vagabond with no visitations
The gruesome violence on the silver-screen that is met with joyous elation
The exchange of video entertainment for a basic education
The deterioration of the young minds that's given little concentration
The beautiful flesh but empty soul that makes a living through fornication
The ****** spoils of war that leads to mental devastation
The death of good-will with no justification

And you will not witness death but morale genocide
Not of a specific person, but of certain values that are impossible to hide
And with only one man to confide, they will continuously choose what is not right
They will put down their crucifixes so they will have more hands to fight
And only for the wicked reasons will they unite

And you will witness them as they witness you
As you teach of accountability, as you lecture of love
But you will often be met with a deaf ear
But do not give up on those ideals that you hold dear
Because if you look to the edges of the earth, and then gaze above
Ask yourself: Where do I want to be when it is time to be judged?
But despite our ideals our conscience decisions proves the prophecies true
*We will be the death of mankind

I looked in the mirror today, and no one looked back
perhaps i was blinded by the shortcomings of my life
i looked in the mirror today and couldn't see my reflection
maybe i was blindfolded by the man who said i was loser, a coward, and would never amount to nothin,
i looked in the mirror today and sae the same void i witnessed everyday,
maybe it was so i could not behold the monster i had became,
i looked in the mirror today and believed i would see something,
and i don't really know why because i never really believed in nothing,
i looked in the mirror today and saw chaos and destruction,
and wondered what do i deserve in this world i do not belong,
i looked in the mirror today and couldn't see the tears,
why am i blinded by shame?
why am i consumed by fear?
why do i continue to look into a mirror when no ones there?
i looked in the mirror today and i spoke, i spoke words i didn't want myself to hear
i spoke honestly what i had shared was sincere
i spoke to my soul before a deity with crimson eyes appeared
i was done feeling ashamed! i was finished being afraid!
i was tired of seeing nothing everyday!
in that mirror i saw Satan himself,
the same face i woke up everyday hoping to never see
the shameful dishonest fear inside of me
the evaporation of my hopes of making life what i want it to be.

To the man with crimson eyes i found i had nothing say
so i shattered the glass and i walked away

I looked in the mirror today, and i saw peace

Though my outward appearance may seem somewhat complex
-In this Hard-wired soul
It is the machinery that's run by electricity that generates creativity that would vex Einstein himself
-But it is all relative to this hard-wired soul
Because it was through the wire that I calculated the desire or rather my need to aquire the programming need to love you
-But it wasn't that simple for this weary hard-wired soul
Because I am based upon logic so when I try to complete what I had started the numbers just overrun like a leaky faucet
-You just may be too much for this hard-wired soul
And on one day I twitched, skipped and even began to glitch just from the thought of loving you
Because while the assembly may be perfect for this computerized hermit I still cant calculate if the chances are worth it, so maybe I should just hit reset and accept the regret of not having the correct programming for you yet
-But you ought not sleep on this hard-wired soul
So I beep and I peep, and you reply with a positive tweet the answer this old machine always wanted to hear
I could have cried if a computer ever tried because my data began to skip and glide a most unusual stride
Because she said yes.
But my circuits are fried!

Ive seen, I see, I saw
What's refined is actually raw
What's done is laced with flaw
What's perfect is actually a lucky draw
Ive been where I am, and that's where I am going
To the place where the faces are the same
To the location Ive never gone, but have always been
Destined to be in the destination where we meet again
Ive wrote to write, and will never write again
For they are but lies leaking from a pen
For they are the sub-conscience creepers creeping within
For they were my past,
Are my present,
And will be my glorious end.

I've felt.

And I feel that I will be feeling,
Two-parts love and hate...

Fake is real: and real is equally fake