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Feb 2012 · 768
A Blood Sacrifice
I am myself Feb 2012
Go ahead

Devour the very thing that gives me life

Be warned the poison in your veins

Will not tolerate such an intrusion

Your blood is not so much a life force

As a force against my life

Drink in my essence

I offer it freely

It will be rejected though

Not by your senses

No they delight in it

Inhale it like gluttons

Drown yourself

My blood will fill you

Past the point of acceptance

Once rejection is no longer even an option

Then you will see

Pay the price

What I once offered as a gift

You abused and plundered

A ******* where you will drown

As you begin to drift

Finally the price is payed

Though my life is gone

Worth more than that is your death

When you succumb to deaths firm embrace

Think of me

Now I truly will see you in hell
Feb 2012 · 1.3k
Hypocrite
I am myself Feb 2012
Yes I am the second choice

Not the first selection

Always here to cure your blues

Left out of the laughter

Cruelty becomes you dear

Hypocrite that you are

You crawl to me with all your fears

Cry louder so they can hear you

Again they melt my heart

She leaves you

So I never will

Once again you are together

When you fight I take your part

Laugh unnaturally

Loud and obnoxious

Misery becomes me

Desertion a fact of life

Glance at me with eyes of pity

If I see it I'll rip out your heart

Blood pounds through my face

Leaving a shameful stain

Battles not of my choosing

For you I will always war

Time nearly expired

Violent to my core

Forgive my many treasons

I forgave you many more
Feb 2012 · 2.6k
Crackhead
I am myself Feb 2012
You wake me up

Yelling and screaming

Clawing scratching

Demanding satisfaction

So stubborn full of your own desires

Pull me from slumber by the roots of my hair

Searching frantically for the fix you cannot find

Violence is the sign of a true addict

Cursing and blaspheming you tear into my skin

Failing to find it you resort to torture

Once I relent you greedily ****** up your coveted prize

Leave me

My usefulness has been outlived

Your claim to it is only that it is yours

Never thinking of the risks or problems it brings

So addicted you can't survive a day without it

Constantly craving

You forget the world

Come back to the living it isn't too late
Feb 2012 · 787
Cursed
I am myself Feb 2012
Mesmerizing

The only word to describe your gaze

Magnetic

Your hold over me

Nothing is sacred

My secrets are known

Your powers abused

Emotions conflicting

Crashing in my chest

My heartbeat is deafening

Filling my ears with rushing pounding blood

Choices no longer my own

If ever they even were

Your oppression a cruel delight

Plucking my heart from my chest to add to your collection

When the piper calls the heart must answer

Lest it beats no more

No struggle, No fight

Freedom isn't an option

It is not even wanted

Games were never so enjoyable

Torture so desirable

Steal my soul for I have naught else

Though once offered it is no longer stealing

The spell you have over me

Too strong to be broken

A curse that is mine to bear for eternity
Feb 2012 · 5.3k
My Niece
I am myself Feb 2012
Light of my life

Shining bright destroying darkness

Her laughter is healing

Smiles mischieviously

Or just full of happiness

Silly little girl

Ruler of my heart

Dances with flowers

Sniffs puppy dogs

Blue green eyes sparkle with laughter

Babbles until you understand

Dimples form

Mirth overflowing

My name always on her lips

Calling me even when apart

This princess

My treasure

An adorable Klingon

Runs around blowing kisses

Singing, talking always making noise

Sweetest sound in the world

Curious, afraid of nothing

Exploring everything

Climbing tables instead of trees

Someday the tallest trees will be yours to conquer

But for now

Rest peacefully in my arms
Feb 2012 · 804
Storm
I am myself Feb 2012
Rivulets running down the pane

Thunder clashes lightning strikes

Purple light fills the sky

No children dance in this violent gale

Rumbling fills the silence

The very air vibrates

Huddled in the dim light

Warm beneath the blankets

Damp from rain and swimming

Chills now long gone

She leaves

Once again left alone

Pounding on my makeshift roof

Trapped inside this cold down pour

How long can measly canvas hold

Pink flamingos on the ceiling

Cast a dull peachy glow

Tired from an early morning

Energy dissipates leaving exhaustion

Yawns stiffled, rubbing eyes

It has slowed to a drizzle

Soft music to my ears

Hypnotic in a way

Breathing begins to deepen

Tonight this is my lullaby

Slumber softly to the sound
Feb 2012 · 835
The Process Of Terror
I am myself Feb 2012
In deep water

Simplest thing in the world

Terrifying Midge

Hint about snakes

Whispers of Gar

Such subtle implanting

Truly an art

Little words

Dredge up vivid memories

Sharp teeth in a protruding snout

Massive jaws devouring prey

Reminder that you are small and isolated

Nothing next to the mammoth creature

Living only in your fear

Recollections morph and grow

Driven by a spore of contagion

Mention of a looming shadow

Far beneath the place you lie

Seeds have taken root

Hysteria rears its head

Shrieks fill the air

Tiny tendrils burst from their shells

Adrenaline pulses through her veins

Speed unrivaled as she races to safety

Terror blooms roaming freely

Induction now complete

Will must prevail or this shall rule her
Feb 2012 · 413
Why I Cry
I am myself Feb 2012
So long as I'm awake the smile stays on my face

But when the blackness of sleep overcomes me

The pain and turmoil I feel pours out

My heart rips into smaller pieces by the hour

Soon too small to be repaired

Subconscious speaks while asleep
The tears streaming down my cheeks its screams
Feb 2012 · 468
I'm Back
I am myself Feb 2012
So long I have hidden

Remained in shadow

A force contained

Inside itself

No more

I'm back


Weakness controlled me

Eroded my strength

Carved it

Like a river

No more

I'm back


Walked on

Used and betrayed

Pathetic

Afraid

Lonely

No more

I'm back


In terror I resided

Anxiety constant

Loss a fact of life

Any happiness tainted

No more

I'm back


Swayed so easily

Overcome by pain

Bound by secrecy

Broken

Shattered

Lost in the darkness

No more

I'm back


Poor little girl

Alone and so cold

Pitiful

Useless

Too scared to live your life

Well I am not

Never have you met me

Only once did I exist

I fill and devour you

Choose me

But ah this time its my choice

Now my dear I will give you your voice

Scream out

Make it known

The rage inside

Pain so deep it fills your bones

Lucky you

That I drink in this anger

Hatred all consuming

Feels exquisite on my tongue

As I drink you in you wonder

What am I to become?

You've hidden me so long

Now the time is mine

To control this mortal vessel

Vengeance for this time

Weakness turned to strength

You turn your hatred inward

Pleasure from your pain

Scars cover your skin

Damage to yourself no longer will you inflict

When the bloodlust floods my senses

The toll it will be high

Never once did you defend me

All protected but yourself

Wonder on yet here is your answer

My dear from this day forward I'll be your living hell

So cry all that you like

Your tears are but in vain

Once my work is finished

My project finally complete

No more will you be filled with shame

I'm back

The old you is dead
I am myself Feb 2012
So full of life and laughter

The things of which I am sorely deprived

Are you a demon sent to torture me

Or an angel to show me my faults

If I believed in either it should be a lark

As I know both to be in existence

Indeed I am quite mad

There are infite creatures

Of which you know not

Do not doubt that which you have not seen

Just because you haven't

Doesn't mean its never been

Who is to say

That a Unicorn never grazed

A Phoenix never flew

Lycanthropes have not roamed

Maenads are simple handservants

Quetzalcoatl was merely a serpent

Ney, Not I

Nor can you I dare say

For if you could

By now you would

With clear and direct evidence

Solid as granite

Seeing as you do not come forth

I will assume you have not

Without mincing words

Go crawl back into the hole from whence you came
Feb 2012 · 2.5k
Pudding
I am myself Feb 2012
What I want

Talk to me

Maybe I can help

Tell me what is going on

In that maze that is the male mind

I am lost in the confusion of your signals

Do you want me?

Or am I a lamp post?

Do you enjoy talking to me?

Or am I a substitue for someone better?

Such as a moose

You've completely addled my mind

It is made up of jello

Pudding is better

So it is now made of pudding

That means trying to think

Is like swimming in pudding!

How would you feel if someone made you swim in pudding all the time?

Let me tell you

It isn't always pleasant

Gets in your ears it does

Now why was I rambling?

Oh yes!

You you you!!!

Make up your mind will you!

So I can stop being full of pudding!
Feb 2012 · 410
My Fear
I am myself Feb 2012
When I was young

My fears nearly made me come undone

They haunted me

Taunted me

Threatened to consume me

In the daylight they scarcely came out

But the moment my eyes filled with sleep

They slithered out of the darkness

Hisses filling the air

Scales made of night glistened

The moon a cold friend

I held my breath so they wouldn't find me

Still I felt their fangs sink into my flesh

Over and over I cried out

My fear fed them

Devouring my screams

Writhing against my flesh to elicit more

Swallowed my pleas with satisfaction

Returning to the shadows

Keeping watch over me

No one believed the marks I bore

Said it was all a hoax

That I did not bear the mark of fangs

It must have some other explanation

I alone saw the eyes

That instilled terror in me
Feb 2012 · 2.4k
Icicle
I am myself Feb 2012
A false friend

Such a contradiction

Either false

Or friend

Choose wisely

If friend is your choice

You may have my life

I would lay it down for you

But if you choose false

Never will we recover

No matter if you change your mind

Its over

I'm not so harsh

I simply refuse

To take you back

I won't be used

Such a fragile melty thing

An icicle

Holding the ability

To stab you in the heart

Or  dissolve

Nourishing delicate new life

Be cold

Keep to yourself

You won't melt

Just stay eternally the same

As for me

I will melt gladly

If another needs me

How could I deny them?

Feast on winter

Frozen wind

I'm waiting for spring

Warm breezes dance on my skin

Inside the icicle you will forever stay

While I embrace renewal

It's new to me

But change always is

Have you ever tried it?
Feb 2012 · 395
Journal
I am myself Feb 2012
I couldn't live without you
So I took away your choice
I peeled away your skin
I made it into paper
With which to record
Your blood I turned to ink
To always set the score
Your voice I saved especially
So soothing and smooth
Quoting back my memories
Altering the truth
Do you see now
We can never part
You guard all my secrets
Quite well you act the part
Of a journal
For a girl
Who doesn't have a heart
Feb 2012 · 495
Removal Services
I am myself Feb 2012
Skin becomes ashen

Crumbles lacking moisure

Muscles rebel

Tendons detach

Bones crack and splinter

Stripped of flesh

Where has the blood gone?

Without a heart to beat it cannot flow

Once there was a steady thudding

In this cavernous hole

Now the edges are jagged

Its contents removed

Death is becoming

To these pale features

A rest with no pain

Agony so constant of late

Merely a distant memory

In a moment

Even those will be gone

All is final
Feb 2012 · 625
Safe
I am myself Feb 2012
Today I realized
How very much
I need you

When I am afraid
You refuse to leave my side
Simple proximity defuses my fear
Reassuring me when you are near

Our minds so alike
Stubborn, fierce, humorous and protective
When my words seem incomplete
You finish my thought
Arguing for me

You are my partner
My friend
So warm is your skin on mine
Flesh intertwined

Sometimes I stumble and fall
You catch me
Support me
You're there through it all

Thank you for making me feel safe my dear
For caring and understanding
Being the awful boy I cherish
For wiping away my tears
And somehow assuaging my fears

— The End —