Are you ever on a bus with someone
And you have one earphone in
And you change the song every 20 seconds
Whenever you open your phone
Not because you dislike the song
But because you don't want them to realise you're waiting for a text back
From the one person you want to be with
And when it comes you don't open it straight away
So they don't think you're obsessed
Or is it just me?

I wanna die
Maybe then I'll be able to breathe

It's amazing how I feel torn apart without you holding me
When before I couldn't wait for the hugs to stop
I want you to rest your chin on my head
And whisper nice things into my hair
As you kiss me
But instead I'm on a train
Away from you
It looks clinical
Out of a syfi movie
And I can't breathe

People don't like the sight of it
But there's something calming about
Watching the red drip down my leg
The water gets in and it stings
But it distracts from the pain in my chest so it's fine
Maybe if I hurt there next it'll go away
The contrast of the hot water
And the cold tiles are nice
And I know i shouldn't
I'm not gonna wanna die later
So I take a small razor
It won't be to bad
Just enough to draw enough blood to satisfy me
But how long will this much be enough?

I'm sitting wrapped in a towel
Wet and lonely
Wishing your arms were around me
But because of my fears I feel like you'd rather have them around somebody else
Maybe they are
Please for the love of god
Brain please stop
He's sleeping
Hopefully dreaming
But probably not about me

You're the reason I'm alive
Because If I die and there's a heaven
I'll spend eternity wishing I was back with you
If I die and then get reincarnated
I'll spend my next life feeling like something's missing
I was never scared of dying
I'm still not
I'm scared of losing you.